


EmilyxReader Imagines and Oneshots

by Before_my_time



Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: Behavioral Analysis Unit (Criminal Minds), F/F, Fluff and Angst, Lesbian Emily Prentiss, Smut, Soft Emily Prentiss
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-04
Updated: 2021-03-04
Packaged: 2021-03-17 00:33:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 44
Words: 72,339
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29833302
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Before_my_time/pseuds/Before_my_time
Summary: Basically just a bunch of Fluffly and Angsty (and smutty) Emily Prentiss imagines with Female Reader
Relationships: Emily Prentiss/Reader
Comments: 3
Kudos: 35





	1. ~ Author's Note ~

A couple of things I want to make clear before you start reading, 

1 - First I just want to thank you for reading my writing. I had originally posted all of this on Wattpad, but somebody told me I should post here too, but I honestly don't expect anybody to read it here. 

2 - A reminder that all of these imagines will have a female reader. There will be some chapters where it is specified if the reader is a lesbian or bisexual, but most can be read as either. 

3 - Unless it is specified otherwise, each chapter is meant to be read as a different Oneshot. 

4 - Last but not least, I get a lot of inspiration from other stories I have read, plus also the show itself. If you read a chapter and find that it is too similar to your writing, or something that you have read, please call me out on it so I can take the chapter down. The last thing I want to do is plagiarize somebody else's work. 

Ok, that is all for now! I hope you all enjoy xoxo


	2. Are you gay?

Everybody was gathered together each looking at the files, trying to figure out a way to put together a profile. So far you guys have found 4 bodies, all mutilated and left out in the open. Honestly, you have been here all day and nobody is really paying attention until Reid perks up and calls Garcia. 

“Garcia,” he says after putting her on speaker, “The way all of the victims were murdered leads me to believe it was personal. Do the victims have anything in common that would cause somebody to hate them.” Everybody waits for an answer as you hear Garcia typing. 

“Oh, you are smart! Each victim had gone to a gay nightclub a couple of days before they were killed. They were all openly gay, lesbian, or bisexual.” You flush a little after Garcia finishes but nobody notices.

“So you think the unsub is targeting these people because he has something against gay people,” Rossi asks. 

“That makes sense, with this we could probably put together a pretty good profile,” Hotch says as he gets up and heads to the other room. You notice some people following him out of the room but you are too in your head to really notice who. Suddenly you jump as you feel a hand on your shoulder. You look up to see Emily next to you, and JJ across the room, both looking at you with worry in their eyes.

“Hey, are you ok?” You swallow the lump in your throat and plaster a fake smile on your lips. 

“Yeah I am fine,” you say as you stand up from your seat, “I just need to go to the bathroom really quick.” You rush out of the room as quickly as you can without drawing any attention and close yourself into the bathroom.

The second the door closes you let out a breath of air and tears start to fill your eyes. This is all new to you, unlike Emily and Hotch you can’t compartmentalize like they do, and knowing that all of these victims are just like you had a bigger effect on you than you thought it would. 

Suddenly you hear a knock on the door and a soft voice. 

“(Y/N) can I come in?” You wipe your eyes, turn around to the door, and open it to see Emily. She moves into the bathroom and closes the door behind her. Turning back to you she pulls you into her arms and you automatically break down. She is whispering softly into your ear and caresses your back. 

You eventually contain your emotions and start to pull away from her but she still holds you close. 

“Sorry, I got tears on your shirt.” She gives a small laugh and wipes the stray tears from your cheeks. 

“It’s ok,” She looks at you in your eyes, “can you talk to me? What made you so upset?” 

You look down awkwardly and bite your lip. 

“I guess I am just not used to this job yet. Seeing all of those victims mutilated bodies and knowing that in a different circumstance it could’ve been me.” You say without even registering the words coming out of your mouth, Emily understands what you are saying though. 

“(Y/N), are you gay?” Tears start to well up in your eyes again and you nod your head. “Am I the first person you have told that to?” Again you nod your head. Emily places her hand under your chin and gently lifts your head up to meet her eyes. She smiles at you and your heart stops. 

“This doesn’t change anything, you know that right? I don’t think of you any differently and neither will the team. I would know, I came out to them a long time ago.” Your face fills with surprise and your mouth drops open.

“You’re gay too?” She nods. Before your mind has time to catch up to what your body is doing you feel yourself pressing your lips to Emily’s. You start to panic, but before you can pull away, her hand that was under your chin moves to your back and pulls you closer to her. Eventually, you both breakaway and stare at each other, smiles on both of your faces. 

“You don’t know how long I have been waiting to do that,” she says to you with a small laugh. 

“Well, in that case, I should have come out to you a long time ago,” you say as you both lean in for another kiss. 

“Now let's go back before they start to wonder where we went.” She says as she takes your hand in hers. “And don’t worry, if anybody tries to hurt you they will have to get through me.” She says as you both walk out of the bathroom.


	3. Touch Me

If anybody had to ask you about your love language, yours was physical touch, no doubt about it. Whether it is with your friends, family, or lovers, you are a very touchy person. This is very obvious in your relationship with one Emily Prentiss. When the two of you are together, more often than not you are expressing your love language. 

When you are on the jet, you guys are often snuggled together. Sometimes you will play with Emily’s hair when you should be listening to Hotch. And you couldn’t even count the number of times your hand found hers when a case was particularly difficult.

However, despite this, you haven’t laid a single hand on Emily Prentiss in the last two weeks. 

You realized you have feelings for Emily one day after work. Being best friends the two of you often went to each other's houses to just relax after a stressful day of work. On this day, the two of you had gone to your place to watch a movie. The both of you started off sitting on the couch but halfway through the movie, and two glasses of wine each later, you find yourself tucked under Emily’s arm snuggled close to her side. Sometime before the movie ends you feel yourself drifting to sleep. 

When you wake up, you are in your bed. Stretching out and turning over, you notice that you aren’t alone. On the other side of your bed, Emily is fast asleep. You feel a twang in your heart and a smile graces your lips as you reach over to gently touch her cheek. I wouldn’t mind waking up like this every morning, you think to yourself. Wait what, you quickly jerk your hand away, no I can’t think of Emily like that she’s my best friend. 

Your sudden movement makes Emily stir and she reaches over and wraps her arm around your waist in her sleep pulling you closer to her. It feels like a hundred butterflies are fluttering around in your gut, and it was at that moment you knew you were royally fucked. She is only doing this because she is asleep, she doesn’t know. 

You repeatedly tell yourself of this but that doesn’t change the fact that every time you even make contact with Emily, you get that flutter in your gut again. 

Hotch had just called everybody to debrief about your newest case and when you walk into the room you see that everybody is already seated. The only seat left is next to Emily, so you begrudgingly walk over and take the seat. Emily smiles at you but notices when you don’t give your usually cheerful smile back. 

Halfway through the debriefing, Emily looks over to you with a concerned look. She notices that you haven’t taken your eyes off of the table. Assuming that the details of the case are getting to you, she reaches over to take your hand, as she usually would in this situation. But instead of letting her, you move your hand away and instead place it on your lap. You notice a look of hurt flash over her face, but in a room full of profilers she doesn’t let it linger. 

“Wheels up in 30,” Hotch says as everybody gets up from the table and gets ready to leave. Everybody has left except for you and Emily, and just as you were about to walk out of the door, she grabs your wrist. Instinctively you jerk out of her grip, and she stares at you in disbelief. You’ve never acted this way before, and you are so embarrassed by yourself that you walk out of the room, leaving Emily standing in the same spot. 

This case was rough. Every case that involves children takes its toll on the entire team, and those are usually the nights you spend with Emily, but you couldn’t. The entire jet ride back you sit next to Spencer and listen to him prattle out random facts, instead of taking your usual seat next to Emily. You don’t even wait for her like you usually do once you get back to Quantico. You get in your car and drive home, still trying to distance yourself from any feelings you might have. 

You are in your kitchen making yourself some tea when you hear a knock on your door. You walk over and open it, seeing exactly who you expected and exactly who you wished it wouldn’t be. 

“Tell me what is wrong right now.” She pushes her way into your apartment and turns around to look at you with her arms crossed over her chest. 

“Emily, what are you talking about?” You ask as you close the door that she had left open. As soon as you turn back around you see she has moved closer to you. She reaches out and lightly grabs your hand. You let her until she enlaces her fingers in yours and the butterflies start back up again. You pull your hand out of hers. 

“You just pulled your hand away from mine,” she says quietly, a look on her face as if she were trying to understand a hard math equation. 

“I had an itch” You walk away back to the kitchen to take the water for your tea off of the stove. You hear Emily quickly following after you. 

“Stop lying”

“I'm not lying” You turn back around and she reaches out to touch your face. You back away from her hand and she drops it back to her side. 

“You just did it again. What is going on with you? You always hold my hand, and give me random hugs, and play with my hair. Did I do something to you? Are you disgusted by me?” You see tears starting to brim at the edges of Emily’s eyes and you suddenly are filled with guilt. 

“No Emily it’s not that I swear” you plead. 

“Then give me your hand,” she says as she reaches out towards you. You look down at her palm and gingerly place your hand into hers. You feel yourself being pulled and find yourself wrapped in Emily’s arms. The butterflies are back in full swing but you couldn’t care less. God, I missed this, you think to yourself as you allow your body to relax in her embrace. Emily pulls back just enough to look you in the eye and smiles. 

“See, now is it really so bad to be this…” Emily starts to say, but before she can even finish her sentence you close the gap between you two and press your lips against hers. To your surprise, Emily catches on really quickly and almost immediately starts kissing you back. When you both need air you slowly break apart. 

“Emily I am so sorry, I didn’t mean to do that. It’s just every time I touch you I just feel like I am going insane and I just…” This time it was Emily who cut you off by kissing you again, this time with more fire and passion. Fireworks, stars, butterflies, all of the above went off in your head. 

Pushing her back against the counter, your hands roam over her waist and stomach gradually making their way down to her butt. Moaning as she feels her hands over your body, she wraps her legs around your waist and you prop her up on the counter. Your lips move from her lips to her neck and you know there is going to be a hickey tomorrow, but the noises she is making make you keep going. 

“(Y/N),” Emily gasps out, feeling your hands roaming over her thighs. You pull away to look her in the eyes and see nothing but lust. In the most seductive tone you have ever heard she says,

“Touch me”

And you did, over and over again that night.


	4. Never Lose Me Again

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW - Mentions of Suicidal thoughts and Panic attacks  
> Spoiler Warning - Seasons 6 and 7

You were seated at the round table when Hotch told the team the news. Emily was back. After seven months of heartbreak. 213 days of tears. 5110 hours of wishing it were you on that table instead of her. 

“I’m so sorry,” She said as she stood at the door. Everybody gets up to hug her, but you sit still. You are frozen in your seat trying to convince yourself that she isn’t just a ghost.

After the whole team has given her a hug, their attention goes over to you. You cautiously stand up and stare Emily in the eyes. Those big brown eyes that you prayed you could get lost in again. She takes a step forward, and you match that with a step back.

“(Y/N)...” Hearing the tone of her voice suddenly fills you with anger. That same voice that used to whisper your name as you drifted off to sleep. That same voice that reassured you whenever you were down. That same voice haunted you for months and kept you awake in your nightmares. 

“No! No you don’t get to just pop back up like this, you don’t get to do that.”

“(Y/N), come on don’t be like that” Morgan says as he moves closer to you. You turn your attention to him as your glare shoots daggers into him. 

“Fuck you, Morgan, fuck you for taking her side.” You turn and look at Hotch and JJ, “And you know what fuck you two too. I came to both of you, I told you about my depression, I told you about my nightmares. JJ you were the first person I called after my attempt. And you just let me suffer and mourn. How dare you.” You push past her and the rest of your team and storm out of the room, out of the building, and straight into your car where you broke down in sobs. 

\- - - - - - - - - - - -

Emily and JJ both start to follow you out of the door, but Hotch and Morgan stop them. 

“Guys, it’s understandable that she is going to take this whole thing a lot harder than everybody else. She needs some space right now, and we really need to get back to this case.” Everybody kind of nods and mumbles in agreement. 

“Ok, Morgan Reid, you guys head down to the crime scene, Rossi, you and I will talk to the deputies about what they know, and JJ you, and Prentiss could head down to the coroner’s office and see if she has anything. Meanwhile if (Y/N) contacts anybody, let me know.” After everybody is assigned their duties they get to work. 

JJ and Emily get in the Jeep and start to head to the coroner’s office. The silence is thick as JJ grips the steering wheel so tight her knuckles are stark white, and Emily stares out of the window. Emily is the first one to break it. 

“She really did that?” Her voice is barely above a whisper and she doesn't elaborate anymore but JJ automatically knows what she is referring to.

“Oh yeah,” JJ clears her throat and continues, “After you “died” she started having really bad nightmares which turned into sleepless nights which led to depression. One night she called me crying and apologizing, saying how she didn’t deserve to be the one alive. Things got pretty bad and she had to be hospitalized.” JJ took her eyes off of the road and glanced over at Emily who was still looking out of the window a faint shine of fresh tears now in her eyes. 

“She’ll never forgive me,” Emily says as the first of many tears streamed down her face, “She needed me, and I was gone.” 

“It’s like Hotch said, she just needs time.”

And you definitely took your time. 

\- - - - - - - - - - - -

Emily had now been back for a month and things weren’t any better. Your interaction with her was limited to anything that was work-related, and even then you often asked to be partnered with Reid instead. You also had been terse and irritable around JJ and Hotch, and everybody could tell that the team’s dynamic was off. Not only that, but the stress of the whole ordeal had led to your panic attacks coming back. You felt like it was your fault, but no matter what you couldn’t bring yourself to forgive them. There was only one thing you could do to fix the team. 

Walking into the bullpen, you head straight to Hotch’s door and knock. 

“Come in” He calls out. 

You push the door open to see him sitting behind his desk going through files. He looks up and is startled when he sees that it is you. It had been a month since the two of you had even had a real conversation and the times that you did talk were instigated by him, so it was a bit of a shock to see you in his office. You clear your throat and say, 

“Hotch I need to transfer. I can’t get over my anger towards you, JJ, and Emily and mad as I still am, I never want to endanger this team, and if I stay that is exactly what I will be doing. If I can’t transfer then I guess this is me putting in my resignation.” You hold your breath after your rant and look at Hotch to see his reaction. His face is stoic as always but something in his eyes has changed. 

“I can’t force you to stay, no matter how much I know this team needs you. I will get into contact with some colleagues and see if anybody is looking for some extra help and get back to you on that transfer. But until I get word back you are still a part of this team and as your boss, I am sending you home for the day and giving you time to make sure this is what you want.” 

“Hotch, I don’t need time,” he holds up a hand to silence you. 

“This isn’t a discussion, you are going to go home, and come back tomorrow and if your decision is still the same then we will continue.” You could tell he wasn’t going to take no for an answer so you just nod and head back out of his door and to your car. 

Pulling up to your apartment you walk through the door and immediately collapse on the couch. You feel your head pounding as intrusive thoughts start to drown out everything else. 

Of course, leave it to you to screw everything up for everybody else. God, get over yourself. You walk around crying like a little baby because they lied to you and now look at what you’ve done. You are so pathetic, it really is a shame that your attempt didn’t succeed. 

You feel yourself spiraling into a panic attack and grab your phone. Without registering what you are doing you dial a number and listen to the dial tone. 

“(Y/N)?”

“Help” You hear the person on the other line say something about being right over but it doesn’t register as you fight to catch your breath again. 

What feels like hours passes and you hear somebody let themselves into your apartment. Suddenly you are being comforted by a familiar voice telling you to breathe and calm down, and it works. You get your breathing under control while you are wrapped in their warm arms and start to come back to your senses. 

“Hey, you're ok, it’s ok I am here you’re here and everything is fine.” She whispers in your ear. Gently pulling out of her arms you look up at her face and start crying. 

“I am so sorry Emily.”

“You have nothing to be sorry about. I am sorry for everything, I never knew how much you were hurting. If I could have come back then I would have. There were days when I wanted to say screw it and run back to you I swear. I wished more than anything that we could’ve been together. I am so sorry.”

You two sit like that for a while, Emily cradling your body on the couch while both of you guys are crying. Eventually, you drift off to sleep. 

You wake up to find yourself now in your bed, with Emily sitting in the chair across the room looking at you. You raise up and motion for her to come over. She stands and slowly starts to walk over to you but before she lays down she asks, 

“Are you sure, if you’re still not ready I can leave right now?” You grab her hand and pull her onto the bed and the two of you lay there facing each other. You reach out and push some of her hair out of her face and gently rest your hand on her cheek. 

“I want to forgive you, I want to be happy again. I want to wake up and see your face. I want to be able to hold you throughout the night. I want all of that again, I just think I was scared of letting you back in because of how much it hurt when I lost you.” She grabs your hand that was on her face and kisses your knuckles. 

“I will spend the rest of my life making it up to you if you will let me. And I promise that you will never lose me again.” You tilt your head up and press your lips against Emily’s. God, you missed this feeling. The kiss was gentle and soft, but it brought back the most powerful emotions and memories. You both pull away from the kiss with smiles on your faces. 

“Does this mean you are going to stay?” She asks as her hand snakes around your waist pulling you impossibly closer to her. 

“How could I ever leave now?” You place another kiss on her lips and snuggle into her side, as you both drift off to sleep, thinking of the future with the woman you thought you had lost.


	5. Hangover

The team had just gotten home from a really rough case. You eventually figured out who the Unsub was but before you guys could apprehend him and arrest him, he set off a bomb which killed himself and his whole family. 

The entire plane ride home was tense and nobody was really talking to each other. It wasn’t until all of you guys had gotten back to Quantico and back inside of the bullpen that Morgan broke the tension. 

“I could use a drink, who is with me?” Everybody agreed except for Hotch and JJ both of which claimed they had to get home to their children. The rest of you found yourself at a local bar not much later. 

You, Emily, and Garcia start at the table while the boys go and get drinks. 

“So ladies, any gossip we need to get out before the boys come back,” Garcia says with a suggestive smirk. She nudges Emily with her elbow, “Any men in the picture yet Em?”

You both notice how Emily’s cheeks turn a slight shade of pink as she tries to suppress the smile forming on her lips. Emily looks away from the two of you nervously and tries to change the subject. 

“Shouldn’t the boys be back with our drinks by now, I should probably go see what is taking them so long.” She quickly gets up from her seat and moves away towards the bar area. Garcia looks over at you and winks. 

“I may not be a profiler but that obviously meant something. Emily has a boy toy she doesn’t want us to know about.” You give Garcia a forced smile, but really all you want to do is scream. 

You have had a crush on Emily since the day you first joined the team. She was always so nice to you when you joined the team and ever since. It also didn’t help that she looked like such a badass when she put on her vest. But of course, she was straight and you knew you didn’t have a chance.

“We have to get her to spill her guts tonight.” Garcia continues, and luckily, Rossi, Morgan, Reid, and Emily all come back with your dinks. You gladly take yours and start drinking, because it is going to take you more than one drink to get through tonight. 

The six of you talk and joke for a while until Rossi mentions that he is going to head out before Krystal starts to wonder where he was at. At this Garcia perks up as if she just remembered something really important. 

“Speaking of relationships, Emily, would you like to tell the boys about a special someone?” Morgan and Reid turn their heads towards Emily, clearly intrigued, as you focus all of your attention on the bottle in your hand. 

“Emily, you didn’t tell us you had a man,” Morgan says teasingly. Emily shoots him back a dirty look. 

“That’s because I don’t.” She responds

“That’s actually not true, when Garcia mentioned this “special someone” your eyes dilated. Not only that but you reached up to play with your hair and your posture became more rigid. All telltale signs that you have a physical attraction to somebody.” Reid chimes in with a smile that says he is satisfied with himself. 

“Hey,” Emily says, “What ever happened to no profiling teammates?” She asks irritation slightly in her voice. 

“Come one princess, it’s all in good fun. So are you going to tell us about this man or what?” Morgan asks. You quickly finish off the rest of your drink and get up to get another one, no longer able to sit here and talk about Emily’s love life. 

“I am going to get another beer. Does anybody want one?” You ask the table. They all respond with some form of no and you walk away from the table. 

Instead of returning, you end up sitting at the bar and having a couple more drinks by yourself. Figures, you think to yourself, everybody is so wrapped up in Emily’s stupid little boy drama that they don’t even care that I haven’t come back. 

An hour, and a couple more drinks later you find yourself dancing in the middle of the dance floor. You see Emily approaching and motion for her to come over to you. She does and you pull her arms around your waist and start dancing with her. She gives you a look and says 

“(Y/N), what are you doing? You never came back.” You give her a silly grin and respond, 

“What does it look like I am doing? I am dancing with my bestie.” She just stares at you as you dance around her. 

“Come on Emily,” you say as you pull her body flush against yours, “don’t you want to dance with me?” She looks around the dance floor and grabs your wrist and pulls you to the bathroom. Closing the door behind you and turning you around to look you in the eyes. 

“How much have you had to drink?” She asks you but you roll your eyes in response. 

“Not nearly enough,” you say as you try to walk around her and out of the door, but she puts her arm out to stop you. 

“I think it is time for you to go home.” She says as she turns around and heads towards the door, expecting you to follow her, but you stand still. 

“No, what are you, my mom? You can’t make me go anywhere.” She turns around towards you and you see the fire in her eyes. She advances towards you until she is so close you can feel her breath on your nose. 

“You wanna bet?” She asks but all you can think about is how close her lips are to yours and your drunken brain spits out, 

“God I really want to kiss you right now.” Apparently, you caught her off guard because she jerks her head back a little and clears her throat. 

“You’re drunk, you need to go home.” You are about to refuse again but she holds up a hand to stop you and adds, “please?” 

“Fine, whatever will make Emily Prentiss happy,” you say, but as soon as you start to walk out of the bathroom you stumble and Emily has to catch you and hold you upright. 

With her hand on your back steadying you, you both make it out of the bar and out to the car. Before you even make it halfway back to your apartment you are passed out, and you don’t really remember much after this. The one thing you do know is that whatever you did for the rest of the night involved Emily. 

\- - - - - - - - - - - - 

You were greeted with harsh lights and a pounding headache. You remember going out with the team for drinks the night before so a hangover this bad can only mean you had way too much to drink. Sadly this isn’t the first time you have partied a little too hard, so you instinctively start to get up and get some Advil and a glass of water. 

When you move to get up though you feel something heavy around your midsection. Looking down you notice it’s an arm, and examining it even further, you realize that it is Emily’s arm. You start to think back through what could possibly have happened last night but your mind is really drawing a blank. 

What is happening? We went out for drinks, I got drunk, and now Emily Prentiss is in my bed. Oh my god, am I wearing clothes? You glance down and notice that you are wearing one of your old t-shirts and a pair of underwear. You glance over at a still sleeping Emily, but with her, under the covers, you can’t tell what she is wearing. 

Automatically your brain jumps to the worst possible conclusion, you and Emily must have slept together. Damn this is not how I wanted it to go. I was supposed to woo her and we would go on dates, not randomly hook up after a night of binge drinking. God what if she wakes up and regrets it. Your mind is moving a mile a minute and you can no longer sit still. Moving out from Emily’s arm you get up and start to pace around the room.

“(Y/N)?” Emily asks, now sitting up in the bed fully awake, “what are you doing? Why are you pacing around the room like a maniac.” She says with a confused look on her face. 

“What happened last night” you quickly ask. A look of understanding comes onto her face. 

“You mean last night when you got wasted and I had to haul your ass to bed.” She asks sarcastically. 

“So nothing happened?” You ask. She gets out of bed and walks over. When she is right in front of you she lifts your chin with her finger and moves in close to your lips. 

“Oh no, I fucked you all night long.” She says seductively. You feel the heat rising in your face and you are suddenly filled with embarrassment but you hear her laughing. 

“Oh come on I am joking. Nothing happened. When we got home you threw up on me so we both had to change clothes, hence why I am wearing your shirt. And then when I went to lay you in your bed, you grabbed my hand and insisted I lay down with you because apparently, you “always wanted to get me in your bed” She says while smirking at you. 

You immediately hide your face in your hands. God if you weren’t embarrassed before you certainly are now. Instead of teasing you more though, Emily reaches up and grabs your hands and pulls them away. 

“You’re not still drunk are you?” She asks, causing you to give her a look of confusion. 

“I don’t think so but I am definitely hungover.” You say. 

“Good,” she says as she lets out a breath of air, “because then I won’t be taking advantage of you when I do this.” and before you can ask what she is talking about you feel her lips on yours. Though slightly taken aback, your body quickly jumps into motion and you find your hands wandering up to play with her hair. Your brain catches up shortly thereafter and causing you to pull away. 

“Wait, but last night you were talking about the boy you liked.” She shakes her head. 

“I never said boy, they just assumed it was a boy.” A look of realization comes onto your face and for what seems like the hundredth time this morning you are filled with embarrassment. Emily gives you a knowing look and a small laugh. 

“Is that why you got so drunk? Because you were jealous?” You look at her sheepishly and nod. She wraps her arms around you and pulls you into a hug. With her lips right next to your ear she says, 

“Don’t worry, I was talking about you, it’s always been you.”


	6. Because Of You

“Hey Em, I see I’ve reached your voicemail again. Please call me back when you can, I am getting a little worried. I love you!” 

You glance at the clock and watch as the little hand slowly moves towards 1 o’clock am. Where is she? You think to yourself as you pace around your living room. Garcia texted you hours ago saying that the team had gotten back safely from the case, so why wasn’t she here yet. Maybe she just got held up with some Unit Chief stuff. Yeah, that must be it. She just got held up with work and her phone must have died. Maybe JJ knows something. 

Dialing the number and putting the phone back to your ear you hear the phone ring once, twice, three times, before JJ finally answers.

“Hey, (Y/N), it’s pretty late to be calling, is everything ok?” You can hear the tiredness in her voice and suddenly feel guilty for calling her so late. 

“Oh my gosh JJ, I forgot how late it is. I feel so bad for disturbing you in the middle of the night like this.” You hear her give a soft chuckle on the other end of the phone.

“Trust me you're fine, Micheal is having a rough night so I was awake anyway. You sound worried, is something wrong with Emily?” She asks. You give a sigh, run a hand through your hair, and sit down on the couch. 

“I was actually calling you to ask you the same thing, she hasn’t made it home yet and she isn’t answering my phone calls. I know you are her best friend on the team, so I guess I was just wondering if you knew if she was ok?”

“As far as I know she left shortly after I did but,” you hear JJ pause and your breath hitches in your throat, “look (Y/N), we all have cases that end up hitting way too close to home. For me and Hotch, it’s any case that involves children, for Morgan it’s the abuse cases, and Reid has a hard time dealing with drug addicts. For Emily, this case was rough. She might just need to get her mind off of it for a bit. I know it’s hard but try not to worry too much about her.” The weight of JJ’s words washes over you. You shoot her a quick thank you, and another apology before hanging up. 

OK, JJ said not to worry so I shouldn’t worry. You try to tell yourself, but you can’t not worry. If Emily is having this hard of a time as JJ said, then why isn’t she coming home. You might not be able to fix anything, but you would think she loves you enough to want to come home when she is having a bad day. You know that if it were the other way around, the only thing you would want to do is come home and cuddle up to your wife. 

Knowing that there was no way that you could go to sleep until you know Emily is home safe and sound, you get up and think of something to do to pass the time and calm your nerves. You figure that there is a good chance that Emily hasn’t eaten, so you go into the kitchen and cook her favorite dinner. 

You are putting the dish in the oven when you hear the front door open and close. Walking towards the door, you see Emily trying to sneak through the living room without making a sound. 

“Welcome home,” You say as you turn on the light, catching her off guard and making her jump. She quickly regains her composure and smiles at you. 

“Hey, I thought you would be asleep by now.” She says as she moves over to you, but you don’t engage. Instead, you walk over and sit on the couch, patting the cushion next to you, indicating for her to come to sit down. She sees the serious look on your face and slowly moves over to sit next to you on the chair. Once she is seated you reach over and grab both of her hands and look her in the eyes. You notice that her eyes are red as if she had been crying.

“Emily talked to me, please.” She breaks eye contact and looks down at your hands. 

“Babe, I don’t know what you mean I am fine. Can we just go to bed?” She asks timidly. 

You reach your hand out to place it on her cheek and she leans into your touch. You gently pull her face back up to where she is looking you in the eyes. 

“Emily I talked to JJ,” You can see the panic fill her eyes, “And she told me about the case.” Suddenly Emily is off of the couch and standing in the middle of the floor.

“You had no right to call her,” she says. But her voice isn’t filled with anger, instead, it is laced with pain. You get up too and walk over to her. 

“Emily I didn’t know where you were and you were ignoring my calls for hours. You don’t think I had a right to be worried?” You see her shoulders hunch over as you wrap your arms around her. You hear her sniffling as she wraps her arms around you as well. 

“Em, please talk to me. I just want to be there for you.” You pull back just enough to look at her face and see tears streaming down her face. You reach up to wipe a few off. “Why was this case so hard?”

“Because of you,” she says so softly that you almost miss it. 

“What?” You cautiously ask. She removes herself from your arms but is still holding your hand as she pulls you back over to the couch. 

“The victims, they were all women who were killed while their partners were gone. The entire time I couldn’t stop thinking that it could’ve been you. I am never here to protect you and I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if something were to happen to you. I was so scared that I would come home and you wouldn’t be here, or worse,” she says as she chokes out a sob.

You wrap your arms around her and pull her to your chest. Typically, situations like this were the other way around, with Emily comforting you, but you knew she needed this right now. After a few moments like this, you kiss Emily’s head and say,

“I am right here and I am fine. Nothing has happened and nothing will happen because I have to be one badass chick to deal with you, Emily Prentiss.” This causes her to let out a small laugh and your heart flutters knowing you’ve alleviated some of her worries. 

She looks up at you and places a soft kiss on your lips. Deepening the kiss, you press your body against hers and end up laying on top of her on the couch. Just as her hand starts to snake under your shirt the oven timer goes off causing you both to jump and let out a small laugh. 

“You cooked?” Emily asks, looking up at you. You blush a little and say

“I figured you would be hungry when you got home.” She leans up and places another lingering kiss on your lips. 

“What did I do to deserve you (Y/N),” she asks. 

“I’m not sure, but it had to be really good.” She laughs. 

“I love you,” she says as she brushes some hair out of your face.

“I love you more”


	7. Superwoman

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning - Slight Sexual Content

You blink the tiredness out of your eyes as you feel the warmth of the sun coming through your window. You stretch out on the king-size mattress and pull the warm covers around you. You hear somebody approaching the bed but you are way too comfortable. You are more than willing to relish in this comfort for a while, but your peace is interrupted as your sides are violently tickled. 

“It’s about time you woke up sleeping beauty,” Emily says while still tickling you. 

“Em...please...stop,” You say between your laughter. She finally ends your assault and you lay back down on your pillow gasping for air as she crawls across the bed towards you laying down facing you.

“Why are you even awake so early,” You ask as you turn on your side to face her. She gives a small shrug and smirks. 

“Maybe I just wanted to watch my beautiful girlfriend sleep.” She says as she gives you a light kiss. 

“Should I be concerned that you watch me like a stalker?” You ask with a giggle. 

“It’s not my fault you’re just so damn gorgeous.” She says as she starts tickling you again. “And that laugh, oh man it just does something to me.” She says laughing along with you. You manage to maneuver out of her grasp and move to where she is laying on her back and you are sitting on top of her. She rests her hands on your hips as you lean down and kiss her. 

“What time is it anyway,” You ask when you break apart. She reaches over and looks at her phone. 

“Half-past seven,” She replies as she shifts and sits up a bit so the two of you are face to face. You wrap your arms around her neck and she runs her hands up and down your back. 

“So what you are telling me is that we are awake before 8 o’clock, on our day off.” Emily smiles at the look of irritation on your face. 

“I’m sorry you're awake so early babe, but I know how to make it up to you.” She says seductively before leaning towards you to attach her lips to your neck. 

“Oh, I think I might like waking up early.” You say breathlessly. Emily has a way of knowing exactly where your sweet spots are. You start to move your hips against Emily’s as her hands find your ass. She flips you over so that she is on top of you and attacks your lips in a possessive kiss. 

Her hand slips under your sleep shirt and caresses the soft skin on your stomach. You let out a gasp and Emily uses this opportunity to deepen the kiss even further. She lets her lips leave you for just a second, as she pulls your shirt over your head. As soon as your shirt is off, she is immediately planting kisses around your chest and down your body. 

The two of you are so caught up in the moment, that you don’t hear her phone vibrating at first. But you finally do after the fourth ring.

“Em,” You pant out while trying to get her attention. She looks up at you but her lips don’t leave your skin. “Babe your phone.” You motion towards the nightstand table where her phone was vibrating.

“Ignore it,” She says as she kisses your lips again and her hands start to play with the top of your underwear. Her phone stops ringing and you think that will be the end of it, but it starts right back vibrating with another call. Emily lets out a groan as you pull away from her and move to grab her phone. Looking at the caller ID you say,

“It’s JJ.” She takes her phone out of your hand and places it face down on the bed. 

“This is my day off, I am not obligated to answer any phone calls from anybody on the team.” You gently push her off of you and look her in the eye. 

“Emily, you know she wouldn’t call you if it wasn’t important. Answer the phone.” She gives you one last lingering look before moving off of the bed and answering her phone 

“Prentiss,” You can slightly hear JJ’s voice on the other end of the phone as you move to put your shirt back on. You see Emily tense up so you move behind her and gently caress her shoulders. 

“JJ, you know this is my day off, I can’t just drop everything and come in.” You reach out and grab the phone from Emily and press it to your ear. 

“Hey JJ, she’s on the way. She’ll be there in thirty.” You hear JJ give you a thank you as you hang up the phone. Emily turns to you with a look of disbelief as you sit back down on the bed. You grab her hand and pull her to where she is standing between your legs. 

“Come on Em, you know they need you.” You force a smile onto your face but Emily sees right through it. She places her hands on your cheeks and you wrap your arms around her midsection. 

“What about you, you need me. We haven’t been able to spend a day together in months.” 

“Emily, you are the closest thing to a superhero I know. You have a job to do, and these people rely on you. At the end of the day, I will always be here.” You finish with a small pained smile on your lips. She bends down and rests her forehead against yours. 

“I promise I will make this up to you.” She whispers to you. 

“I know,” you say with a nod. 

You move back onto the bed and pull the covers around yourself as you watch Emily get ready. She moves slowly and methodically, trying to waste as much time as possible before she has to leave you. Once she has gotten dressed and fixed her hair, she walks back over to you and gives you a long kiss. 

“I can always stay if you want me to.” You look her in the eye and tuck a strand of hair behind her ear. 

“Go, go be superwoman.” You tell her and she starts to walk towards the bedroom door. She gives you one last look over her shoulder that you know is her way of saying I’m sorry. You smile at her and watch as she moves out of your sight. You lay back on the bed and hold one of her pillows close to your chest, as you let the tears finally escape from your eyes. 

“I love you,” you whisper into the air even though you know Emily is long gone.


	8. Sounds Like a Date

Walking over to Emily’s desk you sit the coffee you just got for her right in front of the papers she was looking at. Slightly startled she looks up, confused until she realizes what you set down in front of her. A look of relief and gratitude comes onto her face as she picks up the cup. 

“Thanks (Y/N), I really needed this,” She says as she takes a sip of the coffee. Her eyes widen and she looks at you with surprise. “This coffee is perfect. How do you know how I like it?” You shrug nonchalantly 

“I don’t know I guess I just got lucky” But you know this is a lie. Truthfully, you know all there is to know about Emily. 

You have kind of been a little bit obsessed with her ever since you joined the BAU. It was just something about her that drew your eyes automatically. Not to mention the fact that your crush had gotten significantly worse once you realized that she was a lesbian too. This coffee was just the beginning part of your long thought-out plan to get Emily to reciprocate your feelings. 

“Well, I really appreciate it,” Emily says as she shoots a smile towards you and your heart flutters as a slight blush rises to your cheeks. You are about to start a conversation with her when JJ comes walking in. 

“Hotch said he needs all of us. A case just came in.” With your attention on JJ, you didn't even realize that Emily was no longer sitting at her desk. Instead, you see her walking across the floor towards the blonde. Together they walk towards the round table room leaving you still standing by Emily’s desk and the “perfect” coffee you made still sitting where she left it. 

Feeling defeated, you just stand there and stare at the coffee cup Emily left. Seeing you looking dejected and standing alone, Reid walks over to you and nudges you with his shoulder. 

“Did you know that coffee stays warmer 20 percent longer when cream is added?” You smile at Reid’s fun fact. 

“No, I actually didn’t know that.” Reid continues talking about coffee while the two of you follow Emily and JJ’s path to the round table room. 

When the two of you enter you see that there are two seats left. You and Reid take them, and after you’re sitting down you realize your seat is directly across from Emily’s. Garcia is trying to tell you guys the details of the case but your attention keeps going back to Emily. At one point, she feels eyes on her and looks up to lock eyes with you. She raises her eyebrow at you and you quickly look back down at the notes about the case. The case is local, meaning that you wouldn’t have to fly anywhere, but you all still did have to drive a little while. 

Hotch pairs off people on the team leaving Reid, JJ, and Derek together, Hotch and Rossi together, and you with Emily. As you are all getting up to get ready to head to your cars Emily glances at you and gives you a wink. 

Emily is driving and you are sitting in the passenger's seat. The drive really wasn’t that long, but it felt like an eternity. Emily had turned on the radio to fill the silence, but you honestly didn’t know what to say to her. While trying to figure out how to start the conversation, the responsibility is suddenly taken away from you when Emily clears her throat. 

“I saw you staring at me earlier. What did I have food in my teeth or something?” She says with a laugh. The blush returns to your cheeks. Ok, so she noticed but isn’t totally repulsed. This could be a good sign. With newfound confidence, you look over at her. 

“Nope, I was just staring because you’re beautiful.” Emily looks over at you with a smile. 

“Thank you, I think you’re beautiful too. But really why were you staring at me.” The smile falls off of your face. Wait she called me beautiful but in a friendly way. What does that mean? Does she only like me as a friend or did she just not realize I am flirting, you think. I better try harder.

“I am serious Em, I think you’re really pretty.” Emily looks over at you, her eyebrows furrowed. 

“(Y/N)...” She starts but she is interrupted by your phone ringing. You answer the phone to Garcia telling you about some new information she got. The rest of the ride is spent talking to Garcia until you finally make it to the last crime scene and get to work. 

The case was fairly short, nothing too bad and nothing too gruesome, but it was definitely hard work. You guys worked day and night for 3 days until you caught the unsub. This meant that you haven’t had any time to talk to Emily about the conversation the two of you had in the car. Because it was so much work, everybody decided to get together at Rossi’s for a team dinner. You were getting dressed to head there now. 

You look at yourself in the mirror as you put the finishing touches on your makeup. You don’t usually wear makeup or dress nice but tonight you were going to talk to Emily, confess your feelings, and hopefully, she will say she feels the same. Wearing a nice blouse and your best dress pants, you head out to Rossi’s house. 

When you get there and ring the door, everybody is already there and sipping on their wine. 

“Benvenuta Bellissima,” Rossi says as he walks over and kisses your cheek. “It is about time you got here, good Italian food shouldn’t have to sit.” You laugh at him and apologize. Emily walks up to you and hands you a glass of wine. She leans in close to your ear and whispers,

“I need to talk to you later.” A shiver runs up your spine and you bite your lip. You turn towards her to ask her what about but she is already moving away from you. Following her, you move into the dining room and sit down to dinner. 

Dinner was delicious and it was filled with laughter, jokes, and wine. By the time all of the food is finished the only person still sober was Reid because “One glass of wine a day is good for your heart but multiple can be quite bad for your kidneys”

The entire meal you were stealing glances at Emily but you noticed she never looked at you back. Her eyes were always turned slightly to the left of you at none other than JJ. That could just be nothing though I mean they are best friends they were probably just sharing an inside joke or something. 

As all of you are starting to get up from the table, Emily looks as though she is about to say something but Morgan and Garcia pull you in another direction to get your opinion on some argument they were having. You half-listen to them while also trying to keep your attention on where Emily is but you eventually lose her. Excusing yourself from the bickering best friends you start to try and find Emily. 

After looking in the sitting room, kitchen, dining room, and living room, you start to make your way out to the patio. However on your way you are stopped by Reid. He looks like he has just seen a ghost. 

“Spence are you ok?” He seems to regain his composure a bit but still seems anxious about something. 

“Yeah I am fine, but you probably shouldn’t go out there,” He says motioning towards the patio. You raise an eyebrow at him. 

“Why? Is Emily out there, she said she needed to talk to me?”

“Yes she is but (Y/N) really maybe you should just wait…” But you don’t hear the rest of what he said. I mean what could be so bad that Spence doesn’t want you to see; it's just Emily. You slide open the patio door and start to walk out but you see two figures pressed against each other, attached at the lips, silhouetted by the moonlight. You walk closer until you see them. Emily and JJ. You silently laugh at how silly you must have been to think that she ever could have liked you. 

Apparently, you weren’t as quiet as you thought you were because the two of them jump apart and their eyes dart over to you. A look of guilt flashes on Emily’s face. 

“(Y/N), I’m sorry, I was going to tell you.” You give her a pained smile as you start to turn away. 

“It’s ok Em, I should’ve known. I guess I will just leave you two to it.” You say as you quickly dart back into the house wiping away the tears forming in your eyes. Spencer is waiting for you inside of the house, and as soon as you see him he pulls you into the living room and sits you down on the couch. You collapse into his arms as he pulls you to his chest. 

“I am so sorry, (Y/N). I tried to warn you I really did. If it is any consolation I know exactly how you feel.” You pull back from him a bit and look up at his eyes. You see a longing far away expression in them and the realization hits you like a two-ton truck. 

“You love JJ don’t you?” You ask quietly as you look over at spencer. He gives a small nod before glancing at you. 

“And you love Emily?” He asks you even though he knows the answer. You sigh and nod your head as well. You give a pained laugh and say, 

“And they both love each other.” You feel tears come to your eyes as you feel Reid’s hand intertwine with yours. You look over at him and see what you can only guess is a reflection of the way you both feel.

“Where does that leave us?” he asks quietly.

“In need of some wine and sad movies?” You ask. He looks down and gives you a small smile. 

“Sounds like a date.” He says as he wraps his arm around you and the two of you walk out of the door not saying goodbye to any of your team members.


	9. When You're Ready - Part 1

You are standing outside of Emily's work. It is so intimidating, you have never been here before. You wouldn't even be here now if Emily hadn't been in such a rush this morning. Granted that might have been partially your fault given the fact that you didn't want her to leave your bed. But anyway, she had left her wallet at home so you figured you would bring it to her.

As you step out of the elevator, you see a group of people standing around a desk. The group is made up of a tall lanky man, two blondes, an African American woman, an older distinguished gentleman, and two bulky men. Emily has told you about them, even though you have never had the chance to meet them. You have even seen pictures so you know that these people are Spencer, JJ, Penelope, Tara, Rossi, Luke, and Matt. They glance up at you as you walk in and the perky blonde, Garcia, walks over to greet you. 

"Well hello, beautiful stranger, what brings you to our neck of the woods." You give a small laugh and hold up the wallet that Emily left at home. 

"Em left this at home, I was just bringing it to her." Just as you finish your sentence, Emily walks out of her office and notices you talking to her teammates. A look of panic flashes in her eyes and she rushes over towards you. 

"Hey, (Y/N), what are you doing here?" She asks you. You hold her wallet out to her.

"I thought you might need this, so I figured I would bring it down," you notice the worried look in her eye, "Is something wrong?" You ask. 

"No, nothing is wrong just surprised you're here is all. Thank you." She says as she takes her wallet out of your hand. Looking into her eyes you search for something that she is hiding. You hear Rossi clear his throat and you remember that there are other people in the room. 

"So, Emily are you going to introduce us to this fine young lady?" You blush a little at Rossi's kind words and reach out to shake his hand. You open your mouth to introduce yourself but you are cut off by Emily. 

"This is (Y/N). She is just an old friend who is just staying with me for a while." She says nonchalantly. Your hand falls limp in Rossi's and the smile quickly falls from your face. You glance over at Emily, but it seems like she is looking everywhere except at you. You notice everybody staring so you plaster the smile back on your face and decide to roll with whatever game Emily is playing. 

"Uhm, yeah, my apartment is being fumigated, so Em is letting me use her spare bedroom for a couple of nights." The team gives nods of understanding but before anything else can be said Emily is grabbing your arm and ushering you out. 

"I'm just going to walk her out, I will be right back" She calls over her shoulder towards the group. You throw a quick wave behind you as the team calls out their goodbyes and let yourself be swept away by Emily. Once the two of you are in the elevator you jerk your arm out of hers and glare. 

"Em, what was that?" You ask her. She looks at you like she is surprised by your anger. Ignoring your question altogether she says, 

"I didn't expect you to show up here," She says as she runs a hand through her hair. 

"I didn't know I wasn't allowed to" You respond as you cross your arms over your chest. Emily reaches out and pulls you into a hug. 

"Of course you are allowed to, I just need some warning ok." She gives you a light kiss on your forehead before the elevator opens and she walks you out of the door. 

"See you at home." That was all she said before she turned around and walked back into the building, leaving you standing on the sidewalk stunned and hurt. 

\- - - - - - - - - - - - 

You hear the door click, signaling Emily's entrance. You got off of work hours ago, but instead of spending your time doing something productive, you have been sitting at the kitchen table holding your coffee in your hand, watching as it gets cold. 

"Hey (Y/N), where are you at?" You hear Emily ask as she walks through the apartment. 

"Kitchen," You say back. 

She walks into the kitchen and sees you sitting at the table. Walking over to you she bends down and kisses the top of your head. 

"What's wrong babe, you seem tense." She asks you as she starts to rub your shoulders.

"Did you mean it?" You ask her quietly. You feel her hands stop moving and she moves around to sit at the table with you. Once she is sitting down facing you she asks.

"Did I mean what?" You pull your eyes away from the cold coffee in front of you and force yourself to look at Emily. 

"I am "Just a friend" to you Em?" You see her roll her eyes in response to your question. 

"Come on, you know you're more than a friend that is just what I told the team. So what if they think you're only my friend. It's no big deal." It is those last three words that shoot fire up your spine. No longer able to sit still you get up from the table and walk into the living room. Emily quickly follows you. 

"Are you really upset about this?" She asks you as she reaches out to grab your hand. She pulls you around to face her and she sees the tears starting to brim in your eyes. 

"Yes Em, I am really upset and I thought you would understand that. We have been together for two years Em. Two years. After everything we have been through I thought that the love you had for me was as strong as the love I have for you but you're still referring to me as a friend? I don't want to be your secret Em." 

"Well, what do you want from me?" Emily shoots back, "Maybe I'm not ready to announce it to the world yet." You jerk your hand away from her and walk off towards your shared bedroom. You move towards your closet and grab a duffle bag. Just as you start to pack up your clothes Emily walks in. She notices what you are doing as she is standing in the doorframe. 

"What are you doing?" She asks with worry in her voice. 

"I told you Em, I am not going to be your secret. You say you're not ready? That's fine, I’m not going to force you to do anything you don’t want. But I am ready, and I just can’t be with you right now if you’re not. I am going to give you all of the time you need." After putting the rest of the basics in your bag you grab your laptop and phone charger and push past Emily to head downstairs. 

"Where are you going to go?" She calls after you. You stop dead in your tracks with your hand on the doorknob.

"Maybe I will go stay with a friend," you spit out emphasizing the last word. "You can find me when you're ready." With those last words, you open the door and make your way outside, leaving Emily standing all alone in her living room. After you close the door you pause for a second thinking, what the hell did I just do?


	10. When You're Ready - Part 2

*Emily’s POV*

“Emily what the hell is wrong with you.” I hear Tara yelling at me as I walk towards the jet. “That was probably the stupidest thing you have done the entire time I have known you.”

“It worked though didn’t it,” I say, not turning towards her, instead climbing onto the jet and taking my normal seat. 

This case only took a couple of days. It would’ve been quicker but because I was so preoccupied with my thoughts of my possibly failed relationship I missed crucial details about the unsub. To make it up to the team, and myself, I may or may have walked into the room with the unsub, without a vest on to talk him down. It may have been stupid, but my point still stands, It did work. And now we are on the way back to Quantico. 

“Can somebody else please talk some sense into her?” Tara continues as the rest of the team joins me on the jet. Just by looking at them, I can tell they are all thinking the same thing but they are just too scared or worried to say it. Nobody says anything as we take off but the awkward silence becomes suffocating once we are in the air. 

“I am going to get coffee,” I mumble as I get up and move towards the back of the jet. I hear footsteps following me and look over my shoulder to see JJ. Once we get to the back, I put the pot on for the coffee and turn around to look at JJ’s face. 

“Emily…” She starts but I hold up a hand to cut her off. 

“Don’t JJ, I swear, I don’t need a lecture from you right now.” Her eyes soften and fill with concern. 

“I wasn’t going to lecture you.”

“Oh, sorry I just assumed you would be as mad as the rest of the team.” 

“Emily we aren’t mad, we are concerned. We aren’t stupid we know something is going on. Do you want to tell me about it?” Something about the way she is looking at me makes me feel like a kid who just got caught with their hand in the cookie jar. I feel so guilty for being so consumed in my self-pity that I put myself and possibly the rest of my team in danger. 

“Actually I kind of would,” I say. She gives me a small smile and motion towards the seats closest to the back of the jet for us to sit down. Once we are both seated JJ starts talking. 

“Is it about (Y/N)?” My head jerks up in surprise. Out of all the possible things she could have said, that was not what I expected. 

“What? How did you know that?” She gives a small laugh and rolls her eyes. 

“Come on Emily, you work with profilers, we knew the second you introduced us that she was more than an old friend getting her apartment renovated.” I mentally curse myself for forgetting that small fact. 

“So you know?” I ask her sheepishly. She gives a small nod. 

“Not for sure, but we did have a suspicion.” My shoulders drop and I stare at my hands in front of me to keep the tears from coming to my eyes. JJ grabs my hand and pulls my attention back up to her. 

“Emily you know we won’t think of you any differently. We are all your friends and just want you to be happy, and if a woman makes you happy then who the hell are we to judge.” I smile at her. 

“Thanks for that JJ, but we aren’t happy anymore. After the whole fiasco at work, we fought. I wanted us to stay a secret and she didn’t. She packed her things and left a week ago, said she needed a break.” JJ notices the tears in my eyes and pulls me into a hug. 

“Emily I don’t want to try and tell you what to do but based on how you’ve been acting it is obvious that you are in love with her. I don’t think you should let something like that just walk out of your life.” I nod. 

“Yeah I think you’re right, thank you JJ.” She pats my shoulder one more time before getting up and walking back to her seat. I head back to get my coffee and sit back down with plenty to think about for the remainder of the flight back. 

\- - - - - - - - - - - - 

*Reader POV*

While you are sitting at your desk doing some paperwork your boss asked you to fill out, you hear a familiar ringtone. The one you had specifically set for Emily. You hesitate before you finally give in and pick up the phone. 

“Hello,” You say as you put the phone up to your ear. 

“Hey, (Y/N)” You notice that Emily sounds nervous, kind of like she did the first time she asked you on a date. 

“Em, is there something you needed?” You ask trying to sound mad, but the concern you have for her peaks its way through. 

“Well, yeah, kind of. Look I know you are probably still mad at me but could you please come over tonight around 6? Please?” You pause for a second. You miss Emily so much, but a small part of you is still aching because of the words she said. The larger part of you wins. 

“Ok, I’ll be there later.” You hear her breathe a sigh of relief. 

“Thank you so much, I will see you later tonight.” She hangs up the phone leaving you racking your brain thinking of what she could be doing. 

By the time 6 comes around you are already waiting outside of the apartment. You knock on the door at around 6:01, and Emily opens the door not a second later. She pauses when she sees you and sort of just stares for a second before moving to the side, and motioning for you to come in. Once inside you turn around to face her. 

“Emily I am glad you called. Could we talk about some things?” You ask. 

“Yes of course I think talking is great, but I need to talk first ok?” You notice that she seems eager for something so you just shut your mouth and nod. Grabbing your hand gently she pulls you over to sit on the couch together. Once you are both seated, she interlocks her fingers with yours and looks you in the eyes. 

“(Y/N), I don’t think you understand how difficult this past week has been for me. Without you, it felt like I was spinning out of control and I couldn’t get a grip. You are my rock. I never meant what I said, I don’t think of you as a friend, I think of you as the love of my life. I was scared that as soon as I came out people would treat me differently, but I have realized that it doesn’t matter if the whole world turns against me. As long as I have you I will be ok. I would love it if you could accept my apology and move back in. But if you can’t then I will respect that.” 

You can hear the sincerity in her voice and it tugs at your heart. Lifting the two of your hands you kiss her knuckles. 

“Em, I actually need to apologize as well. I never should have made you feel like your feelings weren’t valid. It is ok to not want to come out yet, and I shouldn’t have pushed you so hard. I want to move back in. And if you still aren’t comfortable then that’s ok, we can be secret for a little longer.” Emily places her hand on your cheeks and pulls your face closer to hers. 

Your lips meet and you immediately melt into the kiss. It may have only been a week but it feels like you haven’t kissed Emily in years, and man does it feel good to be doing it again. Suddenly you hear a knock on the door causing you to jump. Emily gets up to answer the door with an excited look on her face leaving you to wonder what is happening. 

You follow her and as she opens the door you notice the entire BAU team standing in the hallway. You give a small wave and smile at them as Emily tells them all to come in. As the team makes their way in, you move closer to Emily and whisper in her ear.

“What is happening?” All she gives you as a response is a smirk. 

“You’ll see,” She says as she grabs your hand and pulls you towards everybody else. 

“Excuse me, ladies and gentlemen, I know I invited you here for a team dinner but before we eat there is somebody I want to officially introduce you to,” Emily says as she gently tugs your hand, pulling you closer to her. She wraps an arm around your waist causing you to look at her with panic, but you don’t see fear anywhere on her face. 

“This is (Y/N),” She starts, “and she is my girlfriend. We have been dating for two years and I am madly in love with her.” Your mouth had dropped open after she said the word girlfriend but she just looked at you with adoration. 

You hear the team clapping and suddenly feel arms wrapped around your neck. From the smell of bubblegum, you know that it is Garcia. 

“Oh this is so exciting, I get a new girl to hang out with.” The perky blonde says, her arms still wrapped around you. You shoot a glance at Emily for help but she just laughs at your pain. 

“Hate to break up this very sentimental moment,” Luke chimes in, “but I was promised wine and some good food.” This causes the whole team to laugh and make their way to the kitchen. 

You stop Emily before she follows the rest of the team and pulls her into another kiss. She pulls your body closer to hers and you can feel her smiling against your lips. 

“I love you, Emily Prentiss”

“I love you more, (Y/N) (Y/L/N)” She says as the two of you walk into the kitchen to join the bunch.


	11. Save Me - Part 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW - Descriptions of Rape and Torture

*Reader's POV*

“Bye love,” Emily says as she gives you a peck on the lips. You wave bye and watch her head out of the door to go to work. You head back to the bedroom to finish getting ready so that you can go to work as well. You hear the door open up again. 

“Em? Did you forget something?” You don’t hear a response and worry starts to creep up your spine. “Emily?” You call out again before walking out of the bedroom and towards the door. Next thing you know, however, you feel yourself being grabbed by strong arms and a towel placed on your nose. You kick and fight but before you know it your vision is going black and your body goes limp. 

\- - - - - - - - - - - - 

*Emily’s POV*

As I walk into the doors of the BAU I hear my phone ringing. I look at the caller ID and see that it is (Y/N). With a smile, I answer the phone and put it to my ear. 

“Miss me already?” I ask into the phone. But what I hear in response sends chills down my spine. 

“You don’t know how long I have missed you, Lauren.” I freeze where I am standing and nearly drop everything in my hands. 

“Doyle. What did you do to (Y/N)?” I hear him laughing on the other end of the phone. 

“Don’t worry, my love, I haven’t hurt her. I do see why you like her though. She is quite the beauty.” Bile fills my throat and my blood boils. 

“What do you want Doyle? If you want me, you can have me.” I hear him give a tsk tsk. 

“Have you really forgotten how I work Emily? The only thing that I want, is to see you suffer.” After that, he hangs up and I am left stunned. My mind is racing a mile a minute and I can’t even begin to sort the thoughts racing in my head. As I am frozen in place, Hotch walks through the doors and sees me standing there. 

“Emily, is something wrong?” I turn to him and hold up my phone. 

“He has her.” These are the only words that I can get out. Hotch understands though and places his hand on my back walking me towards his office. Once we are in his office he shuts the door and motions for me to sit down. 

“Emily, what is going on?” He asks me. Somehow, I manage to tell him the whole story. How I used to be undercover as Lauren and how Ian Doyle was after me. Finally, I finish with the events that have happened today. 

“He has her right now Hotch. He is going to torture her.” Hotch furrows his eyebrows in worry. 

“And you are sure about this?” I nod my head. “Ok then, starting now this is the only case we are focusing on. Go talk to Garcia, have her see if she can track (Y/N)’s phone and I will get the rest of the team up to speed.” I stand up and start to head out of the door to Garcia’s office. 

“Hey, Emily,” Hotch says as my hand is on the doorknob. “We are going to find her.”

I walk into Garcia’s office, my cheeks stained with tears and my head filled with panic. 

“Emily, what’s wrong?” Garcia asks the second that she notices me. 

“Garcia, can you track (Y/N)’s phone and get me a location?” I tell her, ignoring her question. She turns towards her computer and starts to type something in. 

“Yeah, of course, I can do that, but why am I doing that?” My voice catches in my throat. 

“She’s been taken.” I manage to choke out. Garcia whips around in her seat and looks at me with shock. She immediately is up and her arms are around me as I sob onto her shoulder. 

“Oh Em, we are going to find her. I know it. This whole team is going to work tirelessly until we get her back.” We both hear a knock on the door and turn to see JJ. She looks at me with pity. 

“Emily, you need to come see this.” Pure fear fills my heart as I follow JJ to the roundtable room where the team is gathered around a screen. Everybody looks at me as I enter and Hotch moves towards me. 

“He sent a video.” That was all he had to say before I was pushing past him. On the screen is my girlfriend, bound and gagged to a chair in the middle of the room. I can see the panic in her eyes, as she is staring at somebody or something off-screen. I soon find out what when I see Doyle moving towards her brandishing a knife. 

With the knife he cuts (Y/N)’s shirt and tears it off of her body quickly doing the same with her bra, leaving her exposed. Holding the knife to her neck he gropes at her boobs as she tries with all her might to get as far away from him as possible. 

“Let’s take that gag out of your pretty mouth so they can hear you scream.” I hear Doyle say as he takes the gag out of (Y/N)’s mouth. Taking the knife he traces it along her collarbone pressing just enough to draw blood. She gasps in pain as he moves behind her and looks directly into the camera.

“Say hello to your girlfriend.” He says as he whispers in her ear, “She is going to watch me rape you.” Unable to watch anymore I get up and run to the bathroom, quickly emptying my stomach into the trash can. JJ was there, rubbing my back but it didn’t make a difference. When my stomach is empty I walk over to the sink and splash my face with water. 

“We are going to get him, Emily,” JJ says. I look up at myself in the mirror my face hardening into a sneer. 

“You damn right we are.”

\- - - - - - - - - - - -

*Reader POV*

You aren’t sure how long you have been here. You always see in the movies how people count the number of days using the light from a window, or by counting the number of meals they get. But he doesn’t bring meals, and wherever you are at doesn’t have windows. Even if it did though, the number of times you’ve been unconscious would make anybody lose track of time. 

He’s raped you, beaten you, cut you. Most of the wounds he has inflicted are shallow, but you are not Emly. You didn’t train for this, you aren’t strong enough for this. More than once you have considered giving up, throwing in the towel, and just letting the exhaustion take over. But then you glance up, and see the camera, and remember that you have somebody waiting back home for you. That she is doing everything that she can to fight for you. 

You hear the door close and you know that he is coming back. You hear his slow, methodical footsteps, and try to brace yourself for whatever he is going to do. He walks a few more steps until he is directly in front of you. Crouching down to where the two of you are face to face, he grabs your chin and forces you to lock eyes with him. 

“They are coming. They worked faster than I thought that would.” He takes the knife in his hand and grazes it down your face. “Maybe we should have some fun before they get here” You struggle against your restraints trying to get away but it’s no use. He laughs as he sees you struggle and holds the knife up to your neck.

“You know what, I actually think that we can let you out of these restraints.” He uses the knife to release your hands and feet and tips the chair over so you collapse into the floor. He moves over to stand over you and suddenly you are hit with a burst of adrenaline. You turn over, grab the legs of the chair, and swing as hard as you can to the back of his head. 

He staggers a bit as you push yourself up from the floor and stumble over to try and open the door. To your horror, it is locked and no matter how hard you try it won’t budge. Suddenly your arm is being grabbed and you are whipped around and thrown against the wall, Doyle’s hand around your neck. 

“You shouldn’t have done that bitch.” Before you realize what is happening you feel a red hot pain in your abdomen. Then it is gone, and back again in an instant. Your legs turn into pins and needles and you can no longer hold yourself up. Falling to the ground your hearing starts to fade and your vision goes black. 

\- - - - - - - - - - - -

*Emily’s POV*

We have a whole team of swat with us. We pull up to the warehouse and I immediately jump out and head to the door. The only thing stopping me from running in there is Morgan, who catches up to me and stops me. 

He motions for swat to get ready to go, and they enter first me and Derek close behind. The warehouse hallway leads to a door. Morgan holds his hand up signaling for me to stop. On the count of three, the two of us bust into the room guns drawn and the sight I see sends chills to my core. 

Doyle is sitting in the chair that (Y/N) was sitting in last time I watched the video. Next to the chair is her lifeless body, half-naked laying in a pool of blood. 

“Nice to see you again, Lauren. Your little girlfriend broke the rules so she had to pay. You can arrest me, but make no mistake, you are too late.” Morgan moves forward and yanks Doyle out of the seat, placing handcuffs around him as I rush over to her body. I check her pulse and it is so faint that it is barely there. 

Placing my hands over the stab wounds, I try talking to her to coax her awake

“Hey baby, hey we made it. I am here, we got Doyle. You’re gonna be ok, I promise.” I see her eyelashes flutter and her attention turns to me for a second before her eyes close back. A silent and painful sob rips through my throat as I watch the love of my life slowly slipping away.

\- - - - - - - - - - - -

*Reader Pov*

Beep...beep...beep

You slowly open your eyes to a blinding light and the smell of sterilization. You notice that your whole body hurts as you try to sit up and look around to get a feel for where you are. 

“Hey Woah, calm down, try not to move ok” Emily rushes over to you when she sees that you are awake and gently keeps you laying down. 

Looking at her makes all of the memories of the last couple of days rush back in an instant. When Emily sees you starting to panic, she takes your hand in hers and rubs the back of it with her thumb, reminding you that you are safe and no longer with Doyle. 

“What did he do to me?” You ask but your voice comes out in a hoarse whisper. 

Emily stares at you for a second and you notice the pain in her eyes when she thinks about it. Instead of answering your question she gets up and gets you some water. After she helps you drink it, and is sitting back down, is when she finally answers you.

“He cut you and hit you, but all those wounds are superficial.” She pauses and tears start to fall from her eyes. “He raped you, and when we found you you had to stab wounds in your abdomen. I am so sorry this is all my fault”

At this point the tears are freely flowing down her face, she’s not even trying to stop them. You tug her hand and she looks up at you. You try your best to move over in the bed a little bit without causing yourself any pain and motions for her to lay next to you. She carefully lays on the bed next to you in the small space you have created and you lean against her.

“It’s not your fault,” is all you can say, and you hope that she understands. Whatever painkillers they have you on kick in again and you feel yourself drifting back off to sleep, but before sleep overcomes you you say,

“I knew you’d save me”


	12. Catatonic - Part 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Despite the different names, this chapter is a part two to the last one. 
> 
> TW - Mentions of torture

It felt like everything was moving in slow motion, yet all too fast. Ever since you have been in the hospital everything has gone by in a blur of people coming in and out, needles sticking you, and x rays being done. The only constant was her. Emily. 

“You are being discharged today,” she says. You are sitting on the hospital bed, Emily standing at the end of the bed watching you carefully. You give her a small smile and nod your head, acknowledging that you heard her. 

She walks over towards you and sits on the bed next to you. Her hand snakes around your waist but you don’t lean into her like you usually would. 

“(Y/N), are you ok? If something is wrong, I can talk to the doctors and they can keep you for observation.” She sounds concerned. You turn your head to look at her and shake your head. 

“I am ok.” You try to put some power behind it to ease her fears, but it comes out as a whisper. She looks at you with analyzing eyes for another second before kissing your temple and getting up. She walks out of the room, presumably to get the discharge papers, leaving you alone again with nothing to do but sit, and think, and watch the time creep by. 

\- - - - - - - - - - - - 

You’ve been home for a couple of days now, though you aren’t sure how long. A week maybe. Emily is with you, the two of you were staying together before this happened anyway so it only makes sense. Hotch gave her time off from work so she could help you, keep you from reopening your stitches, or something like that. Not like that would even be a problem. This whole time you’ve been borderline catatonic. Like a zombie, you go through the daily motions but not much more. 

You feel bad for Emily. She is bending over backward for you. Cooking for you, helping you bathe, keeping you company. You feel like such a burden but you just can’t seem to get out of this stupor. Between Emily and the team, everybody has tried, even going so far as to ask your doctor for help, but he said that this sometimes happened in cases like this. 

When a victim, god you hated that word, goes through something traumatic the mind tries to find anything it can to cope. The only thing that they could do was be there for you, and try to get you back to any old activities you liked. 

“I was thinking we could have pizza for dinner, I am not sure I feel like cooking.” You hear Emily say as she walks into the living room. She sees you sitting on the couch staring into space and her face fills with concern. 

“How are you feeling babe? Are you hurting anywhere?” You shake your head. 

“We could walk to the Pizza place down the road if you’re up to it.” She says, but again you shake your head. 

“That’s ok, we don’t have to walk, we can drive.” You finally look into her eyes. 

“Em, I just don’t really feel like it.” You say to her. She runs a hand through her hair and looks at you. 

“Honey, the doctors said it’ll help if you try and get back into normal life. I think this could help.” 

“I don’t need help Emily, I am fine.” You insist even though you know it isn’t true. Emily put her hand to her temple in frustration. 

“Can you please stop lying to me? I am trying to be there for you but I can’t if you won’t let me.” Her voice is strained and you can tell it is taking everything in her to stay calm. You feel guilty for putting all of this pressure on her and your instinct is to push her away. 

“I don’t need you to be there for me Em. You can leave if you want.” You can see something flash in her eyes. 

“(Y/N), you were tortured,” You cringe inwardly as she says it, “I hate to be so blunt but it’s true. He did unspeakable things to you, yet you are sitting here like you are perfectly fine. You are allowed to not be ok, you are allowed to feel things. Dammit, stop acting like none of it affected you because I know you’re lying.” By the end of her rant, her voice has raised in volume and she is almost yelling. Trying to calm her down and regain control of the conversation you apologize. 

“I am sorry, I will try to be better tomorrow,” You say as you look down at the floor and curl yourself further into a ball on the couch. 

Emily sighs, and walks over to you, kneeling down in front of the couch. She reaches out and places a hand on your knee and in a voice much softer than the one she was just using she says, 

“I don’t want you to be better tomorrow. I want you to talk to me today, right here right now. Tell me what you are feeling.” You shrug. 

“I will be fine,” You respond. She gets up from her position in front of the couch and instead moves to sit next to you. She wraps her arm around you pulling you into her side. She kisses the side of your head. 

“Can I tell you what I am feeling?” She asks in a whisper. You give her a small nod of your head. 

“I feel like my girlfriend won’t even look at me because she is afraid I see her differently. I feel like she is pushing me away and suffering in silence because she doesn’t want to burden me. And I feel my heart breaking every time you lie to me and tell me you are fine when clearly you are not. I am here for you now, I will be here for you tomorrow, and I will be here for you until the end of time if you will just let me in.” Her words struck something deep inside you and suddenly you can no longer hold it together. 

The tears congregating at the back of your eyes start streaming down your face as you let Emily rock you back and forth. She is rubbing your back and whisper affirmations in your ear. Your body is shaking with sobs, this is the first time you have cried since it happened, and everything that you’ve built up is finally coming out. You are not sure how long the two of you sit there like that, but Emily holds you until the tears stop. 

“I’m sorry Em,” You squeak out, feeling like your voice is going to give out “I don’t know how to deal with this.” She takes your face in her hands and wipes the remaining of your tears from your cheeks. 

“I’m not sure either, but I know you don’t have to deal with it alone. I will be by your side every step of the way.”


	13. Let it Burn

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Heavily influenced by Season 14 Episode 10

You stand outside of her door, wiping the sweat off of your hands. Finally gaining the courage you need, you ring the doorbell and wait. You hear shuffling inside of the apartment as you wait patiently for your date. After a few moments, she finally opens the door.

God, she is beautiful, you think when you look at her. Unlike you, she is not dressed up. Her hair is pulled into a messy and she is wearing a t-shirt and sweatpants. Yet somehow she makes it work.

"Hi," She says when she notices you staring. You clear your throat and glance at your watch playfully.

"Sorry I didn't realize I was early." You say with a smile. She looks down at her clothes and blushes a bit.

"No, sorry it's me I am running way behind schedule. Please come in." She opens the door wider and motions for you to enter. You smell something cooking and make your way into the kitchen, Emily following after you.

"Emily, this smells fantastic," You say as she enters the kitchen behind you, "But I thought I said I wanted to take you out tonight." She grimaces a bit and tucks a stray strand of hair behind her ear.

"I know, but I wanted to surprise you." You smile and give a small laugh as you look at the small mess she has made of the kitchen. Turning back to her you grab her hand.

"Well, I am surprised." She smiles back at you and blushes slightly.

"Good, great. Well, I am going to go change." She says as she starts to walk towards her bedroom. "Make yourself comfortable, make yourself a drink, and I will be right back."

Once she has gone into her bedroom and closed the door you move over to get yourself a drink. After pouring yourself a glass of wine you make your way to the kitchen table. While waiting, you hear her talking on the phone. You don't want to be nosey so you try not to snoop on her conversation, but you vaguely hear her saying something about cooking wine.

She comes back out not long later and she heads straight to the stove. Picking up the spoon she was cooking with, she tastes whatever was in the pot. Turning towards you she gives you an apprehensive look.

"Everything ok?" You ask her.

"How do you feel about pizza?" She says as she gives you a shy smile.

\- - - - - - - - - - - -

"Just for the record, I would have been perfectly fine eating whatever you were cooking over there." You say. The two of you had ended up ordering pizza, and now you had both eaten you were lounging on her couch.

"Thank you," she says with a laugh, "but this would have been a pretty bad first date if I had poisoned you." She says, causing you to join in on her laughter.

"I appreciate you having my back. And this is nice, I am glad that we finally got to do it." You notice her glancing down at her hands, in embarrassment? Guilt? You reach over to grab her hand causing her to look up at you.

"I am going, to be honest, I was starting to think you were trying to get out of it." Her face fills with a surprised look.

"What makes you say that?" You give her a sarcastic yet playful look.

"Come on, you called me, what, five times to reschedule."

"Hey, those cases were real." She says with mock anger. You hold your hands up in surrender

"Hey I know, It just got me thinking. We bonded when your team helped us out on a case. Then I realized, you see cases like that all the time. Why would someone like you, need to make time for a date with someone like me." The two of you are looking at each other, her hand still in yours. Emily seems to have something that she wants to say, but she doesn't know how to say it. She gives up on whatever thought she was trying to form and clears her throat.

"Speaking of, how are you healing?" She changes the subject.

"I'm doing good," You say, "I get to go back into the field next week so I am pretty healed. Still trying to get used to the scar though." She nods her head in understanding.

"Well, if you don't have any scars, have you really lived?" She says. We lock eyes and share a moment of understanding for a moment. Suddenly her phone vibrates, breaking the moment.

"Sounds like someone at the BAU really wants your attention." You try to lighten the mood and sound playful but you're not sure that it works.

"Yeah, it does." Emily is still looking at you, her eyes apologizing even though her mouth hasn't said anything. You give her a reassuring smile.

"It's ok, I understand." You say as you get up from the couch, Emily following suit. You walk to the door while Emily follows you. Once you are standing in the doorway you turn back to her. "I enjoyed myself, Emily. Hopefully, we can do this again."

She gives you an apologetic look before pulling you into a hug. You savor this moment, hoping that it isn't your first and last date. Pulling away you give her one last smile before walking out of her apartment and back to your car.

\- - - - - - - - - - - - -

It had been a week since your last date with Emily. You know she is on a case, so she hasn't even been in town, but you can't help feeling like she doesn't want to see you again. You have sent each other a couple of text messages throughout the week, just basic things like asking about how you are, but that is all the communication you have had. Until one day, when you get a call inviting you to breakfast.

You walk up to the familiar door and ring the doorbell. Instead of waiting for her like last time you hear her call out that the door is open, so you walk in. Your nose leads you into the kitchen, where you see Emily bent over checking something in the oven. God, she looks good, you think to yourself. Once she is done she stands up and turns around smiling at you.

"Contrary to previous experience I can actually cook," She says. You give her a mock look of surprise.

"Oh wow, I was looking forward to some leftover pizza," you say, causing her to laugh. You notice that she seems nervous and that she is fidgeting with her hands.

"Your instincts were correct," She blurts out.

"About what?" You ask caught off guard, and slightly confused.

"About those times before," she says. "I was blowing you off. I did have to work but I would have made the time and the truth is it's just hard in this line of work to get close to someone. And maybe I have some scars that haven't totally healed." The whole time that she is talking she has been moving closer to you. By the time she has finished, she is standing less than a foot in front of you.

"Well," you say, reaching out to interlace her fingers with yours, "Somebody pretty wise once told me a person who doesn't have any scars hasn't lived." She blushes at your words and glances down at your lips. The tension in the room has gotten so thick that you feel like you could suffocate.

It feels like a magnet is drawing the two of you to each other as both of you start to lean towards each other. The two of you are now so close that you can feel her breath grazing across your lips, but you are interrupted by the timer on the stove going off. The two of you jump back a bit and you clear your throat.

"I think the food is done," You say glancing towards the stove. However, Emily's eyes haven't left you.

"You know what?" She says as she places her hand on your check, directing your attention back to her, "Let it burn."

She leans in and suddenly her lips are on yours. Your hands find her hips and sparks fly as the two of you finally connect. You pull her body flush against yours and her hands find their way into your hair. When you finally have to breathe, the two of you break apart.

You see her turn her nose up at the smell of the food getting a little overdone in the oven, causing you to laugh. She joins shortly after.

"Maybe we could order a pizza?"


	14. Goodbye Kiss

You stand at the door of your office, looking at your desk for one of the last times. Slowly moving further into the room you grab a cardboard box provided to you and start carefully putting your things into boxes. You hear somebody knock on the door, but you don't acknowledge it. You don't need to, you already know who it is. You expected her. By now the whole team probably knows and it would only make sense for it to be her to come and talk to you.

"You're leaving?" She asks you as you hear her moving further into the room. You finally pause with your back towards her. You don't respond because you are afraid your voice would betray you and show your emotions. Wiping the stray tears that have fallen from your eyes, you nod your head.

"You can't," She says. Her voice sounds determined yet timid. You turn around to her and look at her for the first time since she came in. Her eyes are red as if she is trying to hold in tears.

"I don't really have a choice, Emily." You say with a shrug to try and seem like it doesn't bother you, but she sees right through it.

"Have you talked to Hotch?" She asks you with her arms crossed over her chest.

"Hotch tried but you know how Strauss is," You reply. 

He really did try. After you had turned down the job offer, he backed your decision to stay one hundred percent. He was even in the meeting that you had with Strauss, trying to convince her that you were needed at the BAU. But nothing could get her to change her mind.

"What about Garcia, can't she hack something to make you stay?" Her voice is desperate and her eyes are darting around the room as if she were looking for something that could give her an answer.

"I wouldn't dare ask her to risk her job doing that." You say looking at her. Her eyes stop fidgeting and they finally land on yours. Both of you pause for a second before Emily takes a deep breath and walks closer to you.

"Where will you be going?" She asks you quietly, her voice barely above a whisper.

"Los Angeles," You respond looking down at the floor. You don't want to see her reaction.

"All the way across the country?" Her voice cracks and hearing her raw emotion brings the tears rushing right back to your eyes. You give her a small nod, eyes still glued to your feet. You feel her moving towards the desk you are leaning on. You glance up at her to see that she has picked up a picture that you had just packed up.

"I don't want you to leave," her eyes are watery now, as she looks longingly at the photo.

"Trust me I don't want to leave either. We just got you back and we were finally whole again." You move towards her to see which photo she is looking at. When you get close enough to see it you silently laugh at the memory. It's a picture of you and Emily laughing that JJ had taken at one of Rossi's parties.

"What are we going to do without you?" Emily ask as she glances over at you

"The team will survive you, guys are tough" You respond gently nudging her arm. She puts the picture down and turns to face you directly. She grabs your hand and pulls you closer to her.

"What am I going to do without you?" She asks while giving you the most intense look you have ever seen. Her hand moves to wrap around your waist and she gently leans towards you. You feel your breath catch in your throat as you feel her lips gently brush against yours as if asking for permission. When you don't pull away, Emily closes that last little bit of distance between the two of you.

You start to relax into the kiss, after all this is all you have wanted for quite some time now. But you pull away when you remember the circumstances. You pull yourself out of Emily's grip and move to the other side of the room, hoping that some distance will squash all of the feelings she just ignited in you.

"I'm sorry, I know I shouldn't have done that and I know..." Emily says frantically, clearly assuming that she has done something wrong but you cut her off.

"Dammit Emily," you say as you run your hands over your face.

Emily starts to walk over to you still uttering apologies that are not needed. When you feel her presence right behind you, you turn around and place your hand gently over her mouth to get her to stop talking.

"You have the absolute worst timing." You tell her before pressing your lips back against hers.

The last kiss was gentle and soft, but this one is hard and passionate. Emily's hands find your hips and pull your body flush against hers, as your hands drift up to cup her cheeks. She runs her tongue across your bottom lip seeking entrance, that you gladly give her. She releases a content moan as your tongues dance together. Your head is cloudy, but all you know is that you want to feel her skin.

While still locked in your heated embrace, you take off Emily's blazer, and your hands drift up under her shirt. Her head falls back in a moan, breaking the kiss, as she feels your hands graze over the warm skin of her stomach. Your lips move to attack her neck. You would've loved to have taken it further, but suddenly you hear a door slam somewhere down the hall, bringing both of you to your senses.

You pull away from the kiss, but Emily still has her arms wrapped around you, holding you close. The two of you stand there for a second, relishing in the few moments that you have together.

"I have to be out of the office by the end of the day." You say gently. Emily gives you a small and sad nod of understanding before the two of you untangle from each other.

Together, the two of you finish packing up your stuff in silence. Neither one of you said anything. The only noises that you could hear were the occasional sniffs that came from each of you, and the people outside of the office going about their lives. When the last of your possessions have been packed up, you and Emily just stare at each other.

Slowly Emily walks towards you and pulls you into a hug. Her fingers are digging into your shirt as if her holding on could keep you from leaving.

"You have to promise me you will come back," She says through tears.

"I'll do what I can," You respond.

The two of you pull away and you place a small goodbye kiss on her lips, before grabbing your boxes and walking out of the office and the BAU for the last time. Leaving the team, and more importantly, Emily, behind.


	15. Can I Kiss You?

You always hear people say, cases with children are the worst. But that isn’t entirely true. Cases where adults are killing children, yeah those are pretty fucked up. But what’s worse is when a child is killing other children.

“We believe our unsub is a 15 yeard old male.” Hotch starts the debrief.

“He most likely feels that many people at his school have wronged him or abandoned him, so now he has to get revenge,” Reid says next.

“He is overlooked in his personal life and probably feels like he has nobody to rely on. This means he has nothing to lose and is willing to make the ultimate sacrifice.” There goes Morgan.

“There is a good chance that he is planning to do something more drastic, like a school shooting or bombing, so local schools should be on the lookout for anybody acting differently or suspiciously.” Emily chimes in.

“He most likely has anger issues that can get out of control and make him dangerous. But at the same time, he is just a confused and hormonal teenage boy. If at all possible try to talk him down before resorting to violence.” You finish off.

“Alright, let us know if you find anything,” Hotch says before all of the local cops disperse.

You don’t usually go with the team when they have a case. You were brought on as extra help when it comes to child psychology. Most of the time you stay back at Quantico with Garica, but right from the beginning, they knew that the unsub they were dealing with was a child, so you came with them as some extra help.

You move back into the room you guys have set up and are working out of, to see Reid plotting points on a map and Emily sitting at the table on the phone with Garcia.

“Hey Garcia,” Reid says as you move over to sit next to Em. “We know that he is working out of this relative area, but we don’t know what school he is from. Are there any big events happening at any of the schools here?”

Emily smiles at you as you look over at her, and she reaches over to grab your hand. This isn’t uncommon for you two considering how quickly the two of you became best friends.

“Got something boy wonder,” Garcia says over the speaker, “Williams High School is having a pep rally today at 3 o'clock. Not only that but all of the victims have some sort of connection to the school.” The three of you perk up when Garcia finishes.

“That has got to be it, he is going to do something during the pep rally,” Emily says frantically. The three of you make your way out of the room and go to tell the rest of the team.

\- - - - - - - - - - - -

It is 3:05 when you, the rest of the team, and the local PD pull up outside of the school. Rushing inside you guys gather any stragglers who haven’t made it to the pep rally yet and get them outside of the school. By the time you get to the gym, you notice that everybody is quiet except for one voice.

“You guys will notice me now. Everybody will notice me now!” says the voice inside the gym.

“Hotch he has a bomb,” Morgan says after peeking his head inside. “We can’t go in with guns drawn or the whole room will go up.” Hotch nods at this and then looks over at you.

You notice the look in his eye and hand your gun to him. Clearing your throat you open the gym doors and move slowly inside.

“What is she doing?” You hear Emily shouting behind you, but you don’t turn around.

“She has to talk him down, you know she’s the best one for this Em,” Morgan responds to her. You hear her struggling and assume that Morgan is holding her back. But all of the noise is drowned out by the pounding in your ears as you walk towards the unsub.

When he notices you he quickly turns towards you holding up the detonator for the bomb in one hand, and a gun in the other. He points the gun towards you, his finger on the trigger as if daring you to give him a reason to pull it.

“Hey, it’s ok,” You say to him as you slowly move closer, “I am not armed, and I am not here to hurt you.” Your voice is soft and cautious.

“Prove it,” he says, and you start to hear the fear in his voice. He doesn’t want to die. You hold up your hands and gently take off your vest showing him that you do just want to help him.

“I know how you feel,” You start to say to him, as he slowly aims the gun towards the floor.

“You do?” He asks, his voice broken. You nod your head.

“You feel like you are alone, and this is your only option, but I promise you it isn’t. I can help you.” You are close enough that you can reach out and grab the gun from him, so you slowly raise your hand to get it. He looks as if he is about to give it to you when one of the kids in the bleachers gets up and tries to run out of the gym.

This makes him mad, and you see him aim his gun at the kid. Instinctively you grab his wrist and tackle him, causing the gun to go off.

The team rushes in when they hear the gunshot and you notice Morgan rush over to the boy with his gun drawn. You watch as he cuffs him, before moving to get up and feeling an intense burning sensation in your abdomen. Reaching down to where it hurts, you draw your hand back and see your fingers covered in blood.

Emily rushes over to you, as the rest of the police force escorts the students and teachers out of the gym.

“Oh my God, (Y/N).” You hear Emily say. Looking up at her you see that there are tears in her eyes.

“Em, I am fine. It’s good.” You say trying to calm her down. You feel her putting pressure on the wound, causing you to wince in pain. You are feeling lightheaded and your vision is going fuzzy, but you force yourself to focus on Emily. You focus on her eyes, slightly filled with panic yet Her touch, gentle yet firm. Her voice strained yet soft. You focus on her until you can’t anymore.

\- - - - - - - - - - - -

Waking up, you immediately search for her. You don’t have to look far because she is sitting right next to you holding your hand. She hasn’t noticed that you are awake yet, so you gently squeeze her hand. Her head snaps up to look at you. You give her a soft smile causing her to break out into a smile as well.

“I was so scared,” She says to you, your hand still clasped in hers.

“I told you I was fine, and we both know I am always right,” You try to make a joke, but as you laugh you feel your stitches pull and instead you grimace. Seeing this Emily moves closer to you.

“I’m serious, (Y/N), I was afraid I wasn’t going to get the chance to tell you…” She trails off while looking into your eyes.

“Tell me what?” You ask, trying to coax her into saying what you hope she was thinking.

“I think I am in love with you,” She says as she looks down at your intertwined hands, “and I don’t know what to do.” She glances up at you, trying to gauge your reaction. You do your best to sit up, and Emily puts her hand on your back to help you. Once you are sitting up you place one of your hands on Emily's cheek, and she gently leans into your touch.

“Em, I think I am in love with you too.” Her face fills with shock at first, clearly, she wasn’t expecting your answer, but then the biggest smile comes onto her face. She pulls you towards her and envelops you in a tight hug. You pull back and are face to face with her close enough to smell the coffee on her breath.

“Can I kiss you?” She asks, softly. You bite your lip and nod. Her lips are on yours, gentle, soft, and warm. No amount of drugs they give you could compare to what you are feeling right now. When the two of you break apart, you feel bubbly and happy, both of you devolving into a fit of giggles. Once you’ve regained your breath, Emily grabs your hand again.

“Will you go out on a date with me?” She asks you, her smile never leaving her face.

“I thought you’d never ask.”


	16. Oblivious

“Shit,” you say as you drop the files you had in your hand. You bend over to grab them when you hear somebody walking over to you. Emily bends down next to you to help you pick up the papers. 

“Thanks, Em,” you say to her. 

“No problem, (Y/N), with an ass like that I would do anything for you,” Emily says, a cheeky smile on her face. 

“Thank you.” You respond to her, “I got these jeans from this cute new boutique and they do wonders. We should go shopping together sometime, we could get you a pair too!” You say with enthusiasm that Emily doesn’t seem to match. The two of you finish picking up the files and stand back up. Emily gives you a weird look, but you disregard it. 

“We have a case,” JJ says as she walks by. You and Emily glance at each other before making your way to the roundtable. After Garcia tells you all about the details, you guys get on the plane and head to where the case is. 

“Ugh I can handle a lot of stuff but this is brutal.” You say as you sit on the jet, looking at the crime scene photos. All of the victims have been brutally mutilated, and to make matters worse, the oldest of them was only 15.

“Are you ok?” Emily asks as she looks over to you. 

“Yeah I mean I am good it’s just, ugh I think I might have nightmares.” You say with a grimace. Emily gets up from her seat and moves over to you. She sits next to you and places her hand on your knee, giving you a reassuring look. 

“In adults nightmares are pretty rare. Only about 8 percent of adults claim that they have frequent nightmares.” Reid says as he looks over at the two of you. “So despite what we see all of the time you are more likely to have a peaceful dream.” You playfully roll your eyes at him. 

“What would I do without Dr. Reid. Now I can dream peacefully.” Emily gives you a small laugh. 

“Speaking of dreams,” she says as she leans closer to you, her voice dropping to a whisper and her hand caressing your knee. “I had a dream about you the other day.” 

“Oh that reminds me,” you blurt out, “I had the wildest dream about the entire team the other day. So basically we were all at Rossi’s place and…”

“I am sure that it was an interesting dream (Y/N), but we are about to land,” Hotch says. 

\- - - - - - - - - - - -

You guys have been working the case for a couple of days now, and you were starting to feel it. Sitting inside at the desk, going over details about the case all day every day was starting to make your body ache. 

Right now, you and Emily were the ones that are stuck with the desk job because JJ was talking to the families, Reid and Morgan were talking to the M.E., and Hotch and Rossi were at the crime scenes. 

“Ugh, my muscles are so tense.” You say as you stretch out in your seat. Emily walks over behind you and starts to massage your shoulders. She bends down and her mouth is right next to your ear. 

“You know I could help you relax and unwind,” she says. Feeling her breath on your ear makes you shiver, but you relax into her touch. 

“Oh my goodness Em, you should be a masseuse,” You say as your eyes drift close. She lets out a small laugh.

“These hands are all yours.” She says in your ear again. 

“Emily I bet you are tense too, we should have a spa day.” You say, but suddenly, her hands are no longer on your shoulders and you startle a little at the loss. She moves away from you and goes to sit back down at the other end of the table. 

“Yeah, sure.” She looks through the papers in front of her that she has looked through a dozen times already. You start to ask her what is wrong when a police officer walks in. 

“He’s killed another girl,” He says, effectively switching the mood. You and Emily get up, and head to the new crime scene. 

\- - - - - - - - - - - -

After his last kill, he got sloppy. Your team caught him that same night. It was so late that by the time you guys got back on the jet to go home, half of the team was asleep before the jet even took off. 

Halfway through the ride, you notice that Emily is the only other person on the jet still awake. You walk over to her and sit in the seat across from her. When you sit down, she looks up from her paperwork and gives you a small smile. 

“You still want to have that spa day this weekend?” You ask her. She looks at you apprehensively before shaking her head and looking back down at her papers. 

“I don’t think I should.” You roll your eyes at her and reach across to playfully hit her arm. 

“Come on Em, it’ll be fun. We can invite Garcia and JJ if you want, it could be like a girls' night.” 

“I don’t want to invite JJ and Garcia, I don’t want to make it a girls' night, and frankly I don’t want to keep getting my hopes up just for you to knock them back down again.” She responds to you while never taking her eyes off of the papers in front of her. 

“Emily, what are you talking about getting your hopes up.” You ask genuinely confused. 

“It’s obvious that in your eyes we're only friends and I am ok with that. I just don’t want to continue to get my hopes up.” You blink a little as her words are processing in your brain. Does Emily want to be more than friends? You reach over and grab the papers out of her hands forcing her to look at you. 

“Hold on Em, I didn’t even know you wanted to be more than friends.” She gives you a look that says ‘are you kidding me?’. 

“You can’t be serious right now?” She asks you.

“I am dead serious, how was I supposed to know you liked me?” You are starting to get a little irritated, but Emily is doing the exact opposite. In fact, she starts to laugh. “What are you laughing at?” You ask her as you sit back and cross your arms. 

“(Y/N), you seriously didn’t know I was flirting with you?” She asks. “This whole time, the touching, the double entendres, and suggestive things I said?” You sit there for a second thinking back on all of the interactions you have had with Emily for the past couple of weeks. Suddenly it hits you like a boulder. 

“You were flirting this whole time??” You nearly shout. Emily is still softly giggling at your obliviousness. 

“I don’t know how you didn’t notice. Everybody else could see it, I am pretty sure they had a bet on how long until I admitted my feelings for you.” You feel like such an idiot, but after taking a second to make everything make sense, you start laughing along with Emily.

“Wow. Well, if it means anything, I like you too. And if I had known you were flirting, I totally would’ve asked you out by now.“ you say once you’ve calmed down from laughing.

“We could still have that spa day, and I could show you how well we could relax,” Emily says with a smirk that makes you feel all bubbly inside. You blush and bite your lip. Emily starts to lean towards you as her hand moves to the back of your head. Your lips are a half-inch away when you hear a whistle. 

Emily lets out a groan as you both look over and see Morgan and Spencer watching you.

“You guys are supposed to be asleep,” Emily says, annoyance lacing her voice. 

“Well, the two of you aren’t exactly the quietest people on the jet.” Reid chimes in. Morgan nudges Reid with his elbow. 

“You owe me 20 bucks, pretty boy.” You watch as Spence takes a twenty out of his wallet, causing you to laugh and Emily to roll her eyes. She looks back at you. 

“Told you they were betting.” She whispers. You just shake your head and finish closing the distance between you two. You hear Morgan make some sort of remark, but you don’t care. All that is on your mind is Emily, and the spa day you knew you were going to enjoy.


	17. Quarantine

You didn’t think that having to quarantine was going to affect you that much. I mean you work for the FBI, obviously you are essential. So that means you have to go to work every day just like before. I mean, you do have to limit your travel and now you only take one case a month, but you expected stuff like that to happen. 

What you didn’t expect was how quickly things started to get boring. The team could no longer go out together and you now had more time off, which meant you spent every weekend by yourself. 

Hotch goes home to Jack, JJ has Will and the boys, Garcia has Kevin, Derek has Savannah, Rossi has Krystal, and Reid has made it perfectly clear how content he is with his books. That just leaves you and Emily the only ones who go home alone at the end of the day. Well, hopefully not for long. 

“We should move in together,” You say to Emily one day at work. 

“Come again?” she questions with her eyebrows raised. 

“You and I should move in together for the rest of quarantine.” She gives you a blank stare. “Come on Em, we both live alone and we both know Sergio is lovely but he doesn’t replace a human being. It might be nice for us both to have some company.” You say, giving her puppy dog eyes that you know Emily can’t resist. Her resolve quickly weakens. 

“Fine, we can move in together.” You give a little squeal and pull her into a hug. 

“This is going to be so fun. Ok so I will bring my stuff to your apartment tonight and move into your spare room and I will bring my entire movie collection and games and…” She cuts you off by placing her hand over your mouth. 

“Don’t make me regret this.” She says while giving you a dangerous look. She slowly pulls her hand away from your mouth to reveal the playful smile on your face. She also breaks out into a smile before shooing you away from her desk claiming she has work to do. 

Later that day, you pull up outside of Emily’s apartment complex and text her that you are here. Gathering your stuff out of your car you make your way up to her apartment. When you get to the door, Emily is standing there waiting for you. 

“It’s about time you got here,” She says with a laugh as she takes some of the stuff out of your hands. 

“Hey, I have a lot of stuff,” you say in response. 

“Trust me I know.”

The two of you manage to get everything set up in the spare bedroom and you now find yourself sitting in the living room watching one of the movies you brought. Emily is sitting on the couch with her feet up on the coffee table, and you have your head resting on her shoulder with Sergio curled in between you two. I think I might enjoy this. You think to yourself

\- - - - - - - - - - - -

The weeks go by, and the two of you work together like a finely oiled machine. You both cook together, clean together, and frequently find yourself staying up late watching movies, playing games, or just enjoying each other's company. Even Sergio had gotten used to you being there. It was all feeling very domestic, and honestly, you were ok with it. You would never let Emily know how you feel though. 

The two of you usually carpool to work to save gas, but today Emily had an early morning meeting with Hotch. 

“Are you sure I don’t need to come with you?” You ask as you stand at the door of Emily’s bedroom, watching her get ready. 

“I promise I am a big girl.” She says with a laugh,” I think I can handle a meeting with Hotch.” 

“If you’re sure,” you say with an exaggerated sigh as you move over to lay on her bed. “I’m just gonna be so bored here by myself.” As if on cue, Sergio jumps onto the bed and snuggles close to you. Emily moves over to the bed and scratches him behind the ears. 

“You’re not by yourself, you have the perfect man.” She waves you a quick goodbye before walking out of her room and out of the door. You sit up and look Sergio in the eye. 

“Why did I have to fall for her?” He gives you a meow in response and jumps down from the bed. 

“Yeah I don’t know either” 

About an hour later you walk into the BAU. Your eyes are immediately drawn to Garcia, Morgan, and JJ standing by your desk looking at Hotch’s door. 

“What’s going on guys?” You ask them as you approach your desk. Garcia turns to you and immediately grabs your arm pulling you into their circle. 

“Emily is leaving,” Garcia says in a rushed manner. You are taken aback. 

“What?” You ask.

“Well, we don’t know that,” JJ reassures you. “All we know is she has been talking to Hotch for the last hour.” 

“What else could they be talking about that would take that much time?” Garcia says, slightly panicked. 

“You’re living with her right?” Morgan asks you as he rubs Garcia’s back to calm her down. “Has she said anything to you?” 

You shake your head as you look over at Hotch’s office. The door opens and Emily walks out. JJ, Garcia, and Morgan all turn to pretend like they are busy, but you don’t. You and Emily lock eyes before you turn around and sit down at your desk. 

Get a grip, you think to yourself. I knew from the beginning that us living together was temporary, so why does it hurt so bad knowing that she might be leaving. You shake your head as if shaking the thoughts out of your head and try to focus on the work you have to do. But you quickly find that task to be next to impossible. 

Abandoning the paperwork on your desk, you get up and head towards the coffee machine. While waiting for the machine to give you your coffee, you hear footsteps move next to you. Glancing over you see Emily also waiting for coffee. 

“Your meeting with Hotch lasted pretty long,” You say as you grab the pot and start to fill your cup. 

“Yeah,” she says as she lets out a breath of air, “there was a lot to talk about.” 

“Did you figure out what you needed?” You empty the rest of the pot into her cup and place the pot back into the machine. 

“Yeah, I did.” She moves her body in between yours and the counter in front of you in order to get your attention. You look up at her face and see that she is nervous. “I need to talk to you when we get home.” 

“Home?” You ask quietly, the thoughts you were trying to get away from flashing back into your head. 

“Yeah, well you know what I mean. Back to the apartment.” She says with nervous laughter. You give her a small smile and a nod. 

“OK, we can talk later.” You finish, before turning around and heading back to your desk. 

The day slowly creeps by, but eventually, it does end and you find yourself in your car on the way back home. No, not home. Emily’s apartment. You remind yourself. 

Even though the two of you had left work at roughly the same time but Emily still beat you back to the apartment. You walk in and see that she is sitting at the kitchen table, reading a book. When she notices you she puts the book down and motions for you to come closer. 

“You wanted to talk?” You cautiously ask as you move over and take the seat next to her. 

“Yeah, about what Hotch and I discussed in our meeting today.” You drop your head and your eyes become glued to the floor. 

“You’re leaving.” You say. 

“What?” Emily responds, taken aback, “No, I am not leaving. Where did you hear that?” You feel as if a thousand-pound weight has just been lifted off of your shoulders. You look up at Emily sheepishly and give her an embarrassed half-smile. 

“Garcia,” you say, causing her to bust out into laughter. She contains herself and looks back at you. She grabs both of your hands in hers and gently caresses them with her thumbs. 

“I wasn’t talking to Hotch about leaving,” she pauses and takes a deep breath, “I was talking to him about you.” 

“Me?” you ask her, your face showing your confusion. 

“(Y/N), I don’t know about you but these past few weeks have been the best of my life. When you first suggested we move in together I was skeptical because I have always been a very closed-off person. But living with you has just felt right like you belong here.”

“Emily..” you start to say when she pauses. You can’t believe the things that she is saying and honestly, none of it feels real. 

“Wait, (Y/N), let me finish. Somewhere along the line, I found myself falling for you pretty damn hard. I am not sure if you feel it too, but I want you to be more than a roommate, and certainly more than a friend. I would've asked you on an official date a while ago, but we both know the rules about fraternization between coworkers. This is why I spent an hour today convincing Hotch that if we were to take our relationship further, then we wouldn’t affect the team. And I will respect your decision if I have somehow screwed this all up and made you uncomfortable, but it is going to be slightly embarrassing if I have to go back and tell Hotch that we actually aren’t a couple and that…” 

You cut Emily off by pressing your lips against hers. You feel her body relax against yours as you slide out of your chair and move to sit in her lap. Her hands quickly find your hips and pull you impossibly closer to her. Right when things start to heat up, Sergio jumps up and squeezes himself in between you two, causing you to both break the kiss and laugh. 

“How could I say no, we’re practically already married.” You say as you look Emily in the eyes. She reaches up and tucks a piece of your hair behind your ear. 

“Do you think Sergio would be the flower girl or the ring bearer?” she asks you with a smirk as she leans in and captures your lips in another heated kiss.


	18. Jealous

Paperwork. It seems like all you guys do anymore is paperwork. Piles and piles are on your desk every morning you walk in, and it seems as if you have barely made a dent in it by the time you leave. The work isn't hard by any means, all you are doing is giving tips about the suspect to police departments, but the days were definitely long.

"I am starving," you groan out to anybody in your general vicinity. You hear Derek chuckle.

"So you have already told us three times." You cross your arms over your chest and glare at him.

"Well, maybe I wouldn't have to repeat myself if somebody could take a hint." He rolls his eyes at you.

"(Y/N), would you like to get lunch," Your mood immediately shifts and you perk up in your seat.

"Wow Derek, thank you for offering. I would love to get lunch." He shakes his head at you as he gets up from his desk.

"Anybody else wants to come?" He asks the rest of your team members but they all shake their heads. Well, all except for Emily that is. She doesn't even acknowledge that the two of you are leaving. Her eyes never left the papers in front of her, and her posture is suddenly different. It's probably nothing, you think to yourself as you and Morgan make your way to the doors.

"You're paying right big daddy." You laugh at him as he grimaces at the nickname.

"Only if you promise to never call me that again."

\- - - - - - - - - - - -

*Emily's POV*

The two of them walk back into the BAU about an hour later. They are walking side by side, practically touching and she is laughing about something that he said. It seems like she is laughing at him more and more often lately. There has got to be something going on between the two of them, I mean it is so obvious. I am watching the two of them when I feel a sharp jab in my side.

"How about you make it a little less obvious lovebird," I hear Rossi tell me. I glance over at him with a confused look on my face. He smirks at me.

"You were staring at Morgan like you wanted to gut him like a fish. Not only that but if your pen was alive, you would have suffocated it by now." I glance down at the pen in my hand and realize that he was right. I am holding on so tight that my knuckles are whiter than the sheet of paper I am writing on. I put down the pen and look back up at Rossi.

"I was not staring at him like I wanted to gut him," I say to Rossi to try and save myself as much as possible.

"Au contraire. There is no hiding it Emily you might as well come right out and tell her." He says matter of factly.

"It's not that easy Rossi, I can't just walk up to her and blurt out my feelings. What if she doesn't like me back?" I say as I nervously pick at my fingernails. Rossi notices my bad habit and sighs.

"One of the biggest things people regret is letting someone they love walk away. Besides, you'll never know, if you never ask." With those final words and a wink, he moves back over to his desk leaving me alone to ponder on my thoughts and try to figure out how I am going to tell (Y/N) that I have feelings for her.

After a long day of me thinking and barely getting any of my work done, Hotch finally says that we could go home. But before I could even get out of my seat and head towards the door, Garcia struts in with a smile on her face.

"My loves, we are going out and we are going out tonight," She says.

"Well you know me, babygirl, I am always down," Morgan says, already halfway out of the door.

"You can count me in. And I can even get Hotch to tag along." Rossi says.

"Pretty boy is coming too," Morgan says, causing Reid to startle at the mention of his name. He was the only one who hadn't made a move to leave.

"Ok that is all well and dandy but what about my ladies. JJ, Emily, (Y/N)? You guys in?" Garcia asks, giving the three of you expecting looks.

"Can't, Mommy duties," JJ says, causing Garcia to pout at her. I glance over at (Y/N) and see that she is looking at me. I raise an eyebrow in silent communication and she nods in response.

"I'll be there," I say, turning back to Garcia.

"Me too," (Y/N) says. Garcia claps her hands and does a little dance in place.

"Oh this is wonderful, we are going to have so much fun."

\- - - - - - - - - - - -

*Reader POV.

Morgan had picked the place so you don't know why you are surprised when Garcia texted you the address, and it turned out to be a club. You all had agreed to meet at 9 o'clock, giving you plenty of time to drive home and slip on some decent clothes.

By the time you get there, nearly the whole team has arrived, all except for Reid who honestly would probably flake considering clubs weren't his comfort zone. You walk over to the rest of the team and see that they have already started without you.

"Damn, how many shots have you guys taken?" You ask, laughing at Garcia who makes a face as the alcohol burns her throat.

"Enough. You need to catch up, sweet stuff. Drink up." He says as you walk over to him. He hands you the shot and you quickly down it while staring him in the eyes. He gives you a nod of respect at how easily you took the shot and passes you another.

Eventually, you make your way onto the dance floor. The shots you took have gotten to you a little bit but that was the whole point of this, to get out and relax. You look across the floor and see Morgan surrounded by girls and laugh a bit at him. Glancing back over towards the table you notice Rossi still sitting with his whiskey talking to Hotch about something scholarly.

Garcia is also somewhere on the dance floor, probably with Emily. But you haven't seen either of them in a little bit. Pushing that thought to the back of your head you start moving your body to the music.

You quickly get the attention of a group of people and they watch you for a bit before one of them starts to move closer to you.

"You look like you are having fun," the girl that walked towards you says. "Mind if I join?"

"Not at all," You say back to her with a smile. She starts to move to the music with you and her hands find your hips. Maybe it is the alcohol or the fact that this girl is insanely hot, but you make no move to displace her hands. She pulls you closer to her, and it almost gets to the point where you guys are grinding on each other.

While the two of you are dancing, you notice Emily. She is over by the bar, where you guess she has been this whole time. She notices your eyes on her, and she quickly looks away and her posture becomes rigid. She did that earlier too, you think to yourself. An idea goes off in your head, and you decide to run a little experiment.

Turning back to the girl you have been dancing with, you wrap your arms around her neck and let your hands find her hair. You notice her staring at your mouth, so you bite your lip teasingly. She starts to lean towards you for a kiss and her lips graze yours, but that's when you notice that Emily is gone. You pull your head back and give the girl an apologetic look. After giving her some pathetic excuse you make your way back over to the table.

Hotch and Rossi are now joined by Derek and Garcia who must have gotten tired. Their eyes drift over to you as you make your way over.

"I saw you on the dance floor hot stuff, I thought I was going to have to hose you down." Morgan teases you.

"I know you aren't one to talk." You say as you roll your eyes. "Did anybody see where Emily just went?" You ask, changing the subject.

"She headed outside I think," Rossi says to you. "Something about needing air." You shoot Rossi a thank you, and Morgan another glare before making your way outside to find Emily.

After you walk out of the door, Emily is not too far away. Just to your left, you see her leaning against the wall, seemingly looking at nothing. You walk over to her.

"Hey Em," You call out. Her head snaps up to look at you, before going back to whatever she was looking at.

"Emily are you ok?" You ask her, touching her on the arm.

"I'm fine," She responds, still not making eye contact with you.

"Emily no you're not. You never walk outside by yourself when you are "Fine"," You point out. The two of you stand there in silence for a minute or two, and you are about to turn around and go back inside when Emily suddenly turns to face you.

(Y/N)," she says softly but urgently, "I really like you, and I have for a while now." Your heart flutters and a smile graces your lips.

"I know, I was just waiting for you to say it," you say. Her eyes widen in surprise and her mouth nearly falls open.

"You knew?" You giggle a little at her.

"Well, I figured it out earlier. You know you are really cute when you are jealous" She rolls her eyes and crosses her arms over her chest.

"I do not get jealous." You laugh and move closer to her. You wrap your arms around her neck and she gently places her hands on your waist.

"So it didn't bother you when me and that girl were dancing like this?" You ask as you press your body against hers. She clears her throat and a blush starts to creep onto her face.

"Ok, maybe a little bit but not because I was jealous, only because I think you deserve the best. It just happens that I am the best." She leans down, bringing her face closer to yours as she smirks at you.

"I would have to agree with that." You close the distance and place a small kiss on her lips. You can taste the vodka she has had to drink tonight. You pull apart.

"Well, now I am going to be even more jealous when someone looks at you," She says in a sultry tone.

"So you are jealous?" You ask, relaxing back into her embrace.

"Maybe just a little."


	19. Act Like You Love Me

No amount of words can describe how much you hate undercover work. You have just never been very good at it. That might have something to do with your strict moral compass and inability to lie. Still, no matter how much you tell Hotch that you hate it, he stills saddles you with it from time to time. Luckily though, this time you aren’t alone. 

“Have you spotted him yet?” you ask as you turn to Emily. Based on the geographic profile that Reid had done, the unsub was most likely going to strike at this club next. You, Emily, Morgan, and JJ are posted around the club waiting until he shows up. 

“No, I haven’t,” She says as she takes a small sip of the drink in her hand. 

“Garcia is trying to hack into their security system to get a better view but for now you guys still need to keep an eye out,” Hotch says over your earpieces. 

“You heard the big man,” Emily says, “let's move over to that wall where we can see more of the club.” She grabs your hand in the dark club and pulls you over near the back of the room. 

“You seem nervous,” she says to you once the two of you get over to the wall. You give her a shy smile.

“Is it that obvious?” You say with a chuckle. She reaches out to you and reassuringly touches your arm.

“This is very low stakes. We are basically just surveying the club for people who look like they could be the unsub. It’s fine.”

You take a deep breath to calm your nerves and get back to your job. The two of you are standing there looking around for a few moments more until you see somebody that catches your eye. 

“Emily, my two o'clock,” you say, gently motioning to where you see the guy. She looks over and sees the same guy that you do. 

“Male looks like late thirties and fits the description the victim gave us,” Emily says into the earpiece. Not long after you spotted him, you notice that his chest looks lumpy, and he is holding what looks to be a remote in his hand. You glance over at Emily and you can tell she has seen it too.

“Hotch I think he has a bomb attached to him,” you say. 

“We didn’t profile him as somebody who would use explosives. Don’t approach him, we could be putting a lot of people in danger.” Hotch relays to you. 

Suddenly the unsub looks in your direction and catches your eye. You quickly look away from him but you can still feel his gaze. Looking out of the corner of your eye you see him still staring at you with a look of anger on his face. 

“Emily, he knows something is up, what do we do?” You ask. Your chest is tight and you feel shaky. Emily sees you panicking and grabs your hand. 

“It’s ok,” she says softly, “ just look me in the eyes.” You look up and lock eyes with Emily as she smiles at you. 

“Ok now glance down like I just said something cheeky,” you do what she says. Emily moves closer to you and places one of her hands on your cheek guiding your eyes back to meet hers. She gives you a small smirk. 

“Wrap your arms around my waist”

You do and for a second you feel your breath stop in your chest because of how close you are to her. 

“Now just close your eyes.” You did and before you realize what’s happening her lips are on yours and she is pulling your body flush against her. Her hands roam over your face and your back, but you are frozen in shock for a second. When you feel her tongue graze your bottom lip you are jerked back to your senses and remember why she is doing this. You start to respond and grab hold of her shirt. Slowly the two of you break away, and your gaze is drawn back to hers. 

“Ok, now just keep looking at me, don’t look over at him. Act like you love me,” she whispers. A blush forms on your cheeks and you are afraid of how real all of this is no matter how much you tell yourself it isn’t

“Hotch, do you have a visual?” She asks into her earpiece.

“Yeah we got it, you two are clear, he is headed towards Morgan and JJ. They are prepared to talk him down.” He says.

“Are you ok?” She asks as she slowly lets go of you.

“Yeah,” you say, your voice still shaky, but not from fear.

“Good, now let’s go help them get this guy”. 

\- - - - - - - - - - - -

That was two weeks ago, and Emily is walking around like it didn’t even happen, but you can’t. Everything has changed since then. Not only have you suddenly realized your feelings for Emily, but you are also panicking. You have always thought you were straight, and you have only ever dated men. You can’t even wrap your head around having any sort of relationship with a woman. 

All of that to say that you have been walking on eggshells around her. You know the team notices, it’s obvious especially with a team of profilers. Even Garcia noticed that you are keeping her at arm's length, and she isn’t even an official agent. You have to figure something out and you have to figure it out fast

“Emily, can I talk to you?” You ask as you walk up to her desk. 

“Of course, what’s up?” She puts down the files in her hand and looks up at you.

“It is kind of a personal matter,” you say as you pick at your cuticles. She notices your bad habit and looks at you with eyes of concern. 

“Uhm sure of course. Let's talk in the bathroom.”

The two of you walk to the bathroom with you in the lead. Once you enter the bathroom Emily closes and locks the door before turning to you expectantly. But you don’t say anything, you just stand there and stare at her for a second

“You wanted to talk?” Emily says. 

“Oh, yes right yeah. Uhm I just wanted to apologize for acting so strange lately.” The look of concern leaves her face as she gives you a reassuring smile. 

“It’s ok really, you’re fine.” She says. 

“No,” you insist, “I should be more professional. You have managed to move past that day without a single second thought about it but for some reason, I just can’t do the same.”

“What day?” She asks, confused. You look down at the floor and turn around to pace the floor. 

“When we went undercover and we kissed? I know it meant nothing and you just did it to get the unsub off of our backs but I haven’t gone a day without thinking about it.”

“You think about it?” She says quietly, more to herself than to you. 

“I know you want to forget about it..” you start to say but she cuts you off. 

“No I don't,” she says as she reaches out to you to stop your pacing. You glance up in surprise. 

“What?” She starts to move closer to you.

“I don’t want to forget about it. Actually, I was hoping I would get the chance to do it again.” Your mouth falls open in surprise, you can’t believe what you’re hearing. 

“Are you serious?” You ask. She nods. 

“More serious than I have been about anything ever.”

“I keep imagining how it would feel to kiss you. Not just to throw off the unsub, like a real kiss.” You stutter out as your brain moves too fast for your mouth. Emily gives you a small laugh.

It feels like a magnet is pulling you towards each other, and your lips are hovering over each other’s. Slowly and carefully they touch. 

The kiss starts soft and cautionary as if neither one of you wants to cross some invisible line. But when nobody pulls away, your hands start to find each other and the kiss deepens. When you break the kiss, Emily’s lipstick is smeared on your face and her hair has fallen out of its ponytail.

“Wow,” was the only word your brain could form. 

“Now you know,” Emily says with a smirk.

“What?”

“What it’s like to kiss me, now you know.” Both of you let out a laugh. 

“Did it live up to your expectations?” She asks you as her hands caress your back. 

“Definitely,” you say before capturing her lips again in another kiss.


	20. Promise?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning - Sexual Content/Smut

You are awoken by ringing, a loud obnoxious ringing that was bothering you way too early in the morning. Looking over towards your nightstand, you see that it is Emily’s phone and not yours so you turn over and ignore it.

Clearly, the ringing hadn’t woken her up, because when you turn back over you see your still sleeping girlfriend. You snuggle up closer to her to try and feel her warmth. Your movement wakes her up, and she slowly opens her eyes to look down at you. She gives you a sleepy smile and you kiss her on the lips. As she wakes up more she deepens the kiss and rolls the two of you over so you are on top of her. 

The two of you don’t get to spend the night together often, given that she is often on the case, so when you do the two of you both take advantage of it. She runs her hands up your back, not having to worry about clothing that was taken off the night before. You detach your lips from hers and start to plant kisses down her neck. 

“To what do I owe such a pleasant wake-up call?” She asks you. 

“Your phone woke me up, and I am bored,” was all the response you gave before reattaching your lips to her neck. Slowly you slide your way down her body and your kisses migrate from her neck to her breast. 

“My phone?” She asks you, and as if on cue, the ringing starts back up again. She reaches over and grabs her phone looking at the caller ID. 

“Shit,” she says before answering. “Hey Jayge,” She says into the phone. You move your hand between your bodies and start to lightly circle her clit. “I’ll be there in..ohh,” She lets out an involuntary moan as you press one of your fingers into her while simultaneously grazing your teeth across her nipple. You mentally give yourself a high five for getting a reaction out of her. She shoots you a glare but you keep going. 

“No JJ I am fine, I’ll be there in a few…yeah ok bye.” She hangs up the phone and her head falls back against the pillow. “(Y/N), I need to get to work soon.” She says breathlessly. 

“Don’t worry,” you say seductively as you look up at her “I will be quick.” Moving further down her body, you kiss up and down her thighs. She sighs before you wrap your lips around her clit. 

Her hands find their way into your hair as she lets out a gasp. Emily gently tugs on your hair, causing you to moan and send pleasure directly to her. She grabs your face and pulls you up to kiss you again. She ravishes your mouth as if she were trying to taste herself on your tongue. Your fingers quickly replace where your mouth was, and you move two fingers inside of her. Emily breaks away from the kiss, desperately needing air, as the two of you are now panting. 

“That feels so good, (Y/N)” She says as she moves her hips harder against your hand. Your thumb finds her clit and she nearly loses it right there. You feel her walls clenching and you curl your fingers up, hoping to find that special spot. 

“Oh god,” she moans as she cums for you. Her body tenses around your fingers before she relaxes back on the bed. Once she has calmed down from her high, you take your fingers out of her and lick her juices off of them. She lazily looks up at you and grabs the back of your head, pulling you back down for another kiss. 

“That was great,” she says after catching her breath, “but I really have to go to work now.” She sits up and moves to get dressed. You stay laying in bed and just admire her beauty as she walks across the room naked. She moves to the drawer and pulls out a pair of underwear and a bra and quickly puts them on, before pulling a pair of your dress pants over them. But she is still looking around for something. 

“What do you need?” You ask her. She turns and looks at you. 

“I need my shirt.” She says, “what did you do with it last night?” You softly chuckle thinking back on what the two of you did last night.

“Babe, the way I ripped that off, I would be surprised if it is even in one piece,” You say with a laugh, before dodging a shoe that she aimed at your head. “Why do you even need it, you borrowed my pants why can’t you borrow a shirt?” She stops and gives you a dirty look. 

“It’s not mine, (Y/N), I borrowed that shirt from JJ. Now help me find it.” You roll your eyes and walk over behind her. You wrap your arms around her waist and lay your head on her shoulder. She relaxes against your embrace.

“I would love to help you, but I think I like you better without a shirt on,” you whisper in her ear. You can feel her shiver against you, but she keeps a hold of herself and spins around in your arms. 

“(Y/N), I love you, but I am serious.” You smirk at her and kiss her lightly on the lips before walking towards the door, and picking up her shirt that was laying right next to you the dresser. She sighs in relief before walking over and grabbing the shirt from you, before turning back around and walking away with a huff.

“Come on Em, I was just messing with you,” you say as you move back over to sit on the bed. 

“I know,” she says as she pulls the shirt over her head, “But because of you I am even later for work.” You smirk to yourself as you watch her put the finishing touches on her outfit. 

“I don’t recall hearing you telling me to stop,” you say. She turns around to you with a scowl. She walks over to you and moves to where she is standing in between your legs and you are looking up at her. She bends down to where her lips are barely above yours. 

“You are going to pay for making me late later,” she says, her breath ghosting on your lips. 

“Promise?” You ask before pressing your lips against hers. When you break away she winks at you before walking out of the bedroom, leaving you to only imagine what she has in store for you.


	21. Sleep Deprived

You glance at the clock after finishing your last write-up about the case you had just finished. It reads 12:42 in the morning. You groan as you pack your stuff and get ready to head home. Just as you are about to head towards the door though, you notice that the light is still on in Emily’s office. You thought that you were the only person still here. You walk up to her door and knock before gently opening it. Emily is sitting behind her desk, a pile of papers in front of her.

“Hey Em, staying late tonight?” you ask as she looks up at you. 

“Yeah, I just have some work I need to finish up.” She motions to the papers around her. 

You quickly glance around her office and notice that there is a blanket folded up on the couch and her go-bag is sitting on the floor, opened. You step into her office and close the door behind you. 

“Emily, have you been sleeping at the office?” You ask her as you walk over to her desk. 

“No,” she responds, still going through the papers on her desk. 

“Emily,” you say, crossing your arms over your chest, “you do remember I am a profiler right? I know you’re lying.” 

“Technically I’m not lying. You asked if I sleep here, the answer is no.” She responds curtly. 

“You don’t sleep?” You ask as you sit down on the edge of her desk. “Emily you know that isn’t good for you.”

“I can sleep when I am dead.” She says with a pained laugh.

“Emily,” you say seriously. Your tone of voice causes her to finally look up at you. “I am serious, you need to go home and sleep.” She sighs. 

“I promise, I will go home once I finish, ok?” You shake your head. 

“Nope, not ok. I need to make sure that you get home.” She leans back in her chair and crosses her arms. 

“Ok, how about I call you when I get home.” You copy Emily and cross your arms as well. 

“Still not good enough, how will I know you’re really at home and not still here?” 

“Well, what do you propose?” She asks with a roll of her eyes. An idea pops into your head and you smile at her. 

“How about I drive you home, just so I am sure,” she pauses for a second, and you can tell that she is at least considering it. I mean, technically she is your boss, so she doesn’t have to do anything you say, but you can see her resolve slipping by the second.

“Fine,” she says with a sigh, “just give me a second to put these files away.” 

\- - - - - - - - - - - - 

“OK, we are here, is this good enough?” Emily asks as you put the car into park. 

“Now what kind of person would I be if I didn’t make sure you got into the house safe and sound?” You turn the car off and get out of the car. Emily gets out too and you follow her as she walks to the door. When the two of you get to the door, you lean against the wall while you watch Emily get out her keys and unlock her front door. 

Once she gets it open she walks through the door, and you get ready to walk back to your car. But she stops and turns back around to you. 

“Do you want to come in?” She asks. 

“I shouldn’t,” you respond, “you need a good night's rest.” Again, you start to turn to go back to your car, when you feel Emily lightly grab your wrist. 

“(Y/N), it is already 1:30 in the morning, and there are crazy people on the roads. I wouldn’t be able to sleep if I let you drive home this late at night. You can sleep in the spare bedroom and borrow some of my clothes.” You smile at her.

“Well if you insist.” She laughs a bit and motions for you to come into her apartment. 

This isn’t the first time you have been to Emily’s place, so you know where everything is. She still shows you to the bedroom though. After handing you some clothes you can sleep in she says goodnight and heads to her room. 

Once Emily is gone, you get changed and lay down in bed. But you can’t stop thinking about her. You are somewhere between being awake and being asleep when you hear some noises coming from down the hall. Curiosity gets the best of you and you find yourself walking towards Emily’s bedroom door. You hear sounds coming from inside so you knock on the door. There is some shuffling before it swings open and you are face to face with Emily. 

“Is everything ok?,” She asks as she leans against the door. 

“I came to ask you the same thing,” you peak around her into her room and see that it is a mess. Her sheets are crumpled up on her bed and there are papers strewn around her desk and the floor. 

“Oh yeah, I am fine,” she moves over to the side a bit to block your view. You move your gaze back to Emily and look her in the eye.

“You don’t seem fine,” you say gently. “Want to talk about it?” She sighs and walks back over to sit on her bed. You follow her and sit next to her. 

“I’ve been having this nightmare,” she says barely above a whisper. 

“That’s why you’re not sleeping?” you gently ask, matching her tone. She nods and wraps her arms around herself. “Emily, that’s nothing to be ashamed of.”

“I know it’s not but, I’m the unit chief now I can’t let these things get to me.” You reach over and grab her hand. She lets you, and you gently squeeze it. 

“Emily you don’t have to be so tough all of the time,” she glances up at you and the two of you lock eyes. After a moment of the two of you sitting there, you shift on the bed and gently tug Emily’s arm. 

“What are you doing?” she asks but follows your moves. 

“My mom used to do this when I had nightmares, it helps I promise.” You move onto her bed and lay down, pulling Emily with you. The two of you shift so you are laying on your back and Emily is tucked under your arm. 

“You trust me right?” you ask. She nods. “Then relax.” She takes a deep breath before relaxing and letting her body melt into yours. You gently run your hand through her hair and not long after, the two of you drift off to sleep. 

When you wake up, Emily has her arms wrapped around you and you are facing each other. You open your eyes to see her looking at you. You give her a tired smile. 

“Good morning,” you say groggily, as you try to stretch out as much as possible with her arms around you. 

“Good morning,” She says with a smirk. 

“How did you sleep?” You ask. 

“Better than I have in a while.” 

“No nightmares?” You ask carefully. 

“No nightmares,” she responds, causing you both to break out into a smile. 

“I told you it would help, I might have to stay over more often,” you say jokingly, as you poke Emily in the side. 

“Yeah, you might,” she says seriously, as her eyes roam over your face. She tucks a strand of your hair behind your ear, before moving closer to you. Gently she leans forward and kisses you. As she pulls back, she runs her thumb across your cheek.

“Thank you,” she says softly.

“For what?

“For being here. You make me feel safe.” 

“Emily Prentiss that was awfully cheesy,” you say with a small laugh. 

“Maybe I am just sleep-deprived,” she responds, a smile playing on her lips. 

“Yeah that’s probably it,” you say softly before pulling Emily closer to you. 

Maybe she was just sleep-deprived, maybe she wasn’t and she meant what she said. But either way, you were going to hold onto her for as long as she would let you.


	22. You're Lying

You are in your car, driving home from a long day at work. All you can think about is getting home, taking a warm shower, and relaxing in bed. Your thoughts are interrupted by your phone ringing, and you glanced down to see your wife’s name. 

“Hey Em,” you say as you answer the phone. 

“Hey (Y/N), it is actually JJ,” you hear. 

“Oh, hey JJ, why do you have Emily’s phone?” You ask her, worry slightly creeping into your voice. 

“Emily has gotten a little hurt.” Your heart drops. You quickly pull your car over to the side of the road and put it into park. 

“Hurt? JJ what happened?” you asked, not even bothering to keep the panic out of your voice. You can vaguely make out Emily saying something in the background. 

“Uhm one second I think she wants to tell you,” JJ says before you hear Emily’s voice. 

“Hey honey, I don’t know why JJ called you. We are just going to the hospital as protocol.” Just based on the tone of her voice, you can tell that she is in pain. She should know you know her well enough to tell things like that. 

“Emily, what happened?” You ask her gently, hoping that she tells you the truth. 

“It’s not that bad babe I promise…” she starts but you cut her off. 

“Emily,” you say in a serious tone, starting to get frustrated. 

“Yes?” She asks softly. 

“Put JJ back on the phone,” you say. 

“But babe..” you cut her off again, this time raising your voice slightly. 

“I need you to put JJ on the phone or I will add some more injuries to the ones you already have,” you hear Emily sigh and she hands the phone back over to JJ. 

“JJ, what hospital are they taking her to? I will be there as soon as I can.” You put your car back into drive, pull back onto the road, and speed your way to the hospital. 

\- - - - - - - - - - - -

Once you have gotten parked you jump out of the car and rush through the hospital doors. You see the team in the waiting room, some standing, some sitting, and you make your way over to them. JJ gets up from her seat and she walks over to meet you. 

“Is she ok?” you ask once JJ gets close enough to hear you. 

“Yeah she’s fine it wasn’t anything life-threatening. She got into a small altercation with the unsub and sustained a couple of injuries.” JJ says. 

“What injuries?” You ask. Hearing that Emily is fine, your heart rate slows, but you are still slightly on edge. 

“She has a few broken ribs and a pretty bad concussion. They were talking about keeping her overnight to run a few tests, to make sure she doesn’t have any brain injuries.” You sigh as you run your hands through your hair. 

“Thank you JJ,” she gives you a small smile. 

“No problem, her room is right down the hall first door to the right.” She points down the hall. You give her a quick wave and another thank you before making your way to Emily’s room.

As you open the door, you see Emily sitting on the hospital bed looking out of the window. You notice her holding her side gingerly. The room is dim, probably to help with her concussion, so it takes her a second to notice you have walked in. 

“Hey (Y/N),” she says when she notices you. She immediately tries to sit up and change her posture but you can tell it is causing her pain. You cross your arms and walk over to sit in the chair next to her. 

“What did JJ tell you?” She asks, correctly assuming that you talked with her best friend. You lean your forearms onto the bed and look at her in the eye. 

“That you're worse off than you wanted me to believe.” 

“It’s really not that bad,” She says as she breaks your eye contact. You glance down to where she had been holding her side earlier and lightly touch her bandaged ribs, causing her to wince in pain. You move your hand back as you look up at her. Gently you grab her hand and interlace your fingers with hers. 

“You’re lying to me,” You say in a whisper. She looks down at your hands as she runs her thumb across your fingers. 

“I’m not lying. I am just carefully choosing the things that I tell you,” she says with a shrug. 

“Yeah that counts as lying you idiot,” you say with a small laugh before you get serious. “I was worried about you.” She lifts your hands to her mouth and kisses the back of your knuckles. 

“I’m sorry,” she says, “It won’t happen again.” 

“It better not,” you say before breaking into a smile again, “I just can’t believe you got your ass kicked” you laugh as she rolls her eyes, but breaks out into a smile too. 

“I didn’t get my ass kicked.” She says.

“Oh really?” you ask sarcastically, “So why are you in the hospital then?”

“I told you, it’s just protocol.” She says with a smirk. You lean down and lightly press your lips against hers. 

“You don’t always have to be the tough guy you know?” you say as you pull away. 

“I know,” she says, “but you fell in love with the tough guy.” You scoff at her and shake your head. 

“You think I fell in love with you because you’re some badass FBI agent?” She gives you a confused look and nods her head. You laugh before looking back at Emily. 

“Em, I hate to break it to you, but this tough guy act is not the reason I fell in love with you. I fell in love with you because you are kind and loving, and selfless, and funny, and stubborn in the best way. Is the fact that you’re a badass FBI agent a plus? Hell yeah,” She laughs a bit, but stops when it hurts her ribs. The smile drops from your face, and is replaced with a look of concern. “but Em, my love isn’t going to diminish the second you admit that you are hurting, or that you need help.” 

“Good,” she says as she lets out a breath of air, “because this hurts like a bitch.” You laugh a little, before bending down and giving her another quick kiss. 

“Want me to see if the doctor can give you something for the pain?” you ask. 

“Yes please,” she has her bottom lip poked out and is giving you puppy dog eyes. 

“You are such a baby,” you say. 

“But I am your baby.”


	23. Halloween!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As a Halloween special, here are a few short Halloween-themed imagines xoxo.

Pumpkins

“I could use some help,” You yell as you try to make your way through the front door. Your girlfriend comes running to you, thinking you are in trouble, but stops in her tracks when she sees you. 

“(Y/ N), what the hell are those?” she asks as she gives you a look of disbelief. 

“Uhm, pumpkins,” you say giving her a confused face, still struggling to get through the door. Emily rolls her eyes before walking over to you and taking one of the pumpkins out of your hands and helping you through the door. 

“Yeah, I know they are pumpkins. I meant, what are they for?” The two of you make your way into the kitchen and sit the pumpkins down on the counter. You turn to her with a huge smile. 

“I thought we could carve pumpkins.” She gives you a blank stare before shaking her head. 

“Carving pumpkins is for children.” You cross your arms over your chest and furrow your eyebrows. 

“It is not. It is a fun Halloween activity that can be enjoyed by people of all ages,” you say in a serious tone. Emily laughs and walks over to you. 

“Well, I hope you enjoy your fun Halloween activity. I have grown up work to do.” She gives you a light kiss on your forehead before turning around and heading back to her office. 

“Whatever, I will just have all of the fun by myself.” You shout out to her retreating body. Turning back to your pumpkin, you grab your tools and get to work. 

Halfway through carving your pumpkin, you decide you want to listen to some music, so you turn on your phone and start jamming out to the monster mash. As you are dancing around to the music, you miscalculate where the knife is as you go to pick it up. Accidentally grabbing the blade, you pull back to see a gash on your palm and blood seeping out. 

“Shit!” you call out while holding onto your injured hand. 

“Everything ok?” Emily calls out, from her office. 

“That depends on your definition of ok,” you say as you look around for a towel or something. 

“(Y/N), if this is something stupid again,” you hear Emily say as she walks into the kitchen. But when she sees you, her eyes widen, and she rushes over to you, grabbing a dishrag on the way. 

“How did your fun activity turn into a bloodbath?” she asks you as she wraps the rag around your hand. 

“If you had carved pumpkins with me, this would have never happened,” you say defensively. 

“Well, I didn’t realize you needed adult supervision,” she says with a roll of her eyes. But then she looks back at your hand with concern. “I think you might need stitches.” 

“Couldn’t you just kiss it and make it better?” You look at Emily with puppy dog eyes and a pout. With a small smile, she leans forward and kisses your lips gently. 

“While I am not complaining, I was talking about my hand,” you say sarcastically. She lightly hits your arm. 

“Come one, let's get you to the hospital.”

Trick or Treat

“Are you sure you can’t come?” Garcia asks as you guys get ready to leave work for the day.

“I’m sorry Pen, I promised my nephew I would take him trick or treating.” 

Every year, Penelope throws a huge Halloween bash. Everyone in the BAU was invited, of course, plus you got to meet some of Garcia’s other friends, who were always very interesting. Unfortunately, though, this year, your nephew has begged you to take him trick or treating, and how could you say no.

“I understand. You gotta make the kid happy. You have to come next year, though! Pinky promise?” Garcia holds out her pinky to you. 

“I promise,” you say with a laugh as you lock pinkies with her. She shoots you a quick goodbye before meeting Morgan and getting in the elevator to head home. 

“You’re not gonna make it to the party?” you hear a voice ask you. 

“Emily Prentiss, were you spying on my conversation?” you ask as you turn to face her. 

“Maybe,” she says with a shrug. 

“Well, for your information, no, I’m not. Instead, I will be walking around my neighborhood trying to control spiderman with a sugar rush,” you say with a sigh. 

“I can come with you,” Emily offers. You look up at her with surprise. 

“You would rather hang out with a six-year-old than go to Garcia’s party?” you ask. She hesitates as she looks at you. 

“Well, no,” she admits with a small laugh, “but I don’t want you to be lonely.” You feel yourself starting to blush, and you subconsciously reach up to play with your hair.

“Well, you’re going to need a costume.”

\- - - - - - - - - - - -

5 o’clock comes around and you are putting on the finishing touches to your costume as your nephew sits in the living room preparing himself for what he claims is the best night of the year. You finish right as you hear the doorbell ring. As you open the door, your mouth drops open. Standing there is Emily, wearing a tight red shirt, black skinny jeans, and a flowing cape. 

“Emily Prentiss, I think you’ve outdone yourself,” you say as you look her up and down.

“Why thank you. Now, what are you supposed to be?” You feign a look of hurt. 

“Well, if the shorts and boxing gloves didn’t give it away, I am obviously a doctor,” you say with a smirk. She lets out a laugh, and your heart flutters. Clearing your throat, you call out for your nephew, and the three of you head out to the neighborhood. 

A few hours, and what seemed like a hundred houses later, you finally make your way back home. Your nephew had long since gotten tired and was now fast asleep in Emily’s arms as you made your way back to your house. 

“I can carry him if you want Em,” you say. 

“He only weighs like 40 pounds. I am fine,” she says as she looks over at you. You stare at her in awe. Not only did she give up her night to walk around in the cold with you, but now she is willingly carrying your nephew home. At this point, you don’t think you can fall any more in love with her. 

Once you get back to the house, you open the door for her and show her to the guest room, where she lays down your nephew and closes the door behind her. She comes back into the living room to see you sitting on the couch, pouring two glasses of wine. She sits next to you, and you hand her a glass. 

“Thank you Em, I don’t know what I would have done tonight without you.” she looks over at you and smiles. 

“I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else,” she says as her gaze finds yours. She shifts closer to you, and your breath catches in your throat. She sets her glass down on the coffee table before taking your glass and doing the same. Once both glasses have been moves out of the way, her hand drifts to your back, and she pulls you closer. Your hands find her waist, and your lips connect in a magical kiss. 

She gently bites your lips, causing you to gasp, and she uses this as an opportunity to slip her tongue into your mouth. Emily quickly dominates the kiss and gently pushes you back on the couch so that she is laying on top of you. Your hands roam her body, and you start to take off her cape when you hear the doorbell. You quickly pull apart, and you glance over and notice that your porch light is still on. Emily groans and you let out a small laugh. 

“God, I hate trick or treaters.”

Costume Contest

You rush out of the elevators and make your way into the BAU. 

“So nobody was going to tell me that Quantico holds an annual costume contest?” you ask angrily to nobody in particular. This is only the second year that you have worked for the Behavioral Analysis Unit, and you had just found a flyer downstairs advertising the contest. 

“It’s not that big of a deal,” Morgan says as he looks up at you. 

“Not that big of a deal?” you ask in disbelief. “According to this flyer, the winner not only gets a trophy but also gets an extra vacation day!” Everybody stares at you blankly, and you throw your hands up in exasperation. 

“Come on guys, you all are really telling me none of you are going to participate?” 

“If you want to do it, talk to Emily,” JJ says as she motions towards Emily's office. “She and Garcia are the only ones from the BAU who do it.” 

“You know what,” you say as you cross your arms over your chest, “I will.” 

You walk away and make your way up the steps to Em’s office. You knock on the door and hear Emily tell you to come in. You open her door and walk into the room. Making your way over to Emily’s desk, you put the piece of paper down in front of her. Startled, she looks up at you with a confused face. 

“(Y/N), what are you doing?” she asks as she picks up the flyer. 

“JJ said you always do the costume contest. I want to do it too.” She put the flyer back down and goes back to the paperwork she had in front of her. 

“I’m not doing it this year,” she says. You sit down in the chair across from her. 

“Why not?” you ask. She sighs and motions to the papers and files that are sitting on her desk. 

“With all of this new work being Unit Chief, I just don't have the time.” You sit back in your chair and think for a second before you get a light bulb idea. 

“Let's do a couples costume!” you say excitedly, but you can tell she doesn’t share your enthusiasm. 

“Why would we do that? We aren’t even a couple” she says. 

“Well duh, but think about it, not only will we get extra points being in a couples costume, but you won’t have to do any planning I will do it all,” you finish with a smile. 

“If I agree, will you leave and let me finish my work?” she asks with a raised eyebrow. 

“Scout’s honor,” you say, holding up three fingers. She runs a hand through her hair. 

“Fine,” she says, “but seriously, I have a lot of work to do.” she shoos you out of her office, and you get ready to plan your costume. 

\- - - - - - - - - - - -

“Remind me again why I let you do this to me?” Emily asks you as she squirms on the couch in front of you. 

“I don’t know, and I don’t care. Now, sit still so I can finish.” 

You had decided to go as the sun and the moon. You suggested it, and it seemed simple enough to Emily. But now she was starting to wonder why she trusted you. You were wearing a sparkly yellow tube top, with a yellow pencil skirt, while Emily was wearing a silver tank top and shiny silver skinny jeans. The two of you looked great, but now you had to finish the makeup.

“I don’t understand why we can’t just put on our headbands and take the picture like this,” Emily says as she moves away from your hand again. 

“Emily Prentiss. If you don’t stop being so stubborn, I am going to sit on you!” you try to sound intimidating, but she rolls her eyes and pushes your hand away from her face. 

“That’s it,” you say as you move from your crouching position in front of the couch to sit on Emily’s lap. Emily freezes, and instinctively, her hands find your hips as she looks you in your eyes. You stop breathing for a second before snapping out of it and leaning forward to finish her makeup. You are so close to each other that your brain is telling you to kiss her. Ignoring that part of your mind, you quickly finish and move off of her. 

“Ok let's take the picture now,” you say as you hand her the headband. The two of you stand in front of the camera you had set up and get ready to take the picture. At this point, the tension is almost palpable. 

The two of you take the pictures and try different poses before you move over, grab the camera, and start to find which picture you are going to submit for the contest. Emily immediately goes to take off her costume as you make your way over and sit on the couch to find the best one. Once Emily has changed, she comes back into the room and sits down next to you. 

“We look good together,” she says as glances at the pictures. You look over at her and realize just how close she is to you. 

“Yeah, we do,” you say in a hushed tone. Emily bites her lip as she looks you in the eye. Her hand snakes around your waist, and she leans in close to you. Her lips hover over yours for a moment before you close the distance. She pulls you closer to her as your hand finds her face. When the two of you pull apart, you can’t help but giggle. 

“What’s so funny?” Emily asks, slightly confused.

“You have a little bit of sun on your lips,” you reach up to wipe your yellow lipstick off of her lips. “Do you think we are going to win?” you ask. 

“I think I already won,” Emily says before leaning down and capturing your lips with hers one more time.


	24. Birthday Wish

You wake up to your alarm going off in your hotel room. Stretching and wiping the sleep out of your eyes, you get out of bed and move to get ready. 

Today was Wednesday. That’s all. Just a normal everyday Wednesday with absolutely nothing else going on at all. At least that is what you told yourself. 

Truthfully it wasn’t a normal Wednesday, it was your birthday. But nobody knew. So you didn’t wake up to happy birthday text, nobody sent balloons or flowers, and you definitely weren’t expecting gifts. And that’s exactly how you liked it.

As you get ready, you think back on past years. Your birthday has never been special to you. Not because you didn’t want it to be but because you never had anybody around to make it special.

Growing up with neglectful parents, birthdays were often forgotten, along with other things. And then once you moved out and left for college, friends would throw a happy birthday your way whenever they saw you, but nobody cared enough to do much more than that. That is why when you moved here and started at the BAU, you didn’t tell anybody when your birthday was so you wouldn’t be disappointed when they ultimately forgot. 

It didn’t help that you guys were about to wrap up the case, so you didn’t want to distract anybody from the task at hand. 

Walking downstairs, you meet Emily and Reid and the three of you drive together to the Sheriff’s Office. Emily is driving, you are in the passenger seat, and Reid is sitting in the back. On the way, Reid gets a call from Garcia, just to give him some information that he has asked her for. 

“It turns out that the victims all had a long history of sexual assault claims, but no charges were ever filed.” She says over the phone. 

“So this is probably about revenge of some sort,” you say out loud. 

“Is that (Y/N)?” Garcia asks. 

“Yeah, it’s me, Garcia,” you respond. 

“(Y/N), I am very upset with you,” she says angrily. You can tell where she is going with this so you try to stop her. 

“Garcia…” you say in a warning tone, but she completely misses it. 

“I am serious missy, how could you think I wouldn’t find out what today was,”

“Garcia seriously stop talking,” you say forcefully into the phone. 

“What is she talking about (Y/N)?” Emily asks as she glances over at you. 

“Kitten over here didn’t tell us that today was her birthday. I mean seriously it is an insult to my skills to think that I wouldn’t figure it out,” Garcia says. 

“Bye Penelope,” you say as you take Reid’s phone and hang up. But the damage has already been done. 

“Today is your birthday?” Reid asks you. 

“Yeah it is,” you say with a sigh, “but can we please forget about it.” Just then, 1` 3Emily pulls into the parking lot and puts the car into park. She turns in her seat to face you. 

“What do you mean forget it? It’s your birthday.” She says. 

“Emily, please,” you say, practically begging her. 

“Reid, can we have a second?” Emily asks Reid. He nods his head and grabs his stuff as he gets out of the car and moves into the building. Once he is gone Emily looks at you and grabs one of your hands. 

“(Y/N), talk to me. Why are you being so cagey about your birthday?” She asks gently.

“It’s just not important ok?” you say as you look away from her. 

“A whole day celebrating you, I think that’s pretty damn important.” You shake your head and give a pained laugh. 

“I never celebrate me though, nobody ever has, nobody ever will. My parents forgot my birthday nearly every year, my friends did too. I would get my hopes up just to be disappointed every single year. So can you please just drop it Em? Please?”

“Fine, I’ll drop it. Just answer one question for me. If you could have one birthday wish what would it be?” She asks as she squeezes your hand. You wrack through your brain thinking, what would you want. 

“I’ve always wanted it to be like those movies where you wake up and your favorite flowers are sitting on your nightstand with a cute little note,” you say in a whisper. Emily looks at you for another moment before nodding and getting out of the car. You follow her and the two of you walk into the Sheriff’s Office. 

You finished the case that day, and before you knew it, you guys were on a flight back to Quantico. As you walk into the BAU, Hotch stops you specifically. 

“I’m going to need you to write up the report about this case.” He says. 

“But why me? Don’t you or Morgan usually do it?” You ask, slightly irritated. 

“We can’t always do your work for you, (Y/N),” Hotch says sternly as he crosses his arms across his chest. 

“But Hotch that means I will be here for hours,” you complain. But his face just hardens and he glares at you. 

“I am your Unit Chief (Y/N), if I tell you to do something, you do it. Understood?” You shrink under his tone and his intense glare and slowly nod your head, before grabbing the files and making your way over to your desk. 

Hours pass and the rest of the team has already left, even Hotch. It is already 9 o’clock, and you are just now finishing up. You walk up to Hotch’s office and leave the report on his desk for him to go over in the morning. 

Once you have walked out of the building and are sitting in the car, you take a deep breath and let out a groan. Lord knows you can not wait to get home and just relax with a nice warm shower. 

As you pull into your apartment complex, you notice Emily’s car, but she isn’t in it. So you get out of your car and start to walk to your apartment, and that is when you see her. She is standing right outside of your apartment door with a suspicious look on her face. 

“Emily, what are you doing here?” You ask, confused. 

“I will tell you in a second, but first you have to promise not to be mad.” She says with a small smile on her face. 

“Why would I be mad Em?” She grabs your hand and pulls you into your apartment. 

“SURPRISE!” The whole team shouts and you jump a little bit from shock. Your apartment is filled with streamers and balloons, there are presents piled up on the couch, and a cake sitting on the kitchen table. Suddenly six pairs of arms are tackling you for a hug. 

“Why didn’t you tell us it was your birthday?” JJ asks. 

“Happy Birthday Kiddo,” Rossi says. 

“Damn, you're getting old sweet cheeks,” Morgan throws in. You stand there quietly while they are all talking around you, just admiring everything that the team put together in such a small time. 

“You guys did all of this for me?” You ask, speechless. 

“You have Emily to thank for all of this,” Hotch says. You turn to him and see a smug look on his face. 

“You made me stay late on purpose,” you say, feigning anger. He just laughs his very rare yet kind laugh. 

“Happy Birthday (Y/N)” He says. 

“Now let's go eat that beautiful cake,” Garcia exclaims, and everybody moves to the kitchen except for you and Emily. You turn to her and smile. 

“You really did all of this?” You ask in awe. 

“There’s more,” she says as she grabs your hand and drags you to your bedroom. You open the door and walk in, and your breath hitches in your throat. Sitting right there on your nightstand is a large bouquet of daisies. 

“You won’t be waking up to them, but I hope it counts for something.” Tears start to brim in your eyes, and you look at Emily. 

“My favorite flower, how did you know?” you ask your voice barely above a whisper. 

“I just know things,” she says with a small shrug. You walk over to her and pull her into a lingering hug. 

“Thank you, Emily, for doing this,” you say. She pulls back from the hug and smiles. 

“I would do anything for you,” she says quietly. You look into her eyes for a moment before impulsive takes over and you press your lips against hers. She melts into the kiss, and her arms wrap around you, pulling you closer to her body. When the two of you pull away, you are both wearing the biggest grins. 

“Now let’s go before they take all of your cake,” she says with a laugh, and the two of you rejoin the group for the best birthday of your life.


	25. Miss You Already

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is heavily based on Season 7 Episodes 23 and 24, Hit and Run

“Thank you,” Emily says to the real estate agent as the two of you walk out of the house you had just looked at. You wave goodbye to him before turning to Emily with a huge smile on your face. 

“So?” you ask her, but she doesn’t match your excitement.

“I don’t know,” she says. 

“Come on Em? What’s not to know. It is a beautiful place and It is in our budget.” You say motioning toward the house. 

“Yeah, but there are cracks in the foundation.” You cross your arms over your chest. 

“Fair point, but cracks can be fixed.” She turns to you for the first time since you’ve stepped outside. 

“No they can’t, they can only be hidden. They are still there.” She says quietly. You tilt your head and look at her in confusion.

“Are you afraid that it is going to fall down or something?” you ask. 

“No,” she says with a shake of her head, “I’m just afraid it'll never be as strong as it used to be.” She wraps her arms around herself and looks down at the pavement. You move toward her and pull her into a hug. 

“It’s ok Em, we don’t have to get this place if you don’t like it.” You say as you caress her back. You feel her sigh against you. 

“People kill for opportunities like this, would we be crazy for walking away.” You pull back from the hug and interlace your fingers with hers. 

“If your gut is telling you to walk away, then we will listen to it. I trust you with my life Em,” you say as you look her in the eyes.

A small smile forms on her face before she leans forward and places a light kiss on your lips. Emily is about to say something when you get a call. Taking your phone out of your pocket you see that it is Hotch, so you answer. 

“(Y/N), is Emily with you?” He asks once you answer. 

Being that he is like the father you’ve never had, you didn’t hesitate to inform him of you and Emily’s relationship. He was even aware that the two of you were now looking for places to move into together. 

“Yeah she’s right here,” you say into the phone. 

“We need the two of you to get here as soon as you can, we have another case, and this one involves Will.”

\- - - - - - - - - - - - 

After the difficult case, Rossi had overheard Will proposing to JJ and had planned this beautiful wedding for them. Everyone was mingling until JJ and Will got here and the wedding started, but you noticed that Emily has been a lot quieter than usual. You see that she is standing in the other room by herself, so you make your way over to her. 

She smiles at you as she sees you approaching, but when she notices the look on your face the smile drops. 

“Emily, we need to talk.” You say as you approach her. 

“I don’t think that we do,” she says as she takes a sip of her drink. 

“I know you don’t want to talk about it but that is exactly why we need to talk about it.” You say matter-of-factly. “This has nothing to do with cracks in the foundation, does it?” 

“No,” she says with a sigh, “but it is a sign.”

“Please don’t get all free spirit on me,” you say with a roll of your eyes. 

“I almost blew up yesterday, twice,” she says seriously. “That is about as grounded as you could get.” You look at her face for a second as you try to decipher what she is thinking. 

“You want to leave don’t you?” you ask quietly. Emily pauses for a moment, startled before she responds. 

“I...I didn’t say that” she says as she stumbles over her words. You reach over to her and grab one of her hands in yours. 

“Emilly I know you, and I know that is the only reason that you would be this quiet.” Emily glances around at the other people at the wedding and drops her voice into a whisper. 

“Can we please talk about this later?” she asks, her eyes pleading with you. 

“No, Emily,” you say with a shake of your head, “how long have you been thinking about this?”

“Honestly?” You nod your head in response. “Since I got back.” 

Your mouth drops open and your eyes widen in surprise. You can feel the tears starting to form in the back of your eyes. 

“Really?” you ask, your voice coming out broken. 

“It’s not you,” she reassures you as she squeezes your hand, “I love you so much.” She pauses and takes a deep breath. “I just can’t grab onto my old life and pretend like nothing happened.”

“Is this about Easter?” you ask as your mind goes to the worst possibility. “Did something happen between you two when you were in London?”

“No! No, (Y/N), I swear it is nothing like that. Nothing happened between us, but he did ask me to run the London office.” 

“And you’re going to do it?” 

“I don’t know yet,” she says as her gaze drifts back down to her feet. “I thought that us buying a house and putting down roots was going to fix this feeling. That it was going to give me what I wanted, but it hasn’t.”

“You don’t want me?” you ask quietly as the first few tears start to run down your face. 

“No, that is not what I meant. You have been the one thing that has kept me here this long. There is just this part of me that feels lost and taking the job in London might help me find it.” Her eyes meet yours again and you notice that she has tears as well.

“You think I should stay?” she asks, her eyes searching yours for an answer. You take a deep breath and wipe away a few of your tears. 

“I think you should have mentioned to me that you were feeling this way. And I think that it is going to hurt like hell to have to lose you again. But if this is what you think you need, then I think I miss you already.” 

A sad smile comes onto her lips and she puts her drink down to pull you into a hug. The two of you stay in this embrace for a moment, relishing in each other's touch, before Garcia walks in and notices the sad look in both of your eyes.

“What?” She asks anxiously. 

“I will tell you later.” You say to her. Garcia looks frantically between the two of you.

“I do not like the sound of I’ll tell you later,” she says, fear in her eyes. You look down at your hands and try to hide the tears in your eyes. 

“It is JJ’s night, I don’t wanna ruin it,” Emily says gently.

“If you are going to tell me something bad to balance out the goodness of what is happening tonight then I will not have it. I don’t believe in that stuff, even though it is totally one of the truths of life, the bitter mixed in with the sweet…”

“Penelope hey calm down, ok?” Emily interrupts her and places a hand on her back. Emily gives you one last longing glance before she leads Garcia into the other room. You stand there alone for a second until Hotch notices you and walks over. 

“How are you?” he says once he gets close enough. You take a deep breath and give him a small nod while trying to figure out how to answer his question. 

“That bad?” he asks and you look up at him in surprise. 

“What?” you ask.

“That is your tell,” he says. 

“No it’s not,” you insist, but Hotch just gives you that all-knowing look “It is? For how long.”

“Uh I think ever since I have known you,” he says with his rare sarcasm. 

“Well I am not the only one mister, you have a tell too,” you say back to him. 

“Oh I do?” he asks with a small laugh. 

“Yeah you do but I can’t tell you what it is because then you will stop doing it.” The two of you share a short bit of laughter before a somber mood falls back over the room. 

“Is it about Emily?” He asks. You give him a small nod. 

“Do you want to talk about it?” Hotch asks you in a serious tone. 

“Definitely,” You say with a sigh. He looks at you expectantly but you glance back down and shake your head “but I can't. Not right now, not tonight.”

“My office first thing tomorrow morning?”

“Sounds like a plan.” He gently pats you on the shoulder before walking out of the room back towards Beth. 

The wedding ceremony was beautiful. JJ looked amazing and nobody from the team could keep their eyes off of her. Except for you, because yours kept drifting towards Emily. Your emotions were all over the place. You are angry because how could she want to leave all of this time and not think to tell you. Clearly she never truly loved you like she said she did. 

But at the same time, your heart broke thinking about how long she has been fighting this silent fight with herself. Longing for a part of her that was missing yet unable to let herself go and get it out of fear of hurting you and the team. You know that her leaving was the best choice for her, if only it didn’t hurt so much. 

After JJ walked down the aisle and said her vows to Will, everybody moved onto the dance floor as music played. You were being spun and passed around by all of the team members. You joked with Morgan as the two of you jumped around to the music. Teased Reid as he fumbled over his own feet trying to dance. Twirled with Rossi as he swept you off of your feet. And rested your head on Hotch’s chest as the two of you silently swayed to the music. Eventually, Emily made her way over to the two of you. 

“Mind if I cut in?” she asked Hotch. You untangled yourself from the safety of his fatherlike embrace and turned your attention to her. You effortlessly folded yourself into her arms and the two of you began to move to the music. 

“(Y/N),” she says softly. You lean forward and press your lips against hers gently. 

“Don’t talk Em, not tonight,” you beg as you look into her eyes. “You need to go to London, and this might be our last night together. So I just need you to hold me. Ok?” 

She nods her head and gives you a look of understanding. Her arms tighten around you and you tuck your head into the crook of her neck. The two of you stay like that for most of the night, silently saying your goodbyes.


	26. Hickey

You made a bet with yourself when you left the house this morning. How long would it take each team member to notice? 

Rossi would notice first. Probably the most observant man you have ever met, he would be able to tell if you got your nails trimmed. Luckily for you though, he likes to keep things to himself. So even though he would know, he wouldn’t tell anybody else. 

The complete opposite of him is Garcia. The second she knows something, the whole team knows. She would notice second. Probably within seconds of her seeing you for the first time that day. It was funny how much she paid attention even though she was the only person on your team who wasn’t technically a profiler. 

Next would be JJ and Tara. Not necessarily because they are the most observant of the bunch, but just because that’s who you are around the most. 

Next would be Reid. He wasn’t always the most observant, but considering he had an eidetic memory, he knew what you looked like every single day. So he would be able to tell if something was different than the day before. 

And Last would be Luke. He was so oblivious sometimes that you swore you could come into work one day with bright neon hair and he might not even be able to tell the difference. 

Overall you gave yourself about an hour before everybody at the BAU knew. Surprisingly though, it went nothing as you expected. 

“Why are you walking like that?” Luke asks the second you walk into the bullpen. You glare at him but ignore his words. Unfortunately, he wasn’t very quiet with his exclamation. 

“Are you hurt?” Tara asks as she looks over at you.

“No I am not hurt,” you say as you sit down at your desk. You let out an involuntary groan of pain that draws the attention of everybody around you. Even Spencer, who sits at the desk across from you, looks up from the files in his hands. 

“You’re definitely hurt,” JJ says as she gets up from her desk and moves towards you. 

“I pulled a muscle that’s it,” you say offhandedly as you look at the file on your desk. 

“Pulled muscles doing what?” Tara asks as she too moves closer to you.

“I had a coupon for a free yoga class and it was harder than I expected,” You say with a shrug of your shoulders. Luke walks over and sits on the edge of your desk, and laughs when he looks down at you. 

“Ok yeah “Yoga”,” he says with a smirk. 

“Yes, yoga,” You say as you give him a pointed look. 

“Yeah that hickey says otherwise,” he says pointing towards your collar bone. JJ and Tara’s interest has peaked, and they move over to also look at it. You cover it with your hand as you hear the two of them gasp. 

“It’s not a hickey,” you say defensively. 

“I don’t know (Y/N), it really looks like a hickey,” Spencer says as he leans back in his chair. 

“I’m not obligated to tell the four of you anything,” you say before turning back to your work fully intent on ignoring them. Garcia walks into the bullpen and Luke calls her over. 

“Garcia, come help us interrogate (Y/N).” Garcia narrows her eyes and walks over. 

“I’m not coming because you told me to, newbie. But my interest is peaked. Why are we interrogating (Y/N),” she asks as she joins the group. 

“It's nothing Garcia,” you say as you roll your eyes. 

“(Y/N) slept with someone last night,” Tara says with a smirk. Garcia’s mouth drops open and she looks at you. 

“I need to know everything,” she says excitedly. 

“There is nothing to know, I told you I pulled a muscle doing yoga, and that is not a hickey,” you say, exasperated. But they all find your annoyance funny, and they laugh. 

“Come on, there is no need to lie,” JJ says as she pats your shoulder. 

“Yeah, we are just curious,” Luke chimes in. 

“Just tell us a name,” Garcia says. 

“You know people who have sex more tend to be happier,” Reid says. 

“I plead the fifth,” you say as they keep bombarding you for answers. 

“Well maybe we should tell Unit Chief Emily Prentiss that you can’t go out in the field because of your “Yoga incident”,” Garcia says. 

“I can go in the field,” you say.

“Garcia is right (Y/N), we should tell Emily,” Luke says teasingly, “we would hate to see you get more hurt.” 

“Tell me what?” Emily says as she walks into the bullpen. All of you turn to her like you just got caught by the principal. She stands there and crosses her arms over her chest. 

“(Y/N), is there something that I need to know?” Everybody moves back to their desk and leaves you to fend for yourself. 

“No ma’am,” you say. She furrows her eyebrows at you and motions for you to follow her to her office. You get up and walk behind her, but not before turning and flipping off your fellow team members. 

Once you and Emily are in her office, you close the door and she moves over and closes the blinds. Once you have privacy, both of you relax and break into a smile. You wrap your arms around her neck, and she grabs your hips before placing her lips on yours. 

“What were you guys talking about out there?” she asks when you break apart. 

“They saw me limping and saw the marks you made last night and wanted to know who I had slept with,” you say with a laugh but she looks at you with concern. 

“I didn’t hurt you too bad did I?” You shake your head and kiss her lightly. 

“Not at all,” you whisper against her lips. She gives you a devilish smile as her fingers dig into your hips. Backing you against the wall, she attacks your lips with her in a passionate and fiery kiss. 

“Good, because I was hoping you could come to my place again tonight.”


	27. Two-Time Thing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning - Sexual Content/Smut

At around 11:30, the team piles into the lobby of the hotel exhausted from a long day of working a case. You, Emily, and JJ all collapse on the couches while Morgan and Reid argue about something, and Rossi and Hotch head to the front desk to get the room keys. 

“JJ, can you please tell Morgan that I am always right,” Reid calls over towards the three of you. 

“Boys stop fighting or you’ll be put in time out,” JJ calls back causing you and Emily to laugh. Just then Hotch and Rossi come back, but they are only holding 4 room keys as opposed to your usual 7. 

“We have to share?” Morgan says in disbelief. 

“It's ok,” Rossi says, “most of the rooms have two beds in them.”

“Most?” Morgan nearly shouts. 

“This is the only hotel available and they only had these 4 rooms left, Derek, there was nothing I could do about it,” Hotch says. Morgan rolls his eyes and turns to Reid who has a smug look on his face. 

“I am not sharing with pretty boy over here, he talks in his sleep.” JJ walks over and gently pats Morgan on the shoulder. 

“Calm down, you big baby, I can share with Reid and you can share with Rossi,” JJ says before turning to Rossi. “Which of the rooms have two beds?” 

“These two,” Rossi says as he holds up two of the room keys and hands one of them to JJ, “the other two have one queen.”

“Don’t worry, Morgan, I will spare you. Me and (Y/N) will take the room with the queen.” Emily says as she glances over to you. “If that’s ok with you?”

“Uh, yeah that’s fine with me,” you say. Morgan walks over to you and Emily and wraps his arms around you in a hug.

“Bless you,” He says before he grabs the key from Rossi and heads up to their room. Rossi chuckles before passing out the rest of the keys and following after Morgan. Emily turns to you with a smile and the two of you head up to your room. 

Once you get into the room you immediately drop your stuff by the edge of the bed and fall into it. 

“Oh my gosh, I am so tired.” You say as you feel the knots in your muscles relax against the soft mattress. 

“Too tired to check out this mini-bar?” Emily calls over towards you. Sitting up you look over to her with peaked interest. She turns around and holds up a can of beer in one hand and a bottle of wine in the other. 

“Pick your poison.”

After you and Emily had cracked open the wine and gotten comfortable, you turned on the tv to see what was on. Scrolling through the channels the two of you land on a romance movie. Not your first choice, but without many other options this would do. 

“This movie sucks, she has more chemistry with her friend than she does with any of the men,” Emily says angrily towards the tv. 

“You really think two friends that close can have romantic chemistry?” you ask as you take a sip of your wine. 

“Don’t tell me you can’t feel the sexual tension between those two,” she says as she motions at the tv. 

“All I am saying is that it’s not realistic. Who do you know in real life that has tension like that with their best friend and is straight?” You say with a roll of your eyes. 

“Us,” she says as she looks over at you with a smirk. You almost choke on your drink, but you quickly recover and shoot back the same smirk. 

“Who said I was straight?” The two of you lock eyes for a moment. Emily raises her eyebrow a bit before taking a slow sip of her drink and turning her attention back to the movie. 

Once the movie was over, the two of you had gone through the bottle of wine. As Emily gets off of the couch and stretches, her shirt rides up and you can see her midriff. You find yourself staring, despite your best efforts. 

“Wow, it’s late,” Emily says as she looks at the time on her phone. “We should get to bed if we want to be up in time in the morning.” 

The two of you move towards your bags and take out pajamas to change into. You pull your shirt over your head, and kick off your pants, leaving you in your matching bra and panties. You jump as you feel a pair of arms wrap around your waist. 

“You look so sexy,” Emily whispers in your ear as she presses her body against yours. Her hands roam up and down the sides of your body and you lean back against her. Her lips drift to your neck and she kisses the skin softly. You turn yourself around and look at Emily. Unlike you, she was still fully clothed. Her hands that were on your waist drifts down to grasp your ass.

“Are we really doing this?” you say, your lips centimeters away from hers. 

“I hope so, or else I am going to need to take the coldest shower ever,” she says, and then her lips are on yours like fire. 

You moan against her lips as she caresses your body. Her hands move up your back and undo the clasp of your bra. Stepping back, she watches you hungrily as you let the bra fall off of your shoulders. Grabbing your hand she moves you over to the bed and gently lays you down. 

“You look so amazing,” she says as she looks down at your body, causing you to blush. 

She moves onto the bed and places her body in between your legs. Leaning down, she kisses your collar bones and makes her way down your body. She looks up at you as she approaches your dampening lips. Tucking her fingers into the waistband of your panties, she slowly pulls them down your legs. 

“You’re so wet for me,” she says as she stares at your beautiful body. 

“And you’re wearing too many clothes,” you say to her, as you squirm under her gaze. No matter how much you enjoy what she is doing, you want to see her body too. Looking back up at your eyes, she seductively pulls her shirt over her head and her pants down her legs, before reaching behind her and undoing her own bra. She bends down and kisses your lips lightly before returning to what she was doing and making her way back down your body. 

You hold your breath in anticipation as you watch her slow mesmerizing movements. Finally, she is back down at your center and smirks at you before she closes her lips around your bundle of nerves. No matter how many people had been in the same position Emily is in now, nobody has ever made you feel this good. Her tongue laps at your clit and swirls around the sensitive bud, causing you to quickly unravel. 

Just when you think you can’t take any more, her fingers join her mouth and she pushes two inside of you. 

“God Em,” you cry out as your hands drift down to bury in her hair.

“Cum for me,” she says huskily. Hearing her voice sends you over the edge. Emily continues to work her tongue and fingers as you come down from your high. 

“Em, that was just the best,” you say as you try and catch your breath. 

“The best?” she asks you with a smirk as she moves up to lay next to you. “That is such an honor.”

She laughs playfully and you roll your eyes before you connect your lips with hers, tasting yourself on her tongue. Without breaking the kiss you roll over on top of her and press your thigh into her center. 

“(Y/N), you don’t have to,” she says, breaking the kiss but you shake your head. 

“You’re not having all of the fun Em,” you say before leaning down and capturing her lips again. Your chests are pressed together and you can feel her breathing quicken as you put more pressure on her core. 

You place fluttering kisses down her neck and move down to her breast. You kiss around her left nipple before taking it into your mouth and grazing your teeth across it. She arches her back up in pleasure. Emily starts grinding her hips on your thigh and you can feel how wet she is through her panties. 

She lets out quick gasps and breaths as she gets herself off on your thigh while you praise her nipples. You reach between the two of you and replace your thigh with your fingers and Emily quickly comes undone with your touch. You slide off of Em and settle back onto the bed next to her.

Once she has caught her breath, Emily turns on her side and pulls you closer to her.

“Who would have thought the tough Emily Prentiss likes to cuddle after sex,” you say with a laugh, but she just rolls her eyes at you. 

“Just come here,” she says and you tuck yourself into her embrace. You both just lay there for a moment as you listen to each other breathing before you drift off to a peaceful sleep. 

\- - - - - - - - - - - -

You wake up to the alarm ringing. It goes on for a few more seconds before you hear a groan and the alarm stops. 

“Hey,” Emily says groggily as she looks at you with a sleepy smile.

“Hey,” you say quietly. You are still tucked into her side and you don’t want to leave. You wish you could stay here forever but you know that you can't. 

“So, what happens now?” You ask. You feel her sigh and shift. 

“Well, we have about thirty minutes to get ready and get to work. You can shower first if you want. This could just be a one-time thing.”

You are filled with disappointment but you aren’t surprised. Things got out of hand last night but now that you have sobered up things will go back to normal. 

“Yeah, we can do that,” you say with sadness in your voice as you slip out of the bed and move to take a shower. But Emily reaches out and grabs your hand stopping you. 

“Or,” she says with a smirk, “we could shower together, and make it a two-time thing.” She gets out of bed too and moves closer to you. She puts her hands on your waist and you wrap yours around her neck. 

“Well, we would be saving water,” you say with a smile, and with an eager kiss, Emily pulls you into the bathroom.


	28. Stalker - Part 1

One more report, just one more, and you could go home. For the past two hours, you have been repeating this to yourself. It isn't like you have anything to show for it though. Only a few sentences are evidence of the hours you have spent agonizing over this report. In your defense, it isn’t very easy to concentrate when your phone is going off every 10 minutes. 

You and Reid were usually the last two people in the bullpen, but he was long gone, having finished all of his work ages ago. Now it was just you, sitting alone. Most of the lights were either dimmed or off completely, leaving you in the somber darkness. 

Giving up on getting any work done you put down your pen and lean back in your chair. With your eyes to the ceiling, you let out a deep sigh and run your hands over your face in exasperation. The thick silence around you feels so suffocating that before you even realize it, silent tears are running down your face. And the icing on top of the cake, your phone rings for the 8th time in the last hour. 

All of the emotions you have been holding in for weeks are suddenly drawn to the surface, as you grab your phone and throw it as hard as you can toward the wall across the room from you and let out a pained yell. Your whole body is shaking as large tears are now steadily streaming down your face, and you pull your knees to your chest and bury your face in them. 

You didn’t hear the door open or the footsteps approaching. You didn’t notice the concerned way Emily’s eyes trailed over your small figure or the way her hand twitched as she fought the urge to reach out and comfort you. But you did hear as she cleared her throat. 

You whip your head up in surprise and see Emily standing only a few feet behind your desk. 

“Emily I am so sorry I thought that I was here alone,” you say as you straighten up in the chair and quickly wipe the tears from your cheeks away. 

“You don’t have to apologize,” she says gently, but she remains standing where she is, analyzing you.

“Please don’t profile me right now Emily,” you say with a sigh as you run a hand through your hair. 

“I’m not,” she says as she moves closer to your desk, but you just give her a blank stare. “Ok maybe I was,” she admits, “but can you blame me. You are probably the most composed person on the team, and here you are in the middle of the night crying and throwing things. You have to admit it’s a little jarring.” 

“Fine Supervisory Special Agent Prentiss, profile me. Tell me what’s wrong,” you say defensively as you lock eyes with her. She walks over to your desk and leans against it as she looks at the mess of papers strewn across the top. 

“Well,” she starts, “this report I asked you to write up about the case earlier is still sitting here practically untouched, so either you just don’t want to do it, or there is something on your mind that has kept your attention away from it,” she says as her gaze moves back to yours. “But knowing your work ethic, I would say that it is the latter.” 

You shift uncomfortably under her stare, regretting getting yourself in this situation but not backing down. She narrows her eyes as they scan over your face. 

“You’ve been grinding your teeth together, you were doing it while we were on the case in New York too. Is this because of the case? We got there in time, (Y/N), nobody got hurt.” You scoff a bit at her and shake your head. 

“I guess you’re not as good of a profiler as I thought,” you say as you move to get out of the chair at your desk. But just as you stand up, Emily grabs your wrist gently and looks at you with pleading eyes. 

“Then tell me,” she says quietly. The two of you stand there for a moment before the ring of your phone breaks the silence. Emily’s head whips over to find the source of the noise, and she glances between you and your phone. 

“Are you going to get that?” She asks, but you just shake your head in response. 

“I’ll get it then,” she says as she walks over to the phone.

“Em wait don’t,” you try to call out, but she has already answered the phone and has it up to her ear.

“Hello,” she says into the phone, and you stand there holding your breath. 

“This is SSA Prentiss, who is this?” She says after she gets no response.

“He’s not going to say anything Em,” you say quietly, “he never does.” She looks at you curiously as she hangs up the phone. 

“(Y/N), what is this about?” you sink back into your chair and rest your head on the desk, physically and mentally exhausted. 

“I have a stalker,” you mumble out. Emily’s eyes widen in surprise, and she walks back over to you.

“Why haven’t you told anybody? We can help you,” she says as she kneels in front of your chair and tries to get your attention. You lift your head and look at her with tears brimming back in your eyes. 

“He told me not to,” you say your voice barely in a whisper. You open the drawer on the side of your desk and pull out the countless letters that he has sent you. Sorting through them, you pull out a photo he had sent you of your parent’s house and hold it up to Emily. 

“He knows where my parents live Em, I can’t afford to get on his bad side.” Emily looks at you with concern before she speaks slowly and gently. 

“(Y/N) this man can be dangerous,” she says, 

“He’s a lust-driven stalker Em. I don’t know who he is or where he first saw me but ever since he did, he thinks that we are in love. We both know that unless I provoke him, he isn’t going to hurt me.”

“So what are you going to do? Walk on eggshells for the rest of your life?” You sit there speechless, unable to find the right words because there simply weren’t any. Emily grabs your hands in hers and looks into your eyes. 

“Let us help you,” she says softly. Slowly, you nod your head as tears start to fall from your eyes again. Emily pulls you into a standing position before she wraps her arms around you and pulls you into a hug. She gently caresses your back as you take comfort in her loving embrace. Reluctantly, the two of you have to unwrap your arms from around each other, even though you wish you could stay here forever. 

“I’ll call the team in,” Emily says when the two of you pull apart. 

“No, Em, it’s the middle of the night, and we just got back from a case. Please let them sleep,” you beg. 

“Fine, but you’re not going back home alone tonight. You can stay with me.”

You agree to spend the night at Emily’s house, and the two of you start to gather your stuff, your reports and papers long forgotten. When the two of you are in the elevator heading down to Emily’s car, you turn to her and ask her a question. 

“Why are you doing this for me?” She seems to hesitate for a moment before she turns to you with an answer. 

“If you are asking Unit Chief Emily Prentiss, she would say that it is my responsibility to look out for everybody on the team when they are in trouble.” Emily pauses as she reaches over to you and takes your hand into hers. “But if you were to ask just Emily, it’s because I care about you, so much and it would kill me if anything happened to you.”

“Thank you,” you say before the elevator dings and the doors open. The two of you walk to the car together, hand in hand, and for the first time in a long time, you finally feel safe.


	29. Stalker - Part 2

After driving to Emily’s house, she shows you to her spare bedroom where you can spend the night. You tried to get comfortable and drift off, but no matter what you did, you couldn’t get yourself to fall back asleep. Eventually, you just give up, and you start to wander around Emily’s apartment. 

You’re not trying to be rude by invading her personal space, but you can’t just sit in your room all night. You make your way through the halls and into the living room, analyzing the decor she has on the walls on the way. You stop when you get to a framed picture of the entire team. 

You guys were all like family and had always been there for each other. You are suddenly filled with panic and regret at the thought of having to come clean with them about your situation. Just as you start to get too much in your head, you hear movement behind you and turn around to see Emily watching you carefully. 

“You can’t sleep either?” Emily asks, her body leaned against the wall across from you.

“No,” you say with a shake of your head. “but I haven’t been able to sleep much lately.” She gives you a look of understanding. 

“I have some chamomile tea in the cabinet if you would like some,” she offers as she motions to the kitchen. You give her a nod, and with a smile, she moves to put the water on to boil. 

You glance back at the photo one more time before you make your way over to sit on the couch. Shortly after, Emily joins you. 

“How long have you been getting these phone calls and letters?” She asks you as she sits on the couch cushion next to you. 

“They just started a couple of months ago,” you say in response, “I left the letters at the office, but I have pictures of them. Here.” You take out your phone and open the photo album that you keep the pictures in. Emily scoots closer to you to get a better look. 

“This is the first one,” you say as you hand the phone over to her. She takes it gently and the tips of your fingers brush against each other. You look over and catch her eye for a moment before Emily clears her throat and reads the letter out loud. 

“My love, today is our anniversary. It has been five years since I saw your true beauty and wanted to make you mine. Here is a gift to show how much I love you. Forever yours.”

She furrows her eyebrows and looks over at you. “Five years? That would’ve been before you joined the BAU.”

“Yeah,” you say with a nod, “I have been racking my brain trying to think who it could be but I keep coming up blank.”

“He mentions an anniversary. Could it be an Ex?” Emily asks you, but you just shake your head. 

“No, I’ve only dated women, and based on the way he writes and the few times that he has said something on the phone calls, it’s definitely a man.” You reach over and swipe the phone through the next few pictures. “Here read this one.”

“Why aren’t you answering my calls? I just want to hear your voice. Are you falling out of love with me (Y/N)? I’m not falling out of love with you, I fall more in love with you every day. Answer the phone. Forever yours.” 

“That was sent two weeks ago,” you say once she finishes reading. “I had stopped answering the calls and he got mad. He still gets mad sometimes when I don’t answer.” 

Emily looks over at you and can tell that talking about your stalker has gotten you worked up, so she shuts off the phone and lays it face down. She reaches over to you and grabs your hands while looking you in the eye. 

“We are going to catch this guy, ok?” She says gently. The only response you can give is a nod of your head. “As long as I am here he isn’t going to hurt you in any way.” 

“Thank you,” you say softly. As you look into her eyes, something in your chest tightens. Emily must’ve felt it too because she leans closer to you and places her lips against yours, gentle but firm. 

The kiss only lasts for a few moments, because suddenly, her tea kettle starts whistling. The two of you jump apart and Emily quickly gets up to take it off of the stove. Your brain feels like a jumbled mess of mixed emotions that you can’t make sense of. But what you do know, is that when you were kissing Emily, everything that you had been worried about, melted away. 

She comes back into the room, carrying two cups of tea. She sits them down on the coffee table, before apprehensively sitting back down next to you. The silence is thick and filled with awkward tension. 

“I’m sorry,” Emily says, “I really shouldn’t have done that. You are in a vulnerable state and I took advantage of that,” you cut her off by placing your hands on the sides of her face and pressing your lips against hers again. 

You kiss her a little rougher than you intend and end up throwing her off of her balance. She falls back against the arm of the chair, with you leaning over her. Her hands find your waist and pull you closer. Eventually, the two of you break apart, both of you breathless. 

Emily smiles up at your blushing face, as you gradually move off of her. She doesn’t let you get far though because she wraps her arm around you and pulls you into her side. Reaching over to the coffee table she hands you your tea before grabbing her own. 

The mood, which has before been somber and grim, is now light and happy as the two of you drift into an easy conversation, eventually drifting off to sleep on the couch, arms wrapped around each other. 

\- - - - - - - - - - - - 

The next morning, the two of you walk into Quantico, prepared to tell the team about your stalker. Your nerves are getting to you at the thought of revealing the secret you’ve been hiding for months, but Emily notices and grabs your hand in hers. 

She had texted everybody that there was an emergency and that they all needed to meet in the roundtable room, so as you walk in, all of your team members' heads turn to you in anticipation. Slowly you make your way to the head of the table and get ready to do one of the hardest things you’ve ever done...ask for help. 

You place all of your letters down on the table in front of them and clear your throat in preparation. 

“I’m being stalked,” you say, effectively getting everybody’s attention. “For about three months I have been getting these letters and phone calls from a man that claims he has had his eyes on me for the past five years. And I could use your help finding him.” You start to choke up at the end, as tears enter your eyes. 

Garcia immediately gets up from the table and throws her arms around you in a hug. You sigh a breath of relief as the rest of the team follows suit and joins the group hug. 

“We are here for you, kid” Rossi says as the hug breaks up and everybody moves to sit back down, “We are going to find this son of a bitch.”

After a quick overview from Emily, the team nods and dives into the letters. You and the team spend time reading, rereading, brainstorming, and shooting ideas to each other before Reid finally finds something that might be a little help. 

“Look here at this first letter that he sent,” Reid says while holding it up for everybody to see, “For the most part all of the writing looks the same, but if you look closely, this "w" right here is different.” 

“Yeah,” JJ says as she takes the letter out of Reid's hand, “It looks like it is written in a different font. But why would this one random "w" be written differently?” 

“Maybe it was an accident,” Tara suggests, but Emily just shakes her head.

“No, an unsub this calculated wouldn't have accidents.” She moves over and grabs another letter off of the table and examines that one. “Look here, this one has a letter in a different font too.” She shows the rest of the team and a look of understanding comes on everybody’s faces. 

With the help of everybody on the team, you place the letters in order and find the different fonts in all of them. Eventually, you discover the hidden message. 

“Will you marry me? I do, I do,” You say as you read it out loud. 

“So he sent all of these letters because he wants you to marry him?” Luke asks, but Rossi shakes his head. 

“If he is this in love with (Y/N), wouldn’t he find a better way to propose?” Rossi asks. 

“He’s not proposing,” you say. Everybody’s eyes turn to you. 

“How do you know that?” Luke asks.

“I don’t know for sure, but in the first letter, he mentions it is our fifth anniversary. He must mean it’s been five years since he first saw me. Five years ago my brother got married. I didn’t think it was important, but now that we have this,” you say as you motion to the phrase that the notes had spelled out, “That can’t be a coincidence, can it?.”

“So you think that this is his way of hinting who he is?” JJ asks. You just shrug in response. 

“I don’t know, but it could be.”

“What do you remember about that wedding?” Emily asks as she walks over towards you. 

“Not much,” you say with a shake of your head, “but I could do a cognitive if you think it’ll help.”

“Let’s go,” Emily says before the two of you walk out of the room. You make your way to Emily’s office and sit down in the chair next to her desk. Once she has sat down too, she looks at you with concern in her eyes. 

“How are you holding up?” She asks you gently. You force a smile. 

“I’m ok,” you say. You can tell she doesn’t believe you but she brushes it aside and starts with the interview. 

“Ok,” she starts talking as you close your eyes. “You are at your brother’s wedding, What do you see?”

“Uhm,” you start as you dive back into the memories of that day, “It was a beach wedding so sand, water, the arbor, all of your typical wedding stuff.”

“Did you notice anybody that you had never met before?” she asks you, but you shake your head. 

“I was a bridesmaid, so I didn’t really have any time to mingle until the reception.”

“Ok,” Emily says, “so let's move onto the reception. Did you notice anybody there that stood out to you?”

You furrow your eyebrows and try to put yourself in that moment to see if you can remember anybody, but you are at a loss. 

“I really can’t remember Em,” you say as you open your eyes and look at her. “It wasn’t a very memorable night. My mom was not a fan of my sister in law’s family, so she was complaining in my ear the whole night, I didn’t even get to enjoy myself until I left the party, and walked down to the beach where I…” you trial off as suddenly the memories come rushing back. 

“What?” Emily asks when she notices the look on your face. “What did you just remember?”

“I know who it is,” you say in a whisper. You shoot up from the chair, and race to the roundtable room with the rest of the team. 

“Mason Stewart,” you say when you walk through the door, Emily trailing behind you. Garcia immediately types that name into her computer to get any information she can about him. 

“Are you sure?” JJ asks as she walks over to you. 

“Yes,” you say with a nod, “I’m sure. He was my brother’s best man, they’ve been friends since they were kids. During the reception, I walked down to the beach to get away from my mother. I was only out there for a couple of minutes when he showed up. He started talking to me and joked that he wanted to get married to somebody like me someday. I played along like it was a joke, but I guess he was serious. He’s given me weird vibes since he was a kid, I should’ve known.” By the time you are finished with your speech, you are out of breath. 

“I got him,” Garcia says. “Mason Stewart, he has been unemployed for the last year, but I am sending his address to your tablets now.” 

“Luke and I will go to his house, see if he’s home,” Matt says before they walk out. 

JJ rubs your back and shoots you a smile.

“We got him,” she says happily, and you shoot her a smile back. 

“Today has been so hectic, I am going to splash my face with water,” you say to her, and the rest of the team that is still standing around. 

You make your way to the bathroom feeling light as a feather. They finally got him. Your months of torture can finally end, and you had Emily to thank for it. 

Once in the bathroom, you turn the faucet on and lean over to splash the water on your face, but when you look up your heart drops.

“How did you get in here, Mason?” You ask as you slowly and carefully turn around. 

“I thought we were a secret (Y/N),” he says as he takes a step closer to you. 

“We are a secret, I didn’t tell anybody,” you say, trying to hide your fear, but it doesn’t work. He takes the door to the bathroom stall and slams it, causing a loud bang to reverberate through the bathroom. 

“STOP LYING TO ME!” he screams causing you to jump. 

“I’m not,” you say quietly. He pauses for a moment, just looking you up and down. 

“Who were you with last night?” He asks, his voice dangerously low.

“She’s a friend,” you say. 

“You slept at her house,” he counters as he slowly makes his way closer to you. 

“Mason just listen,” you start to say but he interrupts you. 

“You kissed her,” he says. You freeze and your blood runs cold. If he saw that, then what else has he seen.

“Is she trying to come between us?” he asks. He is so close to you now that you can smell the alcohol on his breath. You try to back up, but you are pressed against the bathroom counter. 

“She’s not, I promise,” you plead desperately. His gaze roams up and down your body as he leans impossibly closer to you. 

“You look so beautiful,” he says against your lips before he takes them in a possessive and rough kiss, nothing like the ones you shared with Emily last night. Your body is stiff with fear, and you don’t kiss him back. When he pulls away from you his face is turned up in anger. 

“You don’t love me,” he says and suddenly you feel the sharp edge of a blade against your neck. 

“I do, yes I do. I always have,” you say as tears start to stream down your face. 

“You tricked me,” he says, raising his voice. 

“No, I didn’t, I didn’t,” you say. 

“YES YOU DID,” he screams in your face. You feel him apply more pressure to the knife before a gunshot goes off and his body crumples in front of you. Looking over to the door, you see Emily with her gun aimed where Mason just was. 

It doesn’t take long for people to come rushing to the bathroom after hearing the gunshot, but luckily, JJ was standing just behind Emily, and she manages to get them under control and explain the situation while Emily pulls you away. 

Once away from the crowd and safely in Emily’s office, She sits you down on the couch and looks you over. Your whole body is shaking as the adrenaline wears off and your brain is going a mile a minute, but Emily wraps her arms around you and holds you close. 

“It’s ok, you’re ok,” Emily whispers in your ear as you bury yourself deeper into her embrace. You eventually stop shaking and start to come back to your senses. 

“Are you ok?” Emily asks, her voice filled with concern. 

“Emily, why did you...how did you?” you ask, still trying to wrap your head around everything that has happened. 

“It felt like something was wrong so JJ and I came looking for you, I saw him with the knife held to your throat and instincts just took over,” She explains. 

“You just saved my life,” you say, amazed. 

“I’d never let anybody hurt you,” she says, and she leans forward and places a gentle kiss on your forehead, before standing up and pulling you with her. 

“Let’s get you home,” Emily says as she starts to walk out of the door but you stop her. 

“Em, you just shot a guy. Isn’t there going to be an investigation, shouldn’t you stay here,” you say but she just wraps her arms around you again. 

“Right now, you are the only thing I care about,” she says. A genuine smile comes onto your face, and Emily leads you out of Quantico and takes you to her house, where you relax for what feels like the first time in forever.


	30. Heavy

The only thing you notice when you open your eyes is a pounding in your head and a ringing in your ear. After blinking a few times your vision becomes less blurry and you look around trying to figure out where you are. All you see is rubble and ash and it all comes rushing back to you. 

“You don’t have to do this,” Emily says to the unsub. The two of you had just been heading to talk to who you thought was a witness, but once you got to his house, you realized he was the bomber you were looking for. 

“You want recognition right?” you ask, trying to buy time for the rest of the team to get there, “we can do that. Come with us and we’ll make sure you are on the news.” He looks between the two of you, panic in his eyes. He seems to be considering it for a moment before a look of determination hardens on his face. 

“If I kill two FBI agents I’ll be famous,” he says a smile forming on his face. 

“No, if you set off that bomb then you die in here with us and nobody will get to tell your story,” Emily says in a demanding manner. 

“Your team is on the way, they are profilers. They know more about me than I know about me. Let them tell my story,” just then he holds up the remote and presses the detonator and at the same time Emily jumps in front of you and tackles you, covering you with her body. Then your vision fades and your eyes drift shut. 

You try and sit up but are immediately flooded with a feeling of nausea. Taking another second to regroup you push yourself into a sitting position and immediately look around to find Emily. It doesn’t take long, because her unconscious body is laying only slightly to your right. 

She is covered in debris and small cuts litter her body, but what catches your eye is the large gash above her eyebrow. 

“Shit,” you say to yourself as you crawl over to her body to inspect the damage closer. It doesn’t seem to be that deep but it is bleeding a lot, but there is nothing within your grasp you can stop the bleeding with. 

“Ok come on Em, I need you to wake up,” you say as your place your fingers on her neck to check her pulse. You breathe a sigh of relief when you feel her slow but steady heartbeat under your fingertips. 

“Emily,” You call to her, but once again you don’t get a response. 

The smoke from the fire that the bomb had started works its way into your lungs and eyes and you start to cough. You start to realize that if you spend much more time sitting here waiting, you would probably both suffer from smoke inhalation. The team was probably still a good fifteen minutes away, so you only had one option. Well technically two, but there was no way you were leaving Emily in here to die. 

“OK, we got this Em, I’m gonna get us out of here.” You move to a kneeling position trying to figure out a way to carry her out of here. Grabbing her hands you gently move her to where she is sitting up, and then get her into a standing position with her body weight propped against yours. Turning around you hoist her onto your back in a piggyback sort of situation, and look around to try and find your best exit. 

When you are standing up the smoke is even worse, so you're having difficulty looking around and finding which way to get out. Finally, deciding to just walk in one direction and hope that it's right, you start to move, but immediately tears are brought to your eyes. A sharp pain shoots through your entire left leg, starting at your ankle and moving through your knee, but you have to keep going. 

As you limp through the house, the weight of Emily’s body on your back, there are pieces of the ceiling falling around you, but you keep your eyes forward and focus on getting out. Coughing and gagging on the smoke your head feels fuzzy and pain shoots through every part of your body, but there is no way you are going to let anything happen to Emily on your watch. 

You navigate your way through the building for a few minutes before finally approaching the front door. Relief fills your body, but only for a minute because as you try and turn the handle it doesn’t budge. 

“Something must’ve made the door jam shut,” you think to yourself. Tightening your grip on Emily, you turn to the side and ram your shoulder into the door, one, two, three times, before the woods cracks and splinters. Stumbling out of the house, you gently lay Emily down as you try and catch your breath. 

You take one deep breath of fresh air before the exhaustion catches up with you and the ringing in your ears comes back. You hear faint yelling and sirens before you collapse onto the ground. 

“(Y/N),” you hear a yell and slowly blink your eyes open to see JJ running over to you with paramedics. That was the last thing you saw before you drifted back off. 

\- - - - - - - - - - - - -

As soon as you wake up you know you’re in a hospital. They all have the same overwhelming smell of sterilization and blinding LED lights. 

You start to get your bearing around you when you notice that your throat feels like the Sahara Desert. You try to swallow to relieve some of the pain, but your mouth is just as dry as your throat. 

“Here drink some water,” you hear someone say as you are handed a cup. You look over to the voice and are met with raven hair and beautiful brown eyes. A huge smile forms on your face and you try to say something to her, but your voice comes out in a rasp. 

“Water first, talking later,” she says as she pushes the cup into your hands. You take it and down the whole cup in one sip. 

“Emily,” you say now that you are refreshed, “You’re ok?”

“Yeah, I’m ok,” she says with a small nod, “I have a concussion but all I really needed were a few stitches.” She points to the bandage over her eyebrow. “You should be worried about yourself. A concussion, smoke inhalation, and a fractured Tibia.”

She pauses for a second and silence fills the room as Emily looks at you, sadness in her eyes. 

“They said you saved my life, that you carried me out of the building after the bomb went off,” she says quietly. 

“Yeah I did, and it was not easy. Do you know how heavy you are?” you ask jokingly and Emily laughs, the mood immediately changing in the room to a more lighthearted one. 

“I am not heavy,” she says acting slightly offended. 

“You definitely are,” you say before reaching over and poking Emily’s bicep, “but it is all muscle.” The two of you laugh a bit more before a serious mood falls on the room again. 

“Seriously, (Y/N), I don’t even know how I could thank you.” You pause for a second before a smirk comes on your face. 

“Well if you really want to thank me, you can kiss me.” Emily is taken aback for a second before she lets out a small laugh. 

“Wow, being blown up makes you really bold,” Emily says with a smile and a slight blush working their way onto her face. 

“Well, I almost died and almost lost the most amazing person I’ve ever known on the same day. I think I'm allowed to go for what I want,” you say as you lock eyes with Emily. 

Her smile on her face grows wider, and slowly, she leans over you and gently places her lips against yours. Her hands find the side of your face, and yours find the front of her shirt. A few moments later, the two of you pull away, and perfect timing because not much longer the rest of the team walks into your room.

“She’s alive,” Morgan says as he walks over to the side of your bed. 

“You had us all worried, kid,” Rossi says and the rest of the team nods in agreement. 

“So do any of you know when I’m getting out of here?” you ask the whole team. 

“You can be discharged tomorrow, but you can’t return to work until that leg heals,” Hotch says in his stern fatherlike voice. 

“Come on, Hotch” you whine, “what am I supposed to do if I can’t work?”

“I’ll be out too, right Hotch?” Emily asks Aaron, and he nods in response. “That means I can keep you company,” she says as she turns back to you. “And maybe I can find a better way to repay you.” She gives you a sly wink that nobody else on the team notices and your heart fills with butterflies. 

“I think we could think of something."


	31. Anything For You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW - Descriptions of Self Harm

While everybody is distracted, you slowly sneak away from the group. Moving towards the bathroom door, with shaking hands, you turn the handle and walk inside. Once you’re in the bathroom alone, you close and lock the door behind you before letting out a breath it seemed like you had been holding for days. 

It wasn’t usually this bad. You could usually last the entire time you and the team were away on a case, but things are getting bad again. 

Reaching into your hidden jacket pocket, you pull out the blade and bandages you always keep with you. Placing it down on the counter, you stare at yourself in the mirror for a second. Like an angel and a devil, two halves of your mind are fighting with each other. 

Come on, you think to yourself, you know you don’t have to do this. Fight it. 

Just give in, it’ll help, the other half of you screams, just one little cut and things will feel better.

Silent tears run down your cheeks because you know what you’re doing is bad and you should stop, but you just can’t. 

Slowly and carefully, you roll up your sleeve as you grab the blade. Steadily you bring the blade down to your skin and make a line on your forearm. Shame and guilt fill your body as the blood runs down, but there is also a lingering sense of euphoria and relief. You run the blade across your skin two more times before rinsing off the blade and your arm and carefully wrapping the bandages around it. 

After cleaning up and making yourself presentable again you unlock the door and walk out of the bathroom to find Spencer sitting on a bench across from you. 

“Hey,” he says when he sees you. 

“Uh hey Spence,” you say cautiously, “what’s up?”

“Garcia found another witness that might have known one of the victims. We think that she can tell us more about if the victim had any enemies,” he says as his eyes study your body language. 

“Ok, let’s go then,” you say before starting to walk away but he doesn’t follow behind you. 

“Luke and Tara already went when nobody could find you. That’s when I figured that there was only one place where you could be. So I have been sitting out here for the past twenty-one minutes and forty-three seconds so that I could talk to you,” he says with pleading eyes. 

“There is nothing to talk about,” you say as you cross your arms over your chest and turn around to start walking away from him. 

“Yes there is (Y/N),” he says as he walks after you. 

“I’m fine,” you say, all though it’s not very convincing. 

“We are going to talk and I'm not taking no for an answer. I figured you would want some privacy, but if you want to keep walking we can have this conversation in front of the team,” he says forcefully causing you to stop in your tracks. Spencer has never used that tone of voice with you before. 

“You don’t want people to think that you’re weak, but you know that we won’t because we are your family. This team is your family. You can’t keep hiding this for long, and I think that deep down, you know that, and you want somebody to help you,” he says.

With a glance around, you find an empty office and grab Reid’s hand pulling him in after you and closing the door behind you. You let out a shaky breath before turning back around to look him in the face. 

“Reid stop it, stop doing that. Stop getting in my head,” you say as tears start to form in your eyes. 

“I only want what’s best for you,” he says gently. 

“I don’t need you to take care of me, Spencer, I am fine,” you spit back. 

“You need help. You need to talk to a professional, or at least somebody else on the team,” You scoff and roll your eyes at him. 

“You’re one to talk Reid. Do you want me to walk out there right now and tell JJ you’ve been taking Dilaudid again?” He stands there speechless for a second and you can tell that a million thoughts are running through that big brain of his. 

“We have this deal for a reason Spencer,” you say with a sigh, “You get to keep your secrets and I get to keep mine.”

“Screw the deal,” he says with a shake of his head, “I’m worried about you.” Your face hardens and you take a step closer to him. 

“Spencer, I love you and you are my best friend, but don’t make me do something we will both regret.” You can see that he takes a second to contemplate his choices and when he is done, he looks back at you. 

“I won’t tell anybody,” he says, his voice a whisper. 

“Thank you,” you say as you breathe a sigh of relief. 

“Just make sure you’re being safe,” he says quickly before he ducks his head and walks out of the office. Composing yourself for the second time today, you follow Reid and head back out. 

\- - - - - - - - - - - - 

*Emily’s POV*

“Hey Reid,” I call out as I walk over to Spencer, “did you find (Y/N)?” He seems startled as I approach him like I’ve interrupted some deep thought. 

“Uh, yeah, yeah I found her,” he says, not taking his eyes off of the map he was working on in front of him. 

“So where is she now?” I ask

“I’m not sure,” he says quickly before turning to me pointing at something on the map. “Matt said something earlier about the Unsub possibly using a boat so if you look at it from that angle then that drastically widens the…”

“Reid,” I say, interrupting him, “What is going on?”

“Wh-what do you mean?” he stutters out while turning back around to circle some more things on the map. 

“If something is going on then as your Unit Chief I need to know about it,” I say slightly agitated but more worried than anything else. Reid doesn’t answer, instead, he just stands there with his back to me. “Is there something that I should know?” I ask him again. 

“Yes,” he says quietly as he turns back around to face me, “But I can’t tell you about it.”

“Ok,” I say questioningly, “and why can’t you tell me about it?”

“Because I made a deal,” he says as his gaze moves down and glues to the floor. 

“With who Reid?” I ask, adding some force behind my words. 

“With (Y/N),” he looks back up to me with a guilty look in his eyes. My heart drops and my mind fills with concern. 

“Is she in some sort of trouble?” I ask and he shakes his head in response. 

“No it’s not like that, It’s complicated but I swore it would stay between the two of us,” he says before picking up some papers off of the table in front of him. “I need to go see if the police chief knows anybody suspicious that lives by the coast.” With those final words, he pushes past me and walks out of the room leaving me standing there alone more confused than I was before. 

\- - - - - - - - - - - -

*Reader’s POV*

Later that day the team had called it a night and headed back to the hotel. Bright and early the next morning, the team has to wake up and get to work. Coincidentally, you Spencer and Emily were all in an SUV together for the short drive from the hotel to the police station. The ride was uncomfortably silent as Emily kept her eyes on the road and Spencer glanced over at you occasionally. 

“Are you two ok?” Emily asks halfway into the ride. 

“Yes,” the two of you shoot back at her at the same time, before glancing at each other and quickly turning away. 

“Yeah that was very believable,” Emily mumbles under her breath before turning her attention back to the road. 

“Whatever secrets the two of you have are going to come out eventually,” Emily says. 

“Just drop it, Emily,” Spencer says back. 

“I’m just trying to help you guys. Clearly, something is going on and I can’t do anything about it if you don’t let me,” Emily says with a slight rise in her voice. 

“Yeah well nobody asked for your help,” Spencer shoots back, raising his voice as well. 

Just then, Emily puts the car in park and you jump out as quickly as you can leaving the two of them in the car arguing.

You jump into your work and not long afterward Emily and Spencer find their way into the building. They both look pissed and storm off in opposite directions. Throughout the day, you don’t miss the glances both of them shoot in your direction or the subtle ways they tried to get your attention. 

This whole situation has made you tense, and by the time lunch comes around you feel like you can’t take it anymore. For the second time this week, you find yourself closing yourself back into the bathroom. With your brain clouded with so many thoughts and emotions, you bring the blade down on your skin without a second thought. When you finally regain some control you examine your mess and realize how many jagged cuts you’ve made. Suddenly you hear the door swing open. In your daze, you must have forgotten to lock the door behind you. 

“Oh my god,” Spencer says as he sees the mess that you have made of yourself and the bathroom counter. 

“It’s fine,” you say to him, “it just looks bad I promise.” He grabs as many paper towels as he can and wraps them around your forearm. He is panicked, but all you can do is stand there. 

“The blood’s not stopping,” he says as the towels quickly fill with blood, “how deep did you cut?”

“I don’t know,” you say shaking your head. He looks up at your eyes and they speak a silent apology. 

“I’m going to get Emily,” he says as he moves away from you and starts to walk out of the door. 

“Spencer! No, wait,” you call after him, but he is already gone. Exhausted, either from the strain of the day or due to your loss of blood, you lean against the wall and slowly find yourself sitting on the floor. Moments go by before he throws the door open and rushes into the bathroom again, this time with Emily trailing behind him. 

Panic fills her face and she rushes over to you and kneels next to you. 

“Reid, call an ambulance,” she shouts to Spencer behind her. He nods his head before leaving the bathroom presumably to find a phone. 

“Emily stop, I'm fine,” you say but she ignores you. 

“No you’re not,” she says as she holds the towels on your arm. 

“It’s very unlikely for anybody to die from slitting their wrist, Emily, I’m surprised Spencer didn’t give you the statistics,” you try to joke but Emily doesn’t laugh, instead she looks at you with tears in her eyes. 

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Emily asks you, her voice breaking as she speaks. 

“I’m sorry Em, I couldn’t,” you reply and the two of you just sit there until the paramedics get there and you are loaded into the ambulance. 

You were right. There was a very low chance of you dying, so the paramedics weren’t worried. Besides all that they could do was give you stitches for some of the deeper cuts you made. They still took you to the hospital though, and that is where you are now, waiting for your discharge papers. 

You are sitting on the edge of the hospital bed, and Emily is standing on the other side of the room leaning against the wall. The two of you had said very little to each other on the ambulance ride over and even less since you’ve been at the hospital. 

“Em,” you say quietly, breaking the silence but she just shakes her head in response. 

“We don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to.” Her words might have said one thing, but you knew that she wanted to talk. With a wave of your hand, you motion for her to come over and sit next to you, and she does. Once she is seated next to you she looks you in the eye. Her gaze is filled with pain and worry. 

“Is this what you were hiding?” She asks gently and you nod in response. 

“Spence found out one day when he showed up to my apartment. I made him swear not to tell anybody,” you say. 

“You could’ve told me you were struggling, (Y/N),” she says as she scoots closer to you. 

“So you could take me out of the field and send me to a shrink? That would’ve just made things worse.” You break your eye contact with her and look down at the floor. The two of you sit in silence for a second before you feel Emily take your hand in hers. 

“Hey,” she says, “can you look at me please?” You pull your gaze from the floor and look back at Emily. “This does not make you less of a person, and it definitely doesn’t make you less of an agent. Admitting that you need help is the strongest thing a person can do.” Tears start to fill your eyes and you take a deep long breath. 

“I need help Em,” you say softly as the first tear streams down your face. She pulls you close to her and wraps her arms around you in a comforting and safe embrace. 

“We are going to get through this, I promise you,” she says as holds you. 

“We,” you ask as you pull back from the hug just enough to see her face. 

“Yes, “we”,” she says with a smile, “you might’ve been dealing with this alone before, but not anymore. I’ll be right here by your side.”

“Em you don’t have to...” you start to say but are interrupted.

“I know, but I want to. I’d do anything for you,” she says. You throw yourself back into Emily’s warm arms and relish in her comfort. 

“Thank you, Emily” you mumble into her shoulder. And the two of you stay like that until the doctor comes back.


	32. Happy New Year

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A couple of New Years themed Imagines, xoxo

Resolutions 

January first was nothing special. You had spent the night before ringing in the new year alone, and then woke up bright and early the next morning to go to a normal day of work. 

As you walk into the BAU, you notice a particular figure slouched over their desk. With a small laugh to yourself, you make your way over. 

“Somebody looks like they are nursing a hangover,” you say as you pat Morgan on the back. He gives you a dirty look in response. 

“I don’t get hungover,” he says groggily. 

“Oh really,” you say in response before picking up the coffee sitting on his desk and examining it, “then why does it look like this cup is filled with jet fuel.” He snatches his cup back from you and you laugh again. 

“I always drink my coffee like this for your information.”

“Yeah ok, whatever you have to tell yourself big guy,” You get yourself settled down at your own desk just as JJ comes walking over, a pile of papers in her hands. Morgan notices and groans. 

“Please tell me you aren’t bringing those to us,” he says to JJ who just gives him an apologetic look. 

“Unfortunately, no serial killers had the new year’s resolution to turn a new leaf this year,” she says as she hands the two of you files to go through. 

“Speaking of, I want to know what your resolution is, Mr. Hotstuff,” you say to Derek. He looks up at you and smirks. 

“My resolution is to hit the gym more,” he says as he flexes his biceps. You and JJ look at each other before rolling your eyes. 

“Nope,” JJ says with a shake of her head, “that can’t be your resolution, you already go to the gym.”

“But I want to go to the gym MORE,” Morgan says. 

“If you go to the gym any more, your muscles will have muscles,” you say sarcastically. 

“Well the ladies don’t love me for my brain,” he says with a wink, causing both you and JJ to groan. 

“Well,” JJ says as she props herself against your desk, “My resolution is to be home more for Will and the boys.”

“That’s a good one Jayge,” you say, “don’t know how obtainable that would be with our schedules though.” She gives a nod of understanding.

“Well, what’s yours?” Morgan asks you. 

“My resolution is to be bolder,” you say with a shrug. 

“Bolder?” JJ asks.

“Yeah, like more daring. I want to go after what I want.”

“Well you might be able to start right now,” Morgan says cheekily. 

“Huh?” you ask confused. He motions behind you and you turn around to see Emily walking through the door. 

“Are you going to be bold and finally tell Emily how you feel,” Morgan asks, drawing your attention back to him. 

“That’s not what I meant,” you stutter out, embarrassment filling your face at your crush being exposed. 

“Technically, that would count as your resolution though,” JJ says, causing you to whip your head around to look at her in disbelief.

“JJ, you are supposed to be on my side,” you say, feigning offense, but she just laughs it off. 

“If it means anything, Em’s resolution is to be more vulnerable,” Morgan says, “I think you should go for it.”

“But for now,” JJ interjects, “You two have paperwork to finish.” With that she heads back to her office, leaving you to think about what the heck you were going to do. 

A couple of hours, and many papers later, it is finally lunchtime. Deciding to take Morgan and JJ’s advice, you walk over to Emily’s desk. 

“Hey Em,” you say as you approach her. 

“Hey (Y/N),” she says as she looks up at you. 

“Uhm, I was about to head out to lunch, do you wanna come with?” Your palms are sweating and your heart is beating a mile a minute while you wait for her answer. Luckily though her face breaks out into a smile. 

“Yeah, I would love to get some lunch,” she says as you sigh a breath of release and smile back at her, “Just let me put these files away and we can go.”

The two of you go to this great cafe, not far from the office to grab lunch. Your meal was great and Emily was great company, but now you had to find a way to get your courage up and admit your feelings. 

“So Em,” you say as the two of you sit there waiting for the check. She looks at you expectantly. 

“Yes?” she asks. 

“Uhm, so like this was fun and we should do it again,” you stammer out. 

“Yeah we should do lunch again,” she responds. 

“Well yeah, but what I meant was more like…” you start to say, but are interrupted by Emily’s phone dinging. 

“Oh no,” she says as she looks at the text.

“What’s wrong?” you ask. 

“My neighbor just called to say Sergio has been meowing like crazy all morning. It’s not that big of an issue, but would you mind if we stopped by just so I can check on him?” she asks. 

“Yeah, of course. Let’s go.”

When you get to her apartment, Emily heads to her bedroom to check on Sergio. You let her do her thing while you stand in the living room trying to muster up some courage. You decide that you need to put on your big girl panties and just do it. As she walks back into the living room, you reach out to grab her arm causing her to stop and turn to you. 

“I made a resolution,” you blurt out. Em looks at you with confusion but decides to play along. 

“Ok, what was your resolution?” She asks. 

“To be bolder and to go for what I want.” She gives you a nod of understanding. 

“And how has it been going so far?” she asks. 

“Not so good,” you say with a shake of your head. 

“Why not?” she looks at you and you finally lock eyes with her. 

“Well,” you say as you take a deep breath, “I am trying but it’s a little scary.”

“What are you scared of?” you notice that both of your voices have dropped into a whisper, loud enough for only each other to hear. 

“I’m scared that what I want doesn’t want me back,” you admit. Emily gives you a soft smile and your gaze drops to her lips. 

“Well, you’ll never know unless you try right?” she asks. The two of you had instinctively been moving closer to each other this whole time, and now you were standing so close that you could feel her breath on your face. 

“Right,” you say lightly before closing the distance.

Your lips meet hers and time stops. The butterflies that had been in your gut all day had migrated, and now it felt like your whole body was filled with them. Emily’s hands play in your hair as yours find their way to her waist. You stay connected like that for a moment more before pulling away, breathless and giddy. 

“I made a resolution too,” she says as the two of you stand there still tangled in each other’s arms. 

“To be more vulnerable,” you say with a small nod, “Morgan told me.” 

“Well this is me being vulnerable,” she says as her hands move to cup the side of your face. “You are amazing and beautiful and smart, and I love being around you. I’ve also wanted to kiss you since the day we first met.”

You stand there just staring up at Emily, surprised that any of this is even real. A happy giggle makes its way into your throat and soon enough the two of you are laughing, joy filling the room. When you’ve settled down and caught your breath, Emily pulls your body closer to hers and brushes her nose against yours. 

“I think this is going to be a pretty good year,” she says against your lips before she captures them in another wonderful kiss. 

Long-distance 

*Emily’s POV*

I walk into my apartment to silence and emptiness. You would think that I would’ve gotten used to it by now, but it never gets any better. I put down my things and go to the kitchen to pour myself a glass of scotch. I know, I know, it’s a little stronger than your average New Year’s Eve beverage, but right now it’s what I need.

Looking out of my window, I see people littering the streets. They are lighting firecrackers, dancing, and playing music. It’s freezing outside but they seem invincible. Nothing can break their stride because they are bringing in the new year with the people that they love. Taking a sip I can feel the relieving burn travel down my throat. 

As I move to the living room and turn on the tv, I see that there are only a few minutes until midnight. Picking up my phone, I dial the all too familiar number. But it just rings, and rings, and rings, until the voicemail picks up. 

“Hey,” I say into the phone, “It’s almost midnight here, I was hoping we could spend it together but I see you’re busy. Call me back, love you.” 

I lay the phone face down, and take another long sip of the drink in my hand. The announcer on the tv says it’s almost time. I can hear everybody counting down, nothing but excitement in their voices. 

“10..9..8..7..6” My cup is empty so I walk back into the kitchen to pour some more. The tv fades as I get farther away, but I can still hear it. “5..4..3..2..1!”

The fireworks go off and the whole city rejoices. All except me, sitting in my kitchen cold and alone. 

*Reader POV*

Luckily, the team was able to catch and arrest the unsub before midnight, which gave you all plenty of time to do whatever you needed at the BAU, and then head out and spend New Year’s Eve how you pleased. 

When you walk into your apartment you notice that you have a few missed messages and phone calls. Most of them were from family and friends, basically just wishing you a Happy New Year, but there was one in particular that made your heart drop. Emily. 

You listen to the voicemail and look at the clock. With 10 minutes till midnight, you quickly call her back. The phone rings a couple of times before you finally hear her answer. 

“Hello?” she says groggily. 

“Hey Em, I’m sorry I didn’t mean to wake you up,” you hear some shuffling on the other side of the call and assume that is her moving around in her bed.

“It’s fine,” is all that she says in response. The thick silence fills the call as neither one of you want to say the first thing. 

“I called you,” Emily finally says. 

“I know, I listened to your voicemail. I would’ve answered but we were on a case and I guess I had my ringer turned off.” As you are talking to her you move into your kitchen and pick which wine you are going to pour for yourself tonight. 

“I wanted to ring in the New Year with you,” Emily says, her voice sounding defeated. 

“I’m sorry. But we’re talking now and it’s about to be midnight for me,” you say trying to bring some excitement into your voice. 

“I know, it’s just,” she pauses and you hear her sigh, “We haven’t had a chance to talk all week and I miss you.” 

“Maybe things are getting too hard Em.” You blurt out before pausing. You don’t know why you said it, and you didn’t mean to say it. But now that it is out there, you are starting to think that it is right. 

“You think we should give up?” Emily asks, the tension growing in her voice. 

“No I just.” you pause trying to think of the right words, “we are both so busy as it is and then trying to make time… I mean is it worth it?”

“I can’t believe you’re saying this. I can’t believe after everything you’re quitting on me,” Emily says, raising her voice. Anger starts to rise in you and you can no longer contain it. 

“You cannot be mad at me Emily. You are the one that moved to London. You made that decision, not me!” you practically scream at her. She pauses and the line goes silent for a moment before she starts talking again. 

“What are you saying?” she asks you. You take a deep breath and run a hand through your hair. 

“Maybe this is the end.”

“We can keep trying, we can make it work,” she says practically pleading. 

“We’ve been trying Em. Tell me the truth, are you really happy with how things are going?” She doesn’t respond, but that’s all of the response that you need. 

“I’m sorry (Y/N),” she says softly. You can hear the tears in her voice. 

“Me too,” you say, as tears start to form in yours too. 

“I guess this is it then?” she questions. 

“Yeah, I think it is.”

“I love you,” she says over the phone as her voice cracks. 

“I love you too.” You hear the phone hang up but you don’t move. Still standing there with the phone held to your ear you feel the first of many tears stream down your face. In the distance, you can hear the people in the apartments around you counting down. As they get down to one, celebrations erupt. 

What a way to start the year, you think to yourself, before downing the entire glass of wine that you had poured and heading to bed.


	33. Worth It? - Part 1

You can’t help but replay in your head all of the things you missed. The looks, the touches, the subtle flirting. The things she didn’t think you would notice, but you did, even if you didn’t want to believe it. 

Your relationship with Emily was great in the beginning. The two of you had met at a bar when some creep was hitting on you. She came over and pretended to be your friend to get him to back off. The two of you talked all night and stayed in touch after that until eventually, she got up enough courage to ask you out on a date. 

That was two years ago, and everything had been going good so far, or at least you thought they were. You moved in together not that long ago, hoping the two of you would grow closer, but lately she’s been staying away from home. But that is just because of her job...right? I mean especially now that she is the unit chief, of course, it means more work. So why did her absence make you feel so uneasy? 

You didn’t figure out why until you were finally invited to one of Rossi’s famous parties. The lavish dinners he would hold where Emily came home half drunk off of wine, pasta, and good company. God, you were so excited. You bought a whole new outfit because nothing in your closet felt good enough for the BAU family you had heard so much about. 

How does the saying go? Ignorance is bliss? Well whoever said that hit the nail on the head, ignorance certainly is bliss. That must have been why no matter how much the logical side of your brain told you that something was happening, your heart never let you believe it. Until you had no other choice.

The party was great, for the most part. I mean there were times where Emily would disappear and leave you alone, but the team made you feel like family. 

Shortly before the party was over, you were trying to find Emily so the two of you could leave. But after searching for her everywhere you came up empty-handed. You did however run into Penelope. The perky blonde smiled at you, but it felt forced. Like she was hiding something. 

“Penelope is there something going on with Emily?” You ask, and immediately the smile falls off of her face. 

“Of course not,” She says nervously.

“I might not be a profiler, but I have dated one for a couple of years. I know you’re lying,” you say as you cross your arms over your chest. 

“Ok fine,” Garcia says with a sigh, “but I feel really bad for telling you this.”

“Garcia just tell me,” you say, growing impatient. 

“You have to promise me you won’t shoot the messenger,” she insisted. You roll your eyes and hold your pinky out. 

“I pinky promise, OK?” you ask, and with a nod, Garcia locks her pinky with yours. “Now can you please tell me what’s going on with Em?” Garcia seems to take a shaky breath before she looks at you with pity in her eyes. 

“I think she’s been cheating on you,” she says softly. Your blood goes cold and you feel frozen in place. Your worst nightmare has come true.

“(Y/N)?” Garcia asks softly when she sees the look on your face, “Are you ok?” Snapping out of it you look back over to Garcia. 

“No, not really,” you say as tears form in your eyes. “How do you know?”

“I was going to deliver some files to her office yesterday, and I saw her in there,” she pauses, “kissing JJ.” At those last words, your heart shatters into a million pieces, but at the same time, every bone in your body is lit aflame with anger. 

“I knew it,” you say with a sharp, pained laugh. Looking back at Garcia, you force a smile and thank her, before turning around and walking away. As you make your way back to the party, your emotions keep switching between despondent and relieved. This weird mix of feelings clash and leave you feeling numb and empty. Finally, you find your girlfriend, if you can call her that for much longer, and the two of you head home. 

That night, as you walked into your apartment, Emily was drunk and happy. But you, you weren’t. As Emily gave you a sloppy kiss on the cheek and headed to bed, you sat and thought, only getting about an hour of sleep that night. 

When Emily wakes up the next morning, you are already awake and sitting in the living room. As she walks in she stops in her tracks and notices the luggage and suitcases that you have lying around you. 

“You’re packing?” she asks after she has taken a second to try and register what is going on. You look over at her and shake your head. 

“Nope,” you say, popping the P. 

“Then why is this luggage sitting out here,” she asks as she motions to all of the bags. 

“It’s yours,” you say, as you take a sip of the tea you had made that morning to calm yourself down. 

“What is happening?” she asks as she moves over to you, “I am confused,”

“Really because I’m not,” you say, as you finally turn your whole attention to her.

“What are you talking about (Y/N)?” She asks as she crosses her arms over her chest in a defensive manner. You put down your tea and stand up as calmly as you can. 

“Were you ever going to tell me?” you question. Her jaw clenches and you can tell she has caught on to what you are saying. “Or did you think that I just wouldn’t notice?” you continue, the heat steadily rising in your face. 

“How did you find out?” Her voice has dropped into a whisper, and her gaze has moved to the floor. Almost as if she is embarrassed that she got caught. 

“I’ve had my suspicions for a while now, but they were finally confirmed when I learned about what you guys do in your office at work.” She sighs and runs a hand through her hair. 

“Garcia told you?” She questions, and you nod.

“Yeah, Garcia told me. Even though we just met, she’s been more honest with me than you ever have.”

“I didn’t want to hurt you,” she says as she finally looks back up at you, but you scoff and move away from her. 

“You didn’t wanna hurt me? Were you so focused on her this whole time that you didn’t notice how I was hurting every single day I watched you spend less and less time with me?” you say as you point an angry finger at her. 

“Yesterday was the first time we actually did anything,” she says defensively, and you throw your hands up in exasperation. 

“God Emily I don’t fucking care if you were screwing like rabbits every day that we were together. This is not about JJ, it’s about you. You deliberately chose to lie for months instead of telling me the truth. If you don’t fucking love me anymore at least have the decency to tell me that.” 

There are tears in her eyes and she tries to take a step closer to you but you match that with a step backward.

“I do love you, I just,” she says before pausing.

“Just what Em?”

“I don’t want to lose either of you.”

“Yeah well, it doesn’t work like that. I hope she was worth it because I am done, Emily. I can’t do it anymore.” After these words, you grab the bags you had spent all night packing and angrily throw them in Emily’s direction. 

“I’m sorry, (Y/N),” is all she says as she stands in the same spot, her eyes glued to you. 

“You’re sorry?” you question with a pained laugh, “You are fucking sorry?” Emily jumps back as if creating distance will protect her from your fury.

“I don’t know what else you want me to say,” she says, and you finally lose it. 

“I wanted you to say it isn’t true. I wanted you to say that Garcia got it wrong. And If you didn’t say that, I at least wanted you to say that it was a mistake and you regret it and you don’t know what came over you and it’ll never happen again. I wanted you to say anything other than you are fucking sorry because guess what, Sorry doesn’t cut it anymore Emily.” You scream at her.

Tears are running down your face but you don’t feel them. You barely register anything as you stand there breathing heavy and fist balled as you try to contain the urge to kick, scream, and fight anything that dared to come near you. 

“We can talk about this,” she says as she starts to move closer to you again, but you hold up a hand to stop her. 

“Get out,” you say, in a quiet voice. 

“But,” she starts to say but your gaze moves to hers and you shoot daggers with your glare. 

“I didn’t stutter, get the fuck out of my house,” you say with your teeth clenched.

Slowly she grabs the bags that you had packed for her and makes her way outside, not without a few more apologetic glances your way. As you close the door behind her you collapse against it and slowly slide down until you are sitting on the floor. With your head in your hands and your knees curled under you, you sit there and cry, until you can’t cry anymore.


	34. Worth It? - Part 2

*Emily’s POV*

It’s been two weeks since (Y/N) kicked me out. I’ve been sleeping at the office because I am too embarrassed to ask anybody else to let me crash at their place. One night, while I am waiting for everybody else to leave, I get a visit from Derek as he stops by before he heads out. 

“Are you ok Emily?” he asks as he peeks his head into my office. 

“Yeah,” I say as I let out a breath of air, “I’m good.” He raises an eyebrow at me before walking over and standing next to my desk.

“You want to tell me the truth or keep lying?” He asks as he looks at me suspiciously, but I just shake my head at him. 

“I can’t tell you the truth or you’ll think I’m an awful person,” I say, as I lay my head in my hands. 

“Try me,” he says as he leans against my desk. 

“I did something bad, Derek, something really bad.”

“You kissed JJ,” he says matter of factly, causing my head to shoot up at him in surprise. “You know Garcia can’t keep anything to herself.” 

“What did she tell you?” I ask, fearing whatever answers that he is going to give. 

“Just that she walked in on you kissing JJ and you made her swear not to tell anybody. But when she saw (Y/N) at Rossi’s, she just couldn’t help herself and had to tell her.” I open my mouth to respond, but he keeps talking. 

“Wait there is more. She also mentioned how you betrayed (Y/N)’s trust and how you didn’t even have the audacity to tell her that you didn’t love her anymore.”

“Wait,” I say, interrupting him, “(Y/N) said that to me during our fight almost word for word. How did Garcia know about it?” He responds with a shrug. 

“Apparently, (Y/N) called Pen all hysterical after she kicked you out. Don’t ask me how she got her number or why she would call Garcia of all people, but they’ve been keeping in contact or something.” Morgan says as he waves his arms through the air nonchalantly. 

“How is (Y/N)? Is she doing ok?” I ask him, pain evident in my voice. 

“I don't know Em, she talked to PG not me,” he says with a shake of his head. 

“I need to talk to her, but she won’t answer my phone calls.” 

“Can you blame her? It sounds like you really hurt her Em,” Morgan says as his eyes are glued to me. I know I deserve it, but I can’t stand the way he looks at me like I’m one of the unsubs. My gaze drops to the floor and I bite my lip to keep the tears from coming to my eyes. 

“I know,” I say quietly. 

“For the record, I don’t think you’re an awful person. I think you’re stupid, and possibly messed up one of the only good things in your life, but I don’t think you’re an awful person.” He says. 

“Wow, that makes me feel so much better, thank you,” I say sarcastically. 

“As your friend, my job is, to be honest, not nice.” He pauses for a second before he starts talking again. “Why did you even do it?”

“I don’t know, I really don’t.” I look back up at him, “How can I fix this Morgan? They both mean so much to me.” We both stand there for a second in silence, before he breaks it. 

“Do you love her?” He asks. 

“Yes,” I reply without a second thought. 

“Who?” he asks, and it catches me off guard. 

“What?”

“When I asked, “Do you love her?” who popped up in your head? Who was the first person you thought about? JJ or (Y/N).” I pause for a moment and lean back in my chair as I think. Morgan pats me on the shoulder and starts to walk toward the door. 

“Think about it Em,” He says before he walks out and closes the door behind him.

This question stayed on my mind all night and the entire next day. We didn’t have a case so for the most part, I avoided everybody by staying in my office, but about halfway through the day, there is a knock on my door. 

“Come in,” I say absentmindedly, as I continue to bury myself in the papers in front of me. 

“Hey Em,” I hear and my head shoots up to see JJ walking into my office. 

“Are you ok?” She closes the door behind her and walks closer to me. Carelessly, she props herself on the edge of the desk and takes my hands into hers. For the first time, I realize how comfortable I have let JJ become in my life, and I feel disgusted with myself.

“JJ what are we doing?” I ask suddenly, causing her to look at me in surprise. 

“What do you mean?” She asks as she lets go of my hands. 

“You have Will and the boys. I have,” I pause as the memories of that morning come flashing back, “I had (Y/N)”

“What are you saying?” JJ asks me as she searches for my eyes. 

“I’m saying that whatever this is,” I motion between the two of us, “It needs to stop.” I expected her to be sad, or upset with me, but strangely all she does is smirk. 

“Why would it need to stop?” she asks as she leans closer to me. 

“It’s not right and you know it,” I say, trying to keep my distance from her. 

“Technically you’re not doing anything wrong,” she says as she gets off of the desk and starts walking towards me. “You and (Y/N) broke up, so you’re not cheating.” 

She sits down on my lap and wraps her arms around my neck. No matter how much my brain is screaming no, with her body so close to mine I can’t help but want to cave in. 

“JJ, that’s not the point and you know it,” I say, trying to stand my ground, but she just leans towards me and places light kisses across my jaw. 

“Come on Em,” she says as her lips move closer to mine, “Just give in.” 

And for a second I do, for a second I want to feel her lips against mine one more time, hoping that she can heal everything broken inside of me. But then I remember that there is only one person who can truly do that. I push JJ away and get up from my chair, as I walk to the other side of the room. 

“JJ I can’t,” I say as I turn back to her. 

“You can’t or you won’t?” She asks me as she crosses her arms over her chest. 

“I can’t,” I say, “I love (Y/N) more than anything else in the world. And even though she is furious at me, and we aren’t even a couple anymore, I can’t bring myself to continue doing the one thing that hurt her.” 

JJ gives a pained laugh and her head drops to the floor, and I can tell she is trying to hold back her emotions. 

“You love her more than me?” she asks, as a lone tear rolls down her cheek. 

“Yeah, I do,” I say honestly. “Jayge, I’m sorry, I really am. Maybe if the circumstances were different then we could work, but they aren’t, and it’s not worth losing the love of my life, to try and chase after this pipe dream.”

She quickly wipes away her tears and gives me a small smile before nodding her head. 

“I understand, and I’m sorry.” I stand there just staring after her as she starts to walk towards the door. But before she walks out she turns back to me. “I hope things work out with the two of you, I really do.” And then she is gone, walking back out to the bullpen, and I am standing alone in my office again. 

It feels like a giant weight has been lifted off of my shoulders, but I know there is still more for me to do. So I pack up all of the files I didn’t finish and leave work early. I know exactly where I need to go now. 

*Reader’s POV*

“How are you doing love?” Garcia asks you over the phone. Over the past two weeks, the two of you had become close. It started with you just needing to talk to somebody who understood the situation, but you have realized how much you two have in common and how much fun she is. 

“It’s still hard,” you say as you sit down on your couch, getting ready to mindlessly scroll through tv channels. 

“You need to give yourself more time,” she says, “you don’t get over a two-year relationship in two weeks.”

“Yeah I guess you’re right,” you say, settling the tv on some generic action movie. “I’m just in a weird place right now. Even with everything she did, I still have these feelings for her.”

“You need closure,” Garcia says. You sit back and think for a second. 

“I got closure,” you say, trying to convince yourself more than Garcia. 

“No sugarplum, you got revenge. The two of you never talked or resolved anything. Even if you come to a negative conclusion, that is still better closure than avoiding her.” She says and you roll your eyes in response, even though she can’t see you. 

“I’m not avoiding her, I just don’t have anything to say to her.” 

“There is always more to say.” You bite your lip as you sit there and consider what Garcia is saying, but in the middle of your thoughts, there is a knock on the door. 

“Hold on Pen, somebody is at the door,” you say as you get up and make your way over. You look through your peephole and your stomach drops to the floor. 

“She’s here,” you say panicked, into the phone. 

“I’m assuming you’re talking about Emily,” Garcia says. 

“Yes, Emily. What do I do?” you ask desperately. 

“Uh maybe let her in,” Garcia says. 

“I’m scared,” you say honestly. 

“Whatever happens you’ll be fine, remember closure. Now I am going to hang up before you waste any more time talking to me. Choi,” She says before the line goes dead. You take a deep breath, well a couple of deep breaths, before you finally gain the courage you need to open the door. 

“Emily,” you say as you open the door, “Why are you here?” 

“It was a mistake and I regret it. I don’t know what came over me and I don't know why I did it, but I do know that I love you with my entire heart, and being without you hurts and I will never betray your trust again.” She spews out. 

“What?” You ask as you try and wrap your head around what she just said. 

“That’s what you wanted me to say. I didn’t say it then, but I am saying it now.” You stand there for a second, stunned before you finally come to your senses. 

“Why don’t you come in the house,” you say to her, and with a thankful smile, she makes her way through the door. 

She walks into the living room, and you remember the last time she had stood in this room. With those memories come the pain that you felt, and you start to regret inviting her in. 

She stops suddenly in the middle of the floor and turns around to face you. 

“I broke things off with JJ,” she says. 

“We aren’t dating anymore Emily, you can do whatever you want with JJ,” you say, the anger building back up in your body. 

“No, I don’t want to do anything with JJ anymore,” she says. “Can we...can we please just sit and talk.” She asks desperately. You sigh, and motion towards the couch for her to sit down. Once the two of you are seated, Emily takes a deep breath before she starts talking again. 

“Morgan made me realize something yesterday. Talking to him made me realize that it was so stupid...” you accidentally interrupt her as you instinctively let out a scoff. 

“It took a conversation with Derek for you to realize your mistake,” you say with a roll of your eyes, “So the only reason you’re even over here is because somebody else had to tell you what you did was wrong.”

“Will you please just listen to me,” she says exasperated. You think back on what you had talked about on the phone with Garcia, and you calm yourself down a little. 

“Fine, talk, and I’ll listen.” She gives you a relieved look, before continuing. 

“What I did was so stupid, and I regret it. Being away from you these past two weeks has put things into perspective for me. You are truly the only person that I love, despite, anything I might have done with JJ, and I hope I can get another chance to show you that.” 

At the end of her speech, she looks back up at you, and the two of you just sit there looking at each other for a moment before you clear your throat. 

“I want to believe you. And I want to forgive you, but I’m not sure if I can. Not only did you break my heart but you also broke my trust. Why should I believe you now, when you were so comfortable lying to me before?” 

Emily shakes her head a bit and bites her lip nervously before she answers. 

“You’re right. I messed up, and hurt you in ways I can’t even begin to imagine. If you want to kick me out right now, then I will leave and never come back. But I need you to know that I am willing to do anything to make this better. To make us better.”

“I appreciate that,” you say, “but you can’t put a bandaid on a broken bone and expect it to heal. I need to heal and that takes time. Maybe in the future, we can try again, but it just hurts too much right now.”

“I understand,” she says with a nod, “I can give you time, space, anything you need. And if you ever find it in your heart to forgive me, I’ll be here.” Your emotions are all over the place and a few tears start to run down your face. 

“Thank you, Emily,” you say. She sees your tears, and gently reaches over to wipe a few away with her thumb. 

“I love you,” she says quietly, just barely above a whisper, but you hear her. 

You reach out and slowly grab her hand that was on your face. You give it a reassuring squeeze, and shoot Emily a small smile. She looks into your eyes, and you can see tears in hers as well. Gently you pull her closer to you and the two of you wrap your arms around each other. With a sigh, you relax into her familiar embrace, and just cherish this one moment in time, where everything felt ok again.


	35. Lunch

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning - Sexual Content/Smut

With a smug smile on your face, you make your way into the BAU. It used to be an issue, you showing up at Quantico so much, but now you visit so often that you might as well work there. 

Emily had told you multiple times, not to visit her at work. She didn’t want you to see the things that she did. But you know that no matter what she said, she secretly liked it when you would randomly show up. 

You wave to JJ and Reid as you pass through the bullpen and head up to Emily’s office. You knock twice before you hear her say, 

“Come in.”

Opening the door, you smile at your wife as she looks up from the papers in front of her. When she sees that it is you, her shoulders relax and a wide smile spreads on her face. 

“Hey, (Y/N),” she says happily as she gets up from behind her desk. She walks over and places a light kiss on your lips. Simultaneously she notices the bag you are holding in your hand. 

“You brought lunch?” she asks as her eyes brighten. You nod in response and sit the bag down on the desk. 

“I brought your favorite,” you say as you pull the containers out of the bag. 

“I love you,” she says as she wraps her arms around you and kisses you again. You laugh lightly against her lips. 

Just then, the door opens and Penelope peeks her head inside. 

“Oh, am I interrupting something?” she asks, startled to see you. 

“No, you’re good Garcia. We were just about to have lunch,” Emily says, her arms still around you. “What did you need?”

“Oh nothing that can’t wait,” she says with a wave of her hand. “I will tell everyone that you are busy so you two can enjoy your lunch in peace.” 

“Thank you, Penelope,” you say with a smile. 

“Anything for you two lovebirds,” she says with a wink, before leaving and closing the door behind her. 

Turning back to Emily, you give her another quick kiss, before the two of you sit down and start eating. 

“So how has work been?” you start the conversation, but Emily visibly tenses and clenches her jaw. 

“That bad, huh?” you ask, the food in front of you momentarily forgotten. 

“Can we please not talk about it?” Emily asks, clearly agitated. 

“Yeah, of course,” you say as you get out of your chair and walk over behind her. 

“What are you doing?” she asks as you start to massage her shoulders. 

“Well,” you say as you bend down and place light kisses on her neck, “talking about work made you stressed. So I figured I could help you relax.”

“I thought you were just here to bring me lunch,” she says as she leans her head back, giving you better access to her neck. But instead of continuing your kisses, you move around the chair and sit in her lap. 

“I was,” you say as you wrap your arms around her neck, “but now there has been a change of plans.”

You press your body against Emily’s as you capture her lips in a steamy kiss. Her hands drift under your shirt as she moves to deepen the kiss until suddenly she pulls away. 

“I can’t (Y/N), I am at work,” she protests. But her hands are still resting comfortably on your skin, so you know she doesn’t mean it. 

“Garcia told the team you were busy, remember?” you ask as you seductively slide off of her lap, onto the floor in front of her. “If we are quick, then nobody will suspect anything.”

“The hesitation quickly fades as you start to undo her belt. 

“Lift up for me,” you say once you get her belt and pants undone. She does as you say and you quickly pull down her pants and underwear. 

You throw Emily a quick smirk before you bury your tongue into her folds. She lets out a moan before covering her mouth with her hand to keep herself quiet. 

You chuckle lightly as you wrap your lips around her swollen clit. 

“(Y/N), please,” Emily says. You look up at her to see her chest moving up and down and her head thrown back in pleasure. 

You pull your lips away for a second as you run your fingers up and down her thighs. 

“Please, what?” you ask your light touch moving closer to her core. 

“I need you,” she says as she locks eyes with you, “please.”

You smile at her before pushing two fingers into her entrance and curving them up in search of her G spot. 

“Right there,” Emily cries out. You pull your fingers out of her heat and instead put them in her mouth. 

“Shh,” you say quietly, as Emily sucks her own juices off of your fingers, “remember where we are and be a good girl, ok?” She nods in return and your hands get back to work. 

Emily makes a small squeaking sound as you reenter her, but she quickly gets herself under control. 

As you work your fingers inside of her, she grinds herself against your hand, trying to create more friction. You move your fingers faster and it’s not much longer before she starts coming undone under your touch. 

Emily bites her hand to keep herself from screaming out your name as she rides out her orgasm. Once she is done, you use your tongue to lick her clean, before you help her pull her pants back up around her hips. 

As you start to stand up, she grabs the back of your head and pulls you down for a long kiss. 

You pull away with a smile and turn to head to the door, but she grabs your writs to stop you. 

“Where do you think you are going?” she asks. 

“We have been in here for god knows how long Em,” you say as you turn back to her. “I should leave now before they start to get suspicious.” Emily just shakes her head and pulls you closer to her. 

“If you walk out now,” she says as she wraps her arms around your waist, “I won’t return the favor when we are at home.” 

“Oh that is cold,” you say as you hold your hand over your heart, causing her to laugh. 

“And besides,” she says, “We never finished our lunch.”


	36. Questions...

You thank the barista for your coffee as you move to find somewhere to sit in the small cafe. As you look around though, you notice that almost every seat is full. Your eyes land on one empty table by the window, and you head over to it. Right as you grab for the chair, another hand meets yours. You look up at the body attached to it and are taken aback. 

Your gaze meets a beautiful face with even more beautiful brown eyes. You panic and freeze, just standing there. 

“I’m sorry,” she says, breaking you out of your trance. 

“No, I’m sorry,” you respond. “You can sit here if you want,” you let go of the chair and start to walk away but she calls out to you. 

“Wait,” she says, and you turn back around to see her smiling face. “We can both sit here,” she suggests. 

“Thank you,” you say as you walk back over and sit down across from her. “My name is (Y/N),” you say as you reach across the table. 

“I’m Emily,” she says as she shakes your hand. 

“It’s nice to meet you,” you say with a smile.

The two of you get settled, you pulling out your laptop you had planned to work on, and her pulling out a book. You sit in silence for a moment, both of you doing your own thing, but your attention keeps getting drawn to her. You notice that she keeps fidgeting and biting her nails. 

“Are you ok?” you ask, and she looks up at you in surprise. “I’m sorry we just met. I shouldn’t have asked,” you say clumsily, worried that you messed up, but she just gives you a gentle smile. 

“It’s ok,” she says as she closes her book, and focuses her attention on you. “I’m supposed to be starting this new job, but my boss doesn’t seem to like me very much.”

“Why do you think that?” you ask, as you take a sip of your coffee. 

“Well,” she says with a sigh, “I walked into his office this morning, ready to work, only to find out that he didn’t even approve of my transfer. So I wasn’t even supposed to be there.” 

“Ouch,” you say, “so do you have the job now?”

“I don’t know,” she says with a shrug, “I’ll know whenever he gets back in town sometime later in the week.”

“Well I wish you the best of luck,” you say. 

“Thank you," she says before a smirk comes onto her face. "The good part about all of this is that I don't have to work until he gets back.” She pauses as she looks over at you. “What about you? You busy the rest of the week?”

“Why do you ask?” you respond as you lean closer to her, your interest peaked. 

“I would love to get to know you better, possibly on a date,” she suggests. 

“Wow, that’s a little bold don’t you think,” you say playfully. 

“I like to go after what I want,” she says softly. 

You can't decide if you should agree to the date or not. You've had your fair share of bad experiences when it comes to dating, so you are a little wary, but she is insanely hot, and you can't help being attracted to her. You decide to leave your options open either way. 

“Well, I’m pretty busy, I’ll have to see if I can work something into my schedule,” you say. With a playful smile, she grabs a pen and writes her number on the napkin in front of her, which she then slides over to you. 

“Well, if your schedule clears up, give me a call.” She winks at you, before getting up and walking out of the cafe. 

It took a lot of self-convincing, but you finally give in and give her a call the next day. You had planned on scheduling something for later in the week, but she said her boss was still gone, so the two of you ended up meeting for lunch. And then the next day came, and you met for dinner. And then the next day it was a movie, and the next it was breakfast at your house. Things might have been moving a little fast but it honestly felt like the two of you had known each other forever. 

It had been three weeks of the two of you hanging out when one day you get a knock on your door. As you open it, Emily rushes in laughing. She picks you up and spins you around in a circle, causing you to join in her laughter. 

“You are in a happy mood today,” you say as she puts you down. 

“It is finally official, all of the paperwork and everything is done and I have my job permanently!” she says excitedly. You throw your arms around her in a tight hug. 

“I knew you could do it,” you say as the two of you start to pull apart. Her eyes wander over your face, and they land on your lips.

She still hadn’t kissed you yet, even though you could tell she wanted to, because she didn't want to move too fast and scare you away. You decide to take some initiative, and you press your lips against hers. 

The kiss is soft and slow. Her hand slips into your hair as you wrap your arms around her waist. Her tongue grazes your bottom lip, asking for access, and you gladly give it to her. 

As the kiss ends, and the two of you break apart, you rest your forehead against hers. You can’t help but let out a soft giggle as the bubble of joy rises in your chest. 

“So what are we going to do to celebrate?” you ask in a half-whisper. 

“One of my coworkers is planning a night out to congratulate me, you should come.” 

“I’ll be there,” you say with a smile before kissing her again. 

The next day, Emily picks you up and the two of you head out. When you get to the bar, you start to head inside, but Emily stops right at the door. 

“Shit, I left my wallet in the car,” she says. 

“Em, it’s fine, I can pay,” you say, but she just shakes her head. 

“I invited you, remember? I’m paying. Go ahead inside, I’ll be right back” She gives you a light kiss on the cheek, before turning around and heading back to the car. 

You turn around and enter the bar, but are surprised when you see a couple of familiar faces at a table nearby. 

“What’s up strangers,” you say as you walk over to them. They look over at you and break into smiles. 

“Well hello sweet stuff,” Derek says as he gets up and hugs you. 

“Hey, hot chocolate,” you say, but then you feel a slap on your arm. 

“Hey,” Penelope says, “hands off my man.” 

“Don’t worry baby girl, nobody is stealing me away from you,” Derek says as he lets go of you and kisses Pen on the top of her head. You chuckle a bit before turning your attention to the other people at the table. 

“Hey JJ,” you reach across the table to shake her hand. “And Spencer,” you say with a wave, remembering his aversion to germs. 

“It’s nice to see you again, (Y/N),” Spencer says with a smile. 

“I don’t suppose Aaron is here, is he?” you ask. 

“What, you don’t think I can have a little fun?” you hear a deep voice behind you. Turning around, you quickly throw your arms around the man, and he wraps his around you as well. 

“It’s been too long,” he says as you slip out of his arms. 

“Who are you telling?” You ask, “you’re the one who is out of town so much,” you say as you punch him lightly on the arm. He shoots you a large smile, one that he only saves specifically for you, as he sits down at the table. 

“So why are all of you here?” You ask as you address the group as a whole. 

“Little miss sunshine planned this get-together to welcome a new member of our team,” Derek says as he nudges Garcia. The gears in your head start turning, but it’s only a coincidence, right? 

“You guys have a new team member?” you ask curiously. “What’s their name?”

“Emily Prentiss, daughter of Ambassador Elizabeth Prentiss,” Garcia starts to prattle off. “Travelled around the world as a child because of her mother’s diplomatic background, graduated a year early from Yale, fluent in at least five languages…”

“And is smart enough to beat Reid at cards,” Derek says with a smirk before taking a sip of the drink in front of him. You play it cool and laugh, but inside you are going through all five stages of grief. 

“Now, why are you here?” Aaron asks, his protective side peeking through. 

“Oh,” you say, making up a story on the spot, “I was supposed to meet a date here but they stood me up.” Growing up around a profiler had done wonders in teaching you how to lie and not get caught. 

“Why don’t you sit down and join us,” JJ suggests, “Emily should be here any minute, we could introduce you to her.” You just shake your head. 

“I actually should be headed back home, but it was nice seeing you all.” You lean down and give Aaron another hug before your wave to the rest of the team. 

You rush out of the door and meet Emily as she is about to walk into the bar. She sees your worried expression and furrows her eyebrows in concern. 

“Hey, what’s wrong?” she asks as she touches your arm gently. 

“I’ll explain later, but when you walk in there you don’t know me, and you’ve never met me ok?” you say, in a hurried manner. 

“Wait you’re not staying? What happened?” She asks you, even more concerned and worried than before. You close your eyes and take a deep breath to try and slow your heart rate. You open your eyes again and smile. 

“I’ll explain later,” you say slower and calmer than before. 

“At least let me drive you home,” she says. You grab both of her hands and take a step closer to her. 

“I. am. fine.” you say, enunciating each word, “I’ll get an Uber or something, you just stay here and enjoy your night.” 

“I’m worried about you,” she says softly. You lean closer to her and place a soft kiss on her lips. 

“Don’t be,” you say in a half-whisper, “call me when you get home and I’ll come over, ok?” She nods her head and begrudgingly turns around and walks into the bar, but not before glancing back at you a few more times. You let out a sigh of relief before you take out your phone and find a way home. 

*Emily’s POV*

I didn’t want to leave her. When she came out, she seemed worried and even a little scared. But she told me that everything was fine, and even though I have all of these feelings for her, we aren’t even serious yet. 

My brain is a jumbled mess as I walk into the bar, and I don't even notice the team sitting down until Derek calls out to me. I plaster on a smile and walk over to them. 

“We were just talking about you,” JJ says as you sit down in the seat next to Hotch. 

“You were?” I ask. 

“Yeah,” Garcia says, “We wanted (Y/N) to meet you but she said she had somewhere to be.” My heart jumps in my chest at the sound of her name, but then I remember what she said to me. 

“Who is (Y/N)?” I ask, hopefully doing an adequate job at hiding my real emotions. 

“My little sister,” Hotch says. My head whips over to him and it takes every part of me to not let my jaw drop open as a single thought goes through my head. 

There is no way this is happening.


	37. ...and Answers

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is part two to the last one xoxo

*Emily's POV*

“I didn’t know you had a sister,” I say once I regain my composure.

“Yeah, Hotch isn’t very open with his personal life,” JJ says with a laugh.

“I’m open with my personal life,” hotch says defensively.

“Yeah, and Reid can beat me at a pick-up game,” Morgan jokes, and Reid shoots him a glare.

The whole team laughs, even Hotch lets out a chuckle. But my mind is still stuck on the fact that I am dating my boss' little sister.

The night goes on, and after a few drinks, I manage to loosen up. The team and I had fun, up until Garcia had one too many, and JJ and I ended up having to hold her hair back. We decided to call it a night then, and with a wave to all of them, I get in my car and head home.

(Y/N), had agreed to come over, and not long after I walk through my front door, I get a text from her saying that she is outside. As I open the door, she gives me a shy smile before walking into the apartment and getting comfortable on my couch. I sit next to her, and she leans into my side. 

“How was your night?” she asks, nonchalantly.

“Before or after I found out I was defiling my Unit Chief's baby sister?” I ask as I look at her.

“Hey,” she says as she looks up at me, “we had our first kiss yesterday. You haven’t even come close to defiling me yet.” The smirk on her face sets my gut on fire.

“I can if you want me to,” I say with a growl as I lean down and capture her lips in mine. She starts to lean back on the couch, bringing me with her, but I just can’t. Reluctantly I pull away and sit back up.

“You’re still thinking about Aaron aren’t you,” she asks me, and I just sigh.

“I’m sorry,” I say softly, as I look over at her. “I just can’t believe I didn’t realize.”

“Yeah,” she says, “the last names really should have tipped you off.”

“It passed my mind,” I say with a shrug, “but you guys look nothing alike.”

“Your profiling skills didn’t come in handy?” she asks me teasingly, as she pokes my ribs. Even in this short time that we’ve been together, she has been able to make me feel better when I am upset.

“No, they didn’t.” I tickle her back and the room fills with her sweet laughter. I let up on my assault, and pull her legs into my lap, taking her hands in mine.

“What’s going to happen to us?” I ask gently.

“Nothing,” she says, reassuring me with her kind smile. “We just won’t tell Aaron yet.”

“You want me to lie to my boss?”

“No,” she says as she stands up and pulls me up with her. “I want you to lie to my brother.” She laughs a little, finding more humor in the situation than I do. “Now come on, let's go to bed, I am tired.”

With a peck on my lips, she drags me behind her to the bedroom. We undress and lay down to sleep, and only sleep. I don’t need to do anything more. Just having her close to me was enough. 

As I feel her warmth, and breath in her sweet shampoo, I drift off to a peaceful sleep.

*Reader’s POV*

Out of fear, you and Emily both agreed that you would wait until things got more serious between the two of you before telling Aaron. Well, things got serious quickly, and before long the two of you were moving in together. It has been months now, and the two of you were still a secret.

One night, Aaron invited you and Sean over to his house for a family dinner to catch up. As you walk into the house, Sean leaps out at you and ruffles your hair.

“What’s up little bit?” he asks as he laughs at your upturned face.

“Can you stop calling me that?” you ask as you fix your hair. “I am an adult.”

“Yea, but you are always going to be little but,” he says as he starts to walk into the kitchen.

“Hey Sean,” you call out to him. He stops and turns to you with a smile.

“Yes?”

“I could use some big brother wisdom.” He looks around the room before pointing to himself.

“You want wisdom from me? Not Supervisory Special Agent Aaron Hotchner?” he says mockingly, causing you to laugh.

“Yes, jerk, from you.” He smirks and walks over to you, throwing his arm over your shoulder.

“Well, how can I help you kid?” You take a deep breath and gain the courage that you need.

“I’m dating this girl, Emily. She works on Aaron's team, but he doesn't know about us yet. What should I do?” Sean stands there for a moment, just staring at you before he bursts out in laughter.

“Hey I’m serious,” you say as you push him away from you. “How mad do you think that he will be?”

He stops laughing and turns to face you, with the most serious look you’ve seen him have in a while.

“You gonna tell him tonight?” you nod in response. “Well then just do one thing for me,” he pauses as you wait expectantly. “Wait until after I leave.” He pats your shoulder and walks about laughing again. You roll your eyes and follow after him.

Dinner starts well, it feels nice to be able to catch up with your brothers. Despite the butterflies and nervousness in your stomach, you manage to enjoy yourself.

You had almost made it all of the way through dinner with no incident until your phone starts ringing. You glance at it and your heart jumps to your throat.

“Who is that?” Aaron asks as he looks over at you.

“Nobody,” you say quickly, too quickly. He can sense your nervousness and raises an eyebrow at you.

The two of you both reach for your phone at the same time, but your reflexes are a hair too slow. He manages to grab your phone and looks at the caller id.

“Why is Emily calling you?” he asks, his voice dangerously low.

“I don’t know,” you say with a shrug.

“Well, this was nice,” Sean says as he starts to stand up. “I will just be going now.”

“Sit down,” Aaron bellows as he turns his attention to Sean. As he sits back down, Aaron places his forearms on the table in front of him.

“You are lying to me,” he says to you. “And you know something,” he says, turning his attention over to Sean. “Now tell me what it is!”

The three of you sit there for a moment in silence, until you finally decide to just come out with it.

“Me and Emily are dating.” He looks at you with his eyes narrowed.

“How long?” he asks through clenched teeth.

“Eight months,” you say quietly.

“Eight Months!?” he yells as he slams his fist on the table as he gets up and turns away from you.

“It was before she even knew that she had the job.” you as, your voice raising as well. He turns to you, shooting daggers with his glare.

“At no point in the last eight months did you think that was something that I needed to know?”

“No, I didn’t because my personal life is none of your business,” at this point, both of you have stood up from the table and were yelling at each other.

“It is my damn business,” he says.

“Hey, wait a minute,” Sean says, as he also stands up. “(Y/N) is an adult, she can make her own decisions.”

“Stay out of this!” Aaron says, but Sean just lets out a short laugh.

“I tried to but somebody made me keep my ass here, so you are going to hear what I have to say.” Sean gives you a reassuring look and you shoot him a thankful smile. “If (Y/N) and Emily are happy then what else does it matter? Clearly, if they have been able to keep it from you this long then it has done no harm. So what is the big issue?”

“I still needed to know,” Aaron says, his voice much quieter than earlier, but still holding that same anger.

“Tell me something?” you ask as you turn your attention back to Aaron. “Are you mad that I am dating Emily? Mad that I didn’t tell you? Or are you mad because you think I don't need you anymore?”

Aaron pauses, speechless. You can tell that you were right because you can see his eyes start to soften. He doesn't let it linger for long, because if there is one thing that he is good at, it's hiding his emotions.

“Look,” you say gently as you take a step towards him. “I know throughout our entire life, you were more of a father to me than dad ever was, but I am my own person with my own life, and you have to accept the decisions that I make.”

“I just want to protect you,” he says softly.

“From Emily?” you ask in confusion.

“No, not from Emily. From the world that Me, Emily, and my whole team see every day.”

“I can handle it,” you say.

“I know you can,” he says as he drops his gaze to the floor. “It’s just hard for me to accept.”

You walk over to him and pull him into a hug. He wraps his arms around you and rests his chin on the top of your head, as your face is buried in his chest. You take in this moment for a second until Sean comes over and throws himself into the hug, making you laugh, and Aaron rolls his eyes.

“Did you drive here?” Aaron asks once the hug breaks up.

“No, I got an Uber,” you respond.

“Let me drive you home,” he says sincerely, and even though he will probably never say the words, you know this is his way of saying sorry.

“What about me?” Sean asks as he throws his hands up in the air.

“You can drive yourself home,” Hotch says dismissively.

“I always knew she was your favorite,” Sean says, feigning offense.

“You got that right, and don’t forget it,” you say as you nudge Sean in the arm.

As you and Aaron climb in the car, there is still tension, but for the most part, the two of you have made amends. He starts to head in the direction of your old apartment but you clear your throat getting his attention.

“Actually, can you drop me off at Emily’s house?” You ask, cautiously. He makes some sort of indescribably noise and glances over at you.

“You really like her?” he asks.

“I love her,” you say, honestly.

“Have you told her?” This takes you by surprise.

“She knows I love her, we live together,” you say. He gives you a stern look before focusing on the road.

“You should tell her, say the words.” You shake your head.

“Those words are dangerous.”

“No, they aren’t.”

“Yes, they are. When you love somebody, and you tell them, it hurts even more when they leave. You know that.” Just then he pulls into the apartment parking lot and turns his body to look at you.

“You can’t afford to not tell her, and then lose her before you get the chance. When I started working at the BAU, Gideon used to say, "in our field of work, it is not a guarantee that we come home every day. So every day that we do is special." If she has chosen you to be the person that gets to be there when she gets home, then that means a lot. Tell her how you feel while you have the chance.” You sit in silence for a second as his words wash over you. Looking over at him you smile and let out a small chuckle.

“Look at that,” you say quietly as he looks over at you confused. “I do still need you after all.”

He smiles, not a typical Aaron smile, a smile that says a thousand words. It says, I love you and I’m proud of you and I trust you.

You get out of the car and start to walk to Emily’s apartment but notice that you are being followed.

“What?” Aaron says with a shrug, “If I am going to be the father figure then I have to meet the boyfriend or girlfriend in this case.” You just shake your head at him as you walk up to Emily's door.

After you knock, she opens the door with a smile that suddenly turns cold.

“Hotch, hey,” she says nervously.

“It’s ok Em,” you say as you step through the door and kiss her on the cheek, “he knows.”

“Sir, I’m sorry for…” she starts to apologize but Aaron holds his hands up to stop her.

“You don’t need to apologize Emily. It’s ok, I approve of your relationship.” Emily breaks into a smile and reaches out to shake his hand.

“Thank you, sir,” she says.

“Just remember, I write the evaluations that say whether or not you are fit for your job, so don’t mess up.” Emily gets a scared look on her face but you just roll your eyes.

“Bye Aaron,” you say as you push him out of the door, and close it behind you.

Turning to Emily, you pull her into a hug. She holds you tight as you rest your head on her shoulder.

“I love you,” you whisper into her ear. She pulls back from the hug and looks you in the eye, disbelief written on her face. You start to fear that she won’t say it back, or that she doesn’t love you too, but then she presses you against the wall and attacks your lips with hers.

“I love you too,” she says, breathlessly, as she breaks the kiss for just a second before continuing. 

Your hands roam over each other’s skin as you try to get as close to each other as possible. Eventually, the two of you find your way to the bedroom and spend all night with each other, connected in more ways than one.

As you wake up the next morning, tangled in her arms, you realize that things couldn’t have ended more perfectly. You got the girl of your dreams and you maintained a good relationship with your brother and her boss. Life couldn’t get any better than this.


	38. Lauren - 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning - Spoilers for seasons 6 and 7

Lauren Reynolds is dead. 

Car Accident. 

What a strangely mundane way for somebody like her to go. 

Her death shouldn’t have affected you the way that it did, but you couldn’t help yourself. 

None of this was even supposed to happen. She wasn’t supposed to be there, you weren’t supposed to be around her, and you definitely were not supposed to fall in love with her. 

*8 years earlier* 

“Open it,” Ian says to Liam, one of his partners. 

A new shipment had come in, and now you were all outside waiting to see it. Liam pulls back the curtain on the truck and reveals supplies ten times as good as what you usually get. You and Liam share a look of apprehension, that Ian notices. 

“Is something wrong?” he asks as he looks between the two of you. 

“None of our other suppliers can get stuff this good,” Liam says to Ian, before shooting a glare towards the woman behind him. “She’s too good to be true, and you’re too blind to see it.” 

You notice that Ian gets mad at the assumption, and he tightens his jaw. Turning to the woman, he tells her to go to the car, and with a nod, she does as she is told. 

“I’ll take care of her,” Ian says to Liam, which seems to appease him, but you know better. As Liam and Ian both start to walk away you call Ian back. 

“He’s right you know,” you say as he turns back around to you.

“I said, I would take care of her,” Ian says but you shake your head. 

“I know that was just something you said to get Liam off of your back.” Ian doesn’t respond and instead turns around and starts walking back to the car. “If you’re wrong about her, we are all in big trouble, you know that right.” You call after him. But again he just keeps walking, ignoring you. 

The next day you run into this mysterious woman Ian brought in. And by run into, you literally mean run into. As you are walking through the hall, she rounds the corner and bumps into you, causing you to fall to the floor. 

“I’m so sorry,” she says as she reaches out to help you up. But you push yourself up on your own, ignoring her outstretched hand. 

“Are you ok?” She asks as you brush yourself off. For the first time since she has gotten here, you get a good look at her. 

She has shoulder-length hair, curled perfectly. Her skin is flawless, and she has the kindest brown eyes. You start to wonder how somebody as beautiful as her ever got into this kind of work. You feel your mask slipping as she draws you in, but you quickly regain your composure.

“Look,” you say as you cross your arms over your chest. “Ian might trust you, but I don’t.”

“I’m Lauren,” she says with a smile, completely unfazed. She reaches her hand out to you again, this time to offer you a handshake. You grab her hand, but instead of shaking it, you pull her closer to you, to where your face is only inches away from hers. 

“I’m watching you, Lauren,” you whisper, your tone deadly. You drop your hand and walk off, leaving her staring after you. 

Despite your attempts to watch her from a distance, and avoid contact, that was a pretty hard thing to do when you lived in the same house. Oftentimes you would find her in the garden, or kitchen, or living room running around with Declan. And every time you did run into her, your suspicions grew less and less. If she were going to do something she would have by now, right?

One day, you are standing in the doorway to the living room, as you watch her run around with Declan. He has never taken to anybody as quickly as he took to Lauren. He loves her and she cares for him too. 

That’s good, you think to yourself, the boy needs somebody that cares for him. 

“Declan!” Louise, Declan’s nanny, calls him. He says bye to Lauren, and runs over to Louise. 

As Declan runs away you step further into the room, and you catch Lauren’s attention. 

“Hello,” she says. 

“Hi,” you respond as you look her up and down. “Declan seems to like you.” She smiles sheepishly and tucks a strand of hair behind her ear. 

“I like him too,” she says. 

“It’s a good thing,” you say to her, “he needs somebody like you.” She looks at you for a moment before moving over and sitting down on the couch. 

“What about you? He talks about you sometimes.” You laugh curtly and shake your head.

“I’m no good for him,” you say. “He needs someone kind, someone who can teach him how to be a good person.”

“Why do you think I am that person?” She asks you. 

“Well,” you say as you take a step closer to her. “I’ve been watching you.” She brushes her hands against her pants nervously as she looks up at you.

“Watching me?” She asks.

“This world,” you say as you gesture around to the house, “you hate it. I can tell. When you’re with Ian, you do a damn good job hiding it, but when you’re alone, I can see your disdain for this house and this job. Meaning you’re either not who you say you are, or you don’t belong in this business.” 

The two of you stare at each other, sizing each other up. But instead of giving in like you thought she would, she just smiles at you.

“Well,” she says as she stands up from the couch, “If I am lying, I’m sure you’ll be the one to figure it out, won’t you. See you later, (Y/N).” 

This time she is the one to walk out, leaving you staring after her. 

There is something about that woman, you think as you too walk out of the living room. 

\- - - - - - - - - - - -

You are busy for the next couple of days. Ian has been stressed out lately and has been taking it out on you. He’s given you a lot more work than you usually would do, meaning you hadn’t had a chance to keep an eye out for Lauren.

To get away from all of your responsibilities, you’ve started taking walks outside. As you are walking around the yard one day, you notice Lauren sitting in the garden, in a white button-up. 

“Do you always Garden in white?” You call out to her. She looks up at you and smiles. 

“Afraid of a little dirt?” She questions with a light laugh that makes your heart do a strange flutter. 

“No, but I figured you would be,” you say, with a smirk.

“Well, I’m not,” She says, before scooting over, making space beside her. You understand what she is trying to say, and cautiously start to walk over towards her. When you crouch down next to her, she hands you a flower bud. As she does, your hands brush against each other, and she looks you in the eye. Despite your best efforts, a blush comes onto your face, but you quickly hide it. 

Ducking your head back to look at the dirt, you set your hands to work, planting the flowers. The two of you work together in silence for a while, until Lauren stops working and looks over at you. 

“So how did you meet Ian?” She asks suddenly. Your head snaps up, and you look at her in shock. 

“Why is that any of your business?” You ask defensively. 

“It’s not,” she says with a shrug, “I’m just making small talk.”

“Small talk is when you ask about the weather, or about how my day has been. Not about my past.” 

“Ok, sorry,” she says as she puts down her tools, and turns her body to look at you directly. “How has your day been?”

“Are you serious?” you ask as your furrow your eyebrows, worried this is some sort of trick. 

“Yes I am serious,” she says with a nod. “How was your day?”

“Well,” you say as you also put your tools down, and turn your attention to her, “Ian had me...” 

“No, don’t talk about this job,” she says as she interrupts you. “Tell me about how your day has been, outside of work.”

“This job is all that I do,” you say. She pauses for a second and tilts her head a bit as if trying to make sense of what you said. 

“You’ve never wanted to do more?” she questions. 

This makes you stop and think. This job has been all that you knew, ever since you and Ian met, he has always drawn you into his activities. But it’s not like you could leave. He was the only person that you still had. 

“Even if I did, would it matter?” you say quietly. 

Lauren looks at you, and you see pity in her eyes. Pity that you don’t need. Pity that you don’t deserve. 

“(Y/N),” you hear someone call, breaking the tension that was quickly building. You turn around to see one of Ian’s buddies standing a few feet away. “Ian is looking for you,” he says before turning back around and heading inside. 

You get up and start to walk away until a hand grabs your wrist. As you turn around, Lauren gets up and throws her arms around you. You freeze for a second, trying to figure out where this even came from until you relax into her embrace and hug her back. 

“Bye (Y/N),” she says as the two of you pull away. 

“Bye Lauren.”

\- - - - - - - - - - - - 

Once again, Ian has you working like a dog, and it is another couple of days before you even get the chance to take a break. When you do, you close yourself in your room and lay on your bed. Ian had left, leaving you completely alone for the next couple of days. Well, you weren’t completely alone. 

Just as you are getting comfortable, there is a knock on the door. With a groan, you get up and walk over to open it. 

“Hey,” you say, slightly surprised to see Lauren at your door. 

“Uhh, do you know where Ian went?” she asks you nervously. 

“He left,” you say. 

“He just left?” She asks, confused. 

“He didn’t tell you?” you ask, and she shakes her head. “Yeah, he claims that the shipments won’t get where they need to unless he’s overseeing them,” You tell her. 

“He is very controlling isn’t he?” she asks. 

“I don’t think I should say anything,” you say. Despite what you previously thought about her, you don’t want to say anything to potentially ruin her relationship. 

“It’s ok, you can tell me the truth,” she says as she looks you in the eye. 

“He’s just usually very careful…” you start to say, but you catch yourself.

“Except when it comes to me,” she says, finishing your sentence for you. “It’s ok I know you were thinking about it.” She looks at you, with a sad and hopeless expression that tugs at your heartstrings. “How can I get you to trust me?” she asks you. 

“I-” you start to say but you are at a loss for words. She sighs and starts to walk away, but you call out to her. 

“Wait, don’t leave,” she stops and turns around to you. 

You reach over to her and grab her arm, gently pulling her into your room. You close the door behind you, and the two of you sit down on your bed. She looks over at you expectantly, and you take a deep breath. 

“My parents died when I was younger and I was living on the streets,” you say as you start to tell your story, hoping that opening up about your past would show her that you do trust her. “I started getting into illegal activities to survive, and I met Ian. He saved me, let me join him. And I wasn't living on the streets anymore.”

“Were you two a thing?” she asks quietly, and you let out a short laugh. 

“No, no never, you have nothing to worry about. We are close but never a couple. Let’s just say I swing the other way,” a look of relief comes onto her face, but not for the reason that you assumed. 

“Oh,” she says gently. She reaches over and takes your hand into hers. “I’m sorry, about how rough your life was.”

“Don’t be, it taught me some valuable lessons,” you say as you look over at her. 

She is looking into your eyes, and her gaze is intense. She reaches up and gently places her hand on your cheek. You are taken back for a second but soon lean into the warmth of her palm.

It feels like a magnet is drawing you in. Slowly, the two of you get closer together, until you can feel her warm breath against your face. Your eyes flutter shut as your lips finally connect. You sigh into the kiss, and she pulls you closer to her until you remember that this is not supposed to be happening. 

“Wait,” you say as you pull away from her, “What about Ian?”

“He’s gone,” is all she says as she attacks your neck with her lips. 

“Lauren…” you breathe out her name. 

“Just let it happen,” she says before kissing your lips again. She leans into the kiss, pushing you onto your back until she is propped on top of you. As she sits on your hips, she quickly discards her shirt, and instinctively you reach out to touch her skin. 

It feels smooth and warm under your fingertips, and you can’t get enough. Pulling her back down to you, you kiss her desperately, as the two of you abandon all of your unnecessary clothes. The feeling that you get from her is so intoxicating, like nothing you have ever felt before, and you can’t help but relish in her touch all night. 

Eventually, after a couple of hours, the two of you are exhausted. With Lauren tucked under your arm, you relax back onto your bed. 

This isn’t right and this wasn’t supposed to happen, you try and convince yourself. But then why does being with her feel so good, another part of your brain chips in. 

You glance over at her sleeping figure next to you, and you can’t help the goofy smile that makes its way onto your face. Deciding that you are far too tired to give either half of your brain any real attention tonight, you just pull Lauren closer to you and close your eyes, as you too drift off to sleep. 

That night was the beginning of something special. Over the next few weeks, the two of you developed a bond that was matched by nothing else. It felt like she was your exact opposite, somebody loving and soft that brought out better parts of you. When you were near her, she managed to chip away the hardened exterior that you had built up over the years. 

But it wasn’t easy. She was still technically with Ian and knowing him, he wouldn’t take too lightly to you finding a place in his girlfriend's bed. But whenever he was gone, it was perfect. 

One day as you are walking through the halls, you hear somebody talking. Moving closer to the kitchen door, you listen closely and recognize Lauren’s voice. 

“He proposed,” she says into the phone. 

Is she talking about Ian? You think to yourself.

“It’s getting too serious, I need to leave,” she continues. 

Your gut drops to your feet. You were right, this whole time you were right. She has been lying and she isn’t who she said she is. This should be a happy moment, all of your doubts were now proven right. But why did it hurt so much? 

Ian gets back tomorrow, you think, I have to tell him as soon as possible. 

While you are standing there thinking, Lauren walks out of the Kitchen, and notices you. 

“Hey, (Y/N),” she says with a smile.

“Hey,” you say as she walks over to you. She wraps her arms around your shoulders and you rest yours on her waist. 

“Are you ok?” she asks as she studies your face. 

“Yeah,” you say as you shoot her a reassuring smile and a peck on her lips. “I’m just tired. I think I am going to head to bed early today.”

“Oh, ok,” she says as you slip out of her arms. 

You wave bye as you quickly walk to your room, your head full. You pace around your room as you think about everything that has happened from the second that Lauren stepped into your life. Eventually, it feels like your brain is going to explode so you lay down, for a restless night of sleep. 

The next morning you stand out on the balcony looking out at the yard. From here, you have a perfect view of the garden, and you watch, as Lauren picks flowers. 

How could she have been lying this entire time? You think to yourself as you watch her careful movements. Was everything fake? Or were her feel real. I can’t believe I ever let her in. 

“Louise says you have been spending more time with Lauren,” Ian says as he walks up beside you, breaking you out of your thoughts. 

“I thought you would be happy that I am getting along with your girlfriend,” You say as you look over at him.

“You finally trust her?” He questions. 

“No,” you say with a shake of your head. He raises an eyebrow at you indicating that he wants you to continue. “She’s not who she says she is.”

He rolls his eyes and starts to walk away from you, but you reach out and stop him. 

“Can you just listen to me? I don’t know who she is working for, but somebody sent her here to catch you, me, and all of us.” He just stares at you for a second, when suddenly a bunch of cars pull up to the house, and men in suits jump out. 

You and Ian watch as they grab Lauren, and take her away. Not long after, they come and take you too. 

*Present Day*

Since then you, Ian, and the few of his partners that were at the house have been in prison. Seven long years. You were in prison when you learned that Lauren died, and you were still in that same prison when you learned that she was actually still alive. 

When Ian busted out of jail and got you out too, he was mad. And there was only one thing that he wanted. Revenge.

Lauren Reynolds is dead.

But Emily Prentiss isn’t. And you are going to go find her.


	39. Emily - 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning - There will be a sex scene in the middle of this story, but it is not entirely smut, so I will add a warning before the scene comes up, for people who want to read the story but don't want smut xoxo

*Emily’s POV*

As I turn the key to my apartment, It turns but there is no click. Instantly my hands go to my gun. I know for a fact that I locked the door before I left, so why is it not locked now. I push the door open gently and look around before I walk into the apartment. Just as I am putting my stuff down my phone rings, causing me to jump.

“This is Agent Prentiss,” I say as I answer the phone, expecting it to be somebody from work. 

“Prentiss,” the voice on the other end of the line hisses out, “Is that what you are going by now?”

Not only do I hear the voice through the phone, but I can also hear it echoing throughout the apartment. I pull my gun out of its holster as I look around in search of the source of the voice.

“Where are you?” I ask as I start to walk slowly towards my bedroom. 

“Your apartment’s not that big, I’m sure you could find me.” The voice taunts. 

As I get to the door, I turn the knob slowly and open it, to find a figure sitting directly in the middle of my bed. I aim my gun at them as I turn the light on. 

“(Y/N),” I let out in a breath, surprised at the person I see. She smiles at me and points to the gun in my hands. 

“You can put that down now. If I wanted to kill you I would’ve done it when you walked through the door.” I slowly put the gun down, but I still keep my guard up, unsure of what she is about to do. 

“You’re here with Doyle?” I ask as I take a couple of tentative steps closer to her.

“No,” she says, as she hops off of the bed. “Well, I mean yes, we are both in the country together, but no I am not with him.”

I pause for a second, as my adrenaline calms down now that I know I am not in any immediate danger. 

“What are you doing here?” I ask as I move across the room to put my gun away. 

“I came to warn you,” she says, making me stop in my tracks. 

“Warn me?” I ask as I turn around to look back over at her. 

“Yes warn you,” she says with a roll of her eyes, “Keep up.” She starts to move across the room, and I can’t help but follow her movements with my eyes. “You know Ian is here, but you don’t know how strong he has gotten. He has people everywhere and they’ve been watching you, following you. Everywhere that you go. I’m surprised that nobody was staked out watching your apartment.” She moves to the window and peeks outside. 

“Why are you telling me this,” I question. 

“Because for some reason,” she says with a sigh, as her gaze drifts over to me, “I don’t want you to die.”

This throws me for a loop. I understand why Ian is looking for me. He is angry at me and he wants revenge. Shouldn’t (Y/N) want the same thing?

“Even after everything I did, You’re not angry?” I ask as I narrow my eyes at her. 

“Oh no, I was pissed,” she says with a laugh. “You lied to me for months and then had me thrown into jail. But we forgive and forget right?”

“I’m sorry, it…” I start to say but she finishes my sentence for me. 

“Was all part of the job, I know,” she smiles at me, before turning back around and moving around the room again. Despite what she has said about not wanting me to die, I am starting to feel like I am trapped in a cage with a hungry lion, ready to pounce. 

I keep my eyes on her as she moves over to my dresser and picks up a picture I have of everybody on the team. She studies it for a moment before she starts speaking again. 

“Tell me about your team,” she says as she stands there and analyzes the picture as if she were looking for something. Whatever it is, she finds it and she tilts her head slightly before turning back to me. 

“No, don’t tell me about them. Tell me about her.” She points to JJ and my eyebrows furrow in confusion. “Her name is Jennifer right?” she asks with a smirk. 

“What about JJ?” I ask, my voice coming out more forceful than I intended. 

“Relax Emily,” she says, emphasizing my name, as she places the photo back on the dresser. “I just want to know if she took my place.”

“You never had a place,” I say as I cross my arms over my chest. 

“I didn’t?” she asks with a laugh, “I’m pretty sure I had a place in your bed on more than one occasion.” 

It feels like cotton is stuck in my mouth, and there is nothing I can say to get myself out of this situation. 

“That was a part of the job,” I say, trying my best not to stumble over my words. 

“Oh no, no, no. You getting close to Ian was part of the job. You falling for me was not.” 

“I only did it to keep an eye on you. You could have been detrimental for me,” I say honestly, well partially honestly.

It truly had started just as a way to keep her distracted. She was getting suspicious and couldn’t be left alone. But eventually, somehow in all of the madness, I started to really care for her.

“Do you still have feelings for me?” she asks suddenly, breaking me out of my thoughts. 

“No,” I respond quickly, a little too quickly. She smirks and takes a few steps closer to me. 

“Did you miss me?” she asks, her voice dropping to a sultry tone, as she is still moving closer to me. 

“No,” I say again, less confidently, as I match all of her steps forward with a step back. 

“Did JJ take my place?” she asks, her voice barely above a whisper, but I have no problem hearing her. By this time my back is pressed against the wall, and she has gotten so close to me that I could count all of her eyelashes if I wanted to. 

“No,” I say breathlessly. Her mouth turns up at the corners in a sinister smile, and she places both of her hands on either side of my head. 

“There’s the answer I was looking for,” she says, before leaning toward me and placing her lips over mine. 

I try to resist but there is no use. Truth be told, I did miss her, I missed this. Yeah JJ and I might have had a thing going on but it was nothing like this. Nobody else could ever make me feel like this. 

My heart starts to flutter and I can’t help but wrap my arms around her and pull her body impossibly closer to mine. I feel her give a light laugh. 

“There’s the woman I know,” she says against my lips. 

\- - - - - NSFW - - - - -

Pulling me off of the wall, she moves over to my bed. Slowly, she lowers both of us onto the bed, leaving me laying on my back and her hovering on top of me. She runs her hands up and down my sides, before grabbing the bottom of my shirt and pulling it over my head, my bra following not far behind. After she has my shirt off, she carefully looks over my body, as if she were trying to burn the image into her brain. 

“You’re so beautiful,” she says with a growl, as she starts to place kisses down my neck and chest, pausing only to circle her tongue around my nipples. She continues her assault of kisses down my body until she reaches the top of my pants. Smirking up at me, she undoes them and quickly slides them down my legs. 

Once my pants are off, she uses her pointer finger to play with the top of my underwear. Slowly her finger moves farther into my panties until she barely brushes over my clit. I let out a gasp in surprise and she just smirks at me. 

“Stop teasing,” I say, causing her to give a small laugh. 

“I haven’t had sex in 8 years, I think I deserve to take my time,” she says. Despite this though, she stops messing around and pulls my underwear off of my body. 

Her nimble fingers and gentle touch, drift lightly up and down my legs, getting closer to where I want her to be. 

So much for her not teasing, I think to myself as I squirm under her touch. Finally, she gives me what I want as she lightly runs her thumb over my clit. 

“Please, (Y/N),” I ask, my voice desperate, “I need more, I need you.”

“Well, If you insist,” she says with a devious look on her face before she slowly runs her tongue across my slit. I arch my back at the sudden pleasure, as her tongue moves expertly through my folds. Usually, it takes more to get me off, but I feel the tension quickly building. Just a little more and I would be a goner. 

(Y/N) must have been reading my mind or something because she wraps her lips around my clit and moans, sending vibrations directly up my spine and my brain goes foggy with pleasure as I cum. 

I feel (Y/N), working her way back up my body before she places a passionate kiss on my lips. As I regain some of my composure, I notice that at some point she had gotten undressed, and was now wearing nothing more than her panties. 

Attempting not to break the kiss, I push myself up to a sitting position, with (Y/N) straddling my lap. I reach around and caress her back, before making my way down to kneed my hands into her ass. 

I turn the two of us over, so I am now on top, and I reach down between our bodies and press my fingers against her. I can feel how wet she is. 

As I rub her center through her panties, she bites her lip in an attempt to be quiet. She never was one to give in easily. With a sly smile, I lean down to kiss and suck on her neck. Finally, she lets herself go as she throws her head back and moans. Gosh, I’m addicted to the way she sounds, it’s been so long since I’ve had the chance to hear it.

Pushing her panties to the side with my fingers, I circle her clit once, before dipping a couple of fingers into her heat. As I pump them in and out, she grinds her hips against my hand, to stimulate her clit with my palm. I watch as she reaches up and starts to pinch and play with her right nipple. While still moving my fingers inside of her, I bend down and take the left one into my mouth, and lightly graze my teeth across it. 

“Oh, Emily,” she calls out as she reaches her peak, and I can’t help but smile at the way my name, my real name, sounds on her tongue. If only I had the chance to hear it more than just tonight. 

After she cums, I pull my fingers out and suck her juices off of them. She smiles up at me as she pulls me down to lay on the bed next to her. We lay there for a bit, both catching our breaths until I feel (Y/N) wrap her arms around me and pull me closer to her. My back is against her chest and her hands are running lazily up and down my arm. 

\- - - - - Ok It’s over now - - - - -

“Hmm,” I hum in contentment, “I forgot you were a cuddler.” She laughs lightly before wrapping her arm around my waist and turning me over to a position where we are facing each other. She reaches up and pushes a few strands of my hair away from my face. I sigh, as we lock eyes. 

“You didn’t come here to warn me did you?” I ask, quietly. A sad smile plays on her lips. “Why are you really here?”

“I did want to warn you, but I’m really here,” she pauses for a moment as she gently caresses my cheek, “because you are good at your job. You made me fall for you. And even though it’s been eight years now, I still can’t stop thinking about you.” 

I can’t help but stare at her in disbelief. I would have never expected her to be this honest or this open with her feelings. 

“Don’t look at me like that,” she says, “not all criminals are heartless you know?” 

“You used to be,” I say. 

“Yeah, and then somebody very annoying had to come in and change that,” she says as her fingers start moving up and down my body again. I lean forward and kiss her lips, but she doesn’t kiss me back with the passion that was there earlier. This feels too much like a goodbye kiss. 

“You’re not staying? Not even until the morning?” I ask as she pulls away from me.

“You know that I can’t,” she says with a shake of her head, “I’ve already been here longer than I should.”

I know she is right, but I can’t help the tears that start to pool in the back of my eyes. I know her being here is wrong, and I know that I am the reason that we can’t be together, but I can’t stop thinking that I just got her back, and now we are going to have to be apart again. Probably forever. 

“Don’t look at me like that, or you’ll get us both in trouble,” she says as she wipes away the single tear that has run down my face, “You’re a big bad FBI agent now, you have to follow all of the rules.” 

“(Y/N),” I start to say, but she kisses me and cuts me off. 

“Can I just ask you one thing, Emily?” she asks.

“What?”

“Honestly, did you miss me?” she asks the same question that she asked earlier. 

“Yeah, I missed you. A lot,” I say softly.

“I know,” she says with a smirk, “I just wanted you to say it.” I pull her close to me and give her another long kiss before she finally has to untangle herself from the sheets.

I watch her movements, methodical and steady, as she gets ready to leave. As her hand is on the door, I call out to her. 

“I love you," I say impulsively. She turns back around to me, smiles, and nods. 

“Don’t die on me Emily,” she says as she walks out of my bedroom, and shortly I hear the apartment door, close, and with that, she is gone.


	40. Paris - 3

Emily Prentiss is dead. 

Why does this feel like deja vu?

This time though, it was no accident. Not by a long shot. 

Ian Doyle killed her. The guy you saw as a brother, killed the woman that you love. 

At this point, you weren’t sure what to do or believe. Everything just felt so messed up. 

In this line of work, it is only natural to have to make sacrifices, and you’ve never given them a second thought. But having to lose the best woman that you had ever met, crossed the line. 

So you got out. You didn’t tell Doyle or anybody that didn’t need to know, but you are now officially out of the game. 

For the time being, you were settled in France. Everything still needed to settle down a bit before the rest of your life could really begin, so to pass the time, you’ve started frequenting a cute cafe. It was here that you spot a familiar face. 

No, you think to yourself, it can’t be. 

Just as the thought goes through your head, the woman gets up from her table and starts to walk off in the other direction. Hastily, you throw a five euro note on the table to pay for the tea you had been drinking and rush after her. 

This is something that only a crazy person would do, follow a total stranger down the street. But there is something in your gut telling you that this isn’t just some stranger. 

You manage to keep up with her for a couple of blocks until she gets to an apartment building. As she walks inside, you move to the window, which gives you a clear view of the lobby. You watch as she gets in the elevator, and finally, she turns around so you can get a really good look at her face. 

It’s her. 

\- - - - - - - - - - - -

After knowing what building she lived in, finding her flat number was not a hard thing to do. So just like before, you let yourself into her house and lay in wait. 

As you are waiting you start to take a look around. Unlike her other apartment, this one was fairly empty. No pictures, barely any furniture, and nothing that could tell you anything about the person who stayed here. 

Understandable, you say to yourself, it only makes sense that she would keep herself as far under the radar as possible, even in her own home. 

As you move around the space, you hear the click of the lock. As you start to walk towards the door, she walks into the apartment, not noticing you standing in the hallway. 

You would know that perfect hair and those kind brown eyes anywhere. There is no denying it now, this woman was definitely Emily. 

“I thought I told you not to die,” you say. That gets her attention and her head whips around to you. The bags that were in her hands fall to the floor as she stands there, stunned. 

“We have got to stop meeting like this,” you say with a smirk. She starts to smile, but suddenly it is replaced with a look of fear. 

“What are you doing here?” she asks, panicked, as her eyes dart around the room. 

“It’s ok,” you assure her, as you move closer to her and grab her hands in yours, “Ian doesn’t know.”

She stops looking around the room and meets your gaze. You can see the panic slowly slip away. 

“What?” she asks quietly. You nod your head and smile at her. 

“He doesn’t know. He doesn’t know that you're alive, he doesn’t even know that I am here right now. I promise you, it’s just me.”

“You’re serious?” she asks as the smile comes back onto her face. 

“Hell, yeah I’m serious,” you say with a joyful laugh. 

Emily throws her arms around you in a tight, almost suffocating hug, but you don’t care. All that matters is that you got your girl back. 

When the two of you let go of each other, Emily is still beaming and her eyes wander over you as if you would disappear if she dares take her eyes off you. 

“I can’t believe it. I just...when did you...how did you?” You laugh as she struggles to get out a sentence. You place your hands on either side of her face and look her in the eye. 

“We can talk about all of that later. Right now I just really want to kiss you,” you say as you lean closer to her lips. Just as you are about to connect yours to her though, she pulls back. 

“Wait,” she says as she furrowed her eyebrows, “If you were able to find me, that means that other people can find me. We aren’t safe. Ian could come after me and if he does and he finds out that you are here too, he could kill both of us and…” 

With a roll of your eyes, you kiss her to get her to stop rambling. She sighs into the kiss, as it seems to have distracted her for the time being. She wraps her arms around your waist and pulls her body closer to yours. When you break the kiss, you look her in the eye, as you gently caress her cheek. 

“I found out purely by accident, or maybe fate or something,” you say, “You are safe, Emily, I swear. We are both safe, and we are both here, so can you please just stop thinking and be happy for a second.”

She lets out a soft giggle. 

“I am happy,” she says, “you make me happy.”

“Good,” you say, “because you make me happy too.” 

“That was awfully sweet, (Y/N),” she says as she pokes you lightly in the ribs. 

“Yeah, you tend to do that to me,” you say as you pull her into another hug. This hug was much less suffocating than the last one. The two of you are just savoring each other’s touch, the touch that you thought you would never get to feel again. 

“I love you,” Emily says softly Your mind flashes to the last time that she said those words. At the time, you couldn’t say it back. It would've hurt too much to admit the truth and then never see her again. But things were much different now. 

“I love you too,” you say with a smile as you think about the future.

The life that you two could have together might not be orthodox or typical, considering that neither one of you have a place to go anymore. 

But you had each other, and after everything that the two of you have been through, nothing else really matters.


	41. Clumsy and Awkward

“I can’t believe I am late,” you say to yourself as you rush into the elevator. 

First-day jitters are not enough to describe the way that you are feeling. You barely slept last night, due partially to excitement and partially to fear, so you were already behind. And on top of that, you spent the entire morning just picking out what you were going to wear, which ended up making you late.

Today you were being interviewed to see if you would be starting your first day at the BAU. Not many people get to say that they were recruited into the BAU straight out of college, but hopefully, you are the exception. You had been in some of the classes that Dr. Reid taught, and he took a liking to you, so he put in a good word, and now, here you were. 

You bounce on the balls of your feet, as the elevator slowly makes its way up to where you need to be. Right as the door opens you rush out, but just as you turn the corner, you smash into somebody, leaving both of you sprawled out on the floor. 

“Oh my gosh, I’m sorry,” you say. As you look over at her, you notice a large brown stain, which you assume is not a new fashion trend. 

“Did I make you spill your coffee? I am so so sorry, how much did the shirt cost? I will buy you a new one I promise,” you start to ramble but she just laughs. 

“It’s ok, I have a change of clothes in my go-bag,” she says as she stands up. She picks up the spilled coffee cup and throws it away before walking back over to you and offering her hand to you. You take her hand and she helps you stand up. 

“I’m Emily,” she says, not letting go of your hand. 

“I’m...” 

“(Y/N),” you turn your head when you hear your name, and see Dr. Reid walking towards you. 

“Hello, Dr. Reid,” you say as he approaches. 

“It’s great to see you again. If you're looking for Hotch’s office, it’s the first one at the top of the stairs,” he says with a smile. 

“Thank you,” you say to Reid. “And I’m sorry again about the coffee,” you apologize to Emily one more time before waving bye and heading up to Hotch's office. 

*Emily’s POV*

“You have coffee on your shirt,” Reid says after (Y/N) walks away. I roll my eyes at him. 

“Thank you very much, genius, but I kind of already knew that,” I say to him, as I move toward my desk to grab my go-bag. 

“How did you get coffee on your shirt?” He asks, following me into the bullpen. 

“I bumped into your friend, right before you came over. Spilled my coffee,” I say. 

“Yeah, (Y/N) isn’t the most coordinated,” he says with a nod. 

“But she wants to be in the BAU?” I ask as I grab a shirt out of my bag. 

“Well what she lacks in grace, she more than makes up for in her smarts and deductive skills,” Reid says. 

“Is she as smart as you?” I ask Reid, causing him to furrow his eyebrows. 

“Nobody is as smart as me,” he says. 

I laugh and roll my eyes before looking up to Hotch’s office. Through the window, I see (Y/N), sitting down at Hotch’s desk. 

“I know that look,” Morgan says as he walks over to the two of us. 

“What look?” I ask. 

“That is the look of attraction, Emily has a crush on the newbie,” Morgan says with a laugh, and I lightly slap his arm. 

“I do not,” I say, “I just think she is a little cute, that’s all.” 

“Well, let's hope she gets the job,” Reid says before walking over to his desk. 

“Hey, Is that coffee on your shirt?” Morgan asks. 

I let out a groan and head to go change. 

*Reader POV*

“Well, you might be young, but your intellect seems only to be topped by Dr. Reid himself,” Hotch says. 

“Thank you, sir,” you say, barely containing the smile that wants to break out on your face. Hotch stands up from behind his chair, and you follow suit. Walking around the desk, he reaches out to shake your hand. 

“Welcome to the team,” he says, with a small smile. 

“Wait seriously?” you ask in surprise, “Oh my gosh thank you, sir.” You throw your arms around him in a hug, before immediately pulling back and realizing your mistake. 

“I’m so sorry sir, I didn’t mean to…” you start to apologize but he just smiles. 

“It’s fine, (Y/N), just don’t do it again,” he says. 

“Yes, sir,” you respond. 

With that, he turns around and you follow him to the roundtable room, to find everybody gathered there. Their eyes all turn to you in expectation. 

“Everyone, this is (Y/N) (Y/L/N), she will be joining the team,” Hotch says.

A blonde woman claps her hands and jumps up from the table and rushes over to throw her arms around you. 

“I’m so excited you’re here, Reid has told me a little about you, but not nearly enough. We need to have a girls' night and we can get to know each other.” She says quickly. 

“Babygirl, let the girl breathe please,” a very muscular man says to her. She squeezes you one more time, before letting you go and walking back to her seat. 

The team goes around the table introducing themselves, and they are all so nice. You feel like you're going to end up liking them very much, especially Garcia. Once introductions are over, you find the last seat available, which is coincidentally next to Emily. 

“I see you got a new shirt,” you whisper to her, as you sit down. 

“I see you got the job,” she says smiling over at you. 

“Ok,” Garcia starts as she grabs the remote for the big screen. “This one is not pretty my friends…”

Garcia introduces the case and immediately you are thrown into the deep end. The team is talking and bouncing around ideas while you just kind of sit there, looking at the files in your hand. You work much better when you think in your own head than you do with group work. So, you sit in silence as you read and reread the information. While reading an idea comes to your head, so you raise your hand, waiting for your turn to talk. 

“(Y/N), you know you don’t have to raise your hand right? You aren’t in school anymore,” Hotch says, causing you to look up, and notice that everybody has stopped talking and is staring at you. Instantly your face is filled with embarrassment and a pink tint fills your cheeks. 

“Sorry, I’m sorry. I just had an idea and everybody was talking and I didn’t want to just interject so I was waiting for my turn and…”

“Hey, kid, it’s ok. What was the idea that you had?” Rossi says, cutting you off from your rambling. 

“Well,” you say as you try and shake off some of the nervousness and embarrassment, “the stab wounds aren’t deep, so you would assume that they were done by somebody weak. But it only takes one hit to knock them unconscious, which shows that their abductor is very strong. This could mean a multitude of things, but when you pair that with the fact that somehow multiple young beautiful women were lured into this trap, I would say that this is a team, of an attractive man and a woman. The man does the abducting and the woman does the killing.” 

As you finish your analysis you look around and notice that everybody is still staring at you. Your nerves start to come back full swing. 

“But that might not be right, it's just a guess,” you say nervously. 

“No, I think you’re onto something,” Hotch says. 

“Really?” you ask quietly. 

“Yeah,” Hotch says with a nod, “we’ll look at it from this angle. Wheels up in thirty everyone.”

In the thirty minutes before the plane takes off, you sneak away to the bathroom. You aren’t even halfway through the day and you are already making a fool of yourself. You splash your face with water and take a couple of deep breaths. 

Just then somebody else walks into the bathroom. Turning around, you see that it is Emily. 

“Hey, (Y/N), are you ok?” she asks. 

“Yes,” you say, but then decide if you were going to become closer to the team, you probably shouldn’t lie to them. “Actually no not really.”

“What’s wrong?” Emily asks as she moves over to you. 

“It’s my first day and I am already embarrassing myself,” you say with a sigh. 

“What are you talking about, you haven’t embarrassed yourself,” Emily says. 

“I spilled coffee on your shirt before I even met you,” you say. 

“I had an extra shirt,” she counters. 

“I raised my hand at the roundtable.”

“And then gave some really good insight into the case.”

“I hugged Hotch.”

“Wh...you hugged Hotch?” Emily asks in surprise. 

“See,” you say with a groan, “I just keep on embarrassing myself.”

“I think it’s cute,” she says with a shrug. You look over at her and catch her eye. 

“You think it’s cute that I am clumsy and awkward?” you ask. 

“Yes, I think it is cute that you are clumsy and awkward,” she says as she grabs your hand. “I also just think you are cute all around.” A blush comes onto your cheeks and you let out a nervous giggle. 

“Now that was just adorable,” Emily says, “keep it up and I might have to ask you on a date.”

“A d...you wanna...ask me...huh?” you stutter out causing Emily to laugh. 

“Yeah, I wanna ask you on a date. What do you say?” She asks. 

“Yes!” you blurt out, “I mean yeah, yes I would love that.”

“Good,” Emily says with a smile, “Now come on, the big awkward brain of yours has a case to solve.”


	42. A Single Rose

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Valentines themes imagine! xoxo

Valentine's day. A day filled with mixed emotions and lots of chocolate. Being the hopeless romantic that you are, you’ve always had a special place in your heart for the holiday, unfortunately, that seemed to be the only thing in your heart. In the past, you haven’t had too many people that you wanted to spend the holiday with. Well, that was until now. 

Now you had Emily, whether the whole world knew or not. The two of you might still be keeping your relationship on the down-low, but that didn’t mean that you didn’t have feelings for the sassy brunette. But the fact that you two were a secret did make things a little more complicated. 

I mean, what exactly do you get your super-secret, but super sexy, girlfriend for a holiday that you don’t even know if she enjoys. 

This thought is running through your head as you walk into the BAU. Instantly you are struck by the sight of so many streamers and balloons that it had to be some kind of fire safety hazard. It looks like cupid puked on the walls. And to match the decor, comes the perky blonde who is probably responsible for all of this. 

“(Y/N)!” Garcia calls to you, as she rushes over, surprisingly quick in her hot pink high heels. “You will never guess what I walked into this morning. Come on,” she says as she grabs your hand and drags you behind her. 

“Garcia, I haven’t even put my stuff down,” you say. 

“Oh, you can do that later,” she says as the two of you around the corner, and approach her office. “Now look,” she says as she opens the door. 

As it swings open, you cannot stop your jaw from dropping to the floor. Virtually every available inch of space is covered in vases of multicolored flowers, stuffed animals, and enough candy to give every dentist in Virginia cavities. 

“All of this is from Kevin?” you ask as you look around the room in awe. 

“Isn’t it wonderful, that guy is a sweetheart,” she says, with a beaming smile. You are so happy seeing Garcia get this happy, but you can’t help the small twang that sparks in your chest. 

“Yeah, Pen, this is lovely. But I really do need to put my stuff down, this bag is getting heavy,” you say, mainly to try and get yourself out of this situation. 

“Ok, but be sure to come back later so we can chat ok!” she says with a wave, before walking back into her office to primp her flowers. 

You sigh as you turn around and walk back to your desk. As you sit down, you catch JJ’s attention and she makes her way over to you.

“Garcia just showed you her office didn’t she?” she asks as she leans against your desk. 

“I don’t know what Kevin does to get paid enough to afford all of that, but I think I need a bigger salary,” you say to JJ, causing her to laugh. 

“Yeah well, Will didn’t go all out like that on gifts, but apparently the place he is taking me tonight is not cheap,” JJ says. 

“Oh,” you say, your heart sinking just a little more, “that is so sweet.” You hide the pain in your voice, and plaster a smile to try and be happy for your friend. 

“Are you sure you can watch Henry tonight?” she asks. 

“Of course I am sure, you and Will need a night out!” you insist. At least this way somebody would be having fun tonight. 

“Did I hear that (Y/N) is watching Henry tonight?” Emily asks as she walks over to the two of you. 

“Yeah,” you say with a smile, a genuine one this time. 

“Do you mind if I join, I love that little guy,” Emily asks, looking between JJ and you. 

“It’s fine with me if it’s fine with (Y/N), I know Henry would love to see his “Aunty Emmy,” JJ says, as she looks over at you. 

“Of course you can come, Emily, the more the merrier,” you say. 

Truthfully, Emily was planning on coming anyway. She already knew about JJ’s plans to go out, and your plans to watch her son. This was just a way for the two of you to discretely spend time with each other without having to lie or go behind anybody’s back. 

“Great!” JJ says, “I really appreciate you guys so much.” She says, shooting you one last smile before she gets up and heads back to her office. 

“See you tonight?” Emily asks, giving you a sly wink. You blush and smile at her. 

“See you tonight.”

\- - - - - - - - - - - - 

The day is going by surprisingly fast. Before you even know it is 1:30 in the afternoon and you and Morgan are sitting in the empty roundtable room, eating your lunch together. 

You are trying to pay attention and act as normal as possible, but you seem to have lost your appetite, and you stopped listening to Morgan a whole ago. 

“Ok, spill it,” Morgan says halfway through the meal.

“What?” you ask as you look up at him. 

“I’ve known you long enough to know that the only time you look like that, is when something is bothering you. So come on out with it. What’s got you so worried?” He asks. 

You sigh and look over at him. 

“It’s valentine's day,” you say to him, and he nods in understanding. 

Morgan was the only person who knew about you and Emily’s relationship. Being that he was your best friend, and Emily’s field partner, it was kind of hard to keep it a secret. Which was a good thing because honestly, you didn’t want to keep it a secret from him anyway. 

“You’re upset that you’re not doing anything with Emily?” he asks, in a quiet tone, to make sure the conversation stayed private. 

“Is it bad if I say yes?” you ask.

“It’s not bad at all,” he says with a shake of his head, “it’s understandable that there will be some grief in the thought of not spending the “day of love” with the person you love.”

“It’s more than that though,” you say, “It feels a bit like an angry pain in my chest.”

“Oohhh,” he says, as he crosses his arms over his chest and leans back in his chair. “I know what’s wrong with you.”

“What? What’s wrong?” you ask, confused, as you look over at his smug face. 

“You’re jealous,” he says. 

“No, I am not,” you say with a shake of your head. 

“So you don’t care that Garcia got sent enough gifts to fill a store and that JJ is being taken out to a fancy restaurant.”

“Well, I mean,” you say as you start to think about it. 

“Face it, you are jealous,” Morgan says. 

“But I don’t want to be!” you insist. “I don’t want to feel like valentine's day is based on gifts and showing off. I know Emily loves me so why do I still want more?”

“Because it is natural, I promise you. Just talk to Emily and tell her how you feel,” Morgan says. 

“No way, I can’t.”

“Why not?” he asks, concussion written on his face. 

“Because I don't want to pressure her to do anything that she wasn’t originally going to do. If she doesn’t want to celebrate, then I don’t want her to feel like she has to.” Morgan just stares at you for a moment, before he laughs. 

“You’re in bad,” he says. 

“Morgan, help me,” you practically beg him. 

“Hey,” he says as he holds his hands up in surrender, “I may be the love expert when it comes to single ladies, but I don’t do commitment. I’ve helped all that I can.”

“Yeah thanks a lot,” you say to him with a roll of your eyes. He just shrugs, as his gaze moves over to your half-eaten sandwich. 

“Are you gonna eat that?”

\- - - - - - - - - - - - 

“You really tired that kid out,” you say to Emily as you walk back to JJ’s living room. 

You Emily and Henry had run around and played for the better part of the evening. He was so pooped by the end of the night, that he had fallen asleep before you even got him tucked in. 

“He is going to sleep good tonight.” Just as you finish your sentence, you walk into the room and see Emily standing there holding just one thing. 

A single rose. 

“Em,” is all that you can say as you stand there, looking at her in surprise. 

“I know it’s not much,” she says as she walks closer to you, “but I wasn’t sure what you would like.”

“I love it,” you say as she hands the rose to you, and you gently take it from her hands. 

“Are you sure,” she asks you nervously, “I kind of overheard your conversation with Morgan. I would’ve done something bigger or more expensive, but I was a little short on time.”

You close the distance that was between the two of you and wrap your arms around her neck, pulling her lips to yours. You feel her sigh into the kiss, as she places her hands on your waist, and pulls your body closer to hers. As the two of you reluctantly break the kiss, you rest your forehead on hers, and the hand that isn’t holding the rose plays in her hair. 

“Emily Prentiss,” you say to her, “this is better than any gift that I could have asked for.”

“Even though it wasn’t expensive, and I gave it to you after a night of being on baby duty?” She asks. 

“It doesn’t have to be expensive, as long as it comes from you,” you say as you press another light kiss on her lips. “And I liked being on baby duty with you, it might have given us a glimpse into the future.” 

You quickly throw the last part in there before unwrapping yourself from Emily’s arms and walking away, a sly grin on your face. 

“Hey, wait a minute,” Emily says as she catches up to you and wraps her arms around you from behind. “Did you just say what I think you said?” she asks, her voice in your ear making you shiver. 

“Maybe,” you say as you spin around in her arms. She places her hands on the side of your face and kisses you with so much love and passion that you get butterflies in your stomach. 

“Happy Valentine’s Day,” she whispers against your lips.

“Happy Valentine’s Day.”


	43. Everything Alright?

Your eyes drift open as you hear the muffled closing of the front door. Rolling over in your bed, you look at the clock, which reads 2:28 in the morning. 

Emily must have just gotten home, you think to yourself as you turn back over and begin to settle back into the covers.

With her job, it is not unusual for her to come in at all hours of the night. It has become a habit of yours, that when she arrives home late, she will come to your bedroom, kiss your forehead before she gets in the shower, and then join you in bed. 

Waiting for a couple of moments, you expect to hear the bedroom door opening, as Emily follows your normal routine, but you start to get worried when it doesn’t come. Sitting up, you push yourself out of the bed and cautiously move into the hallway to investigate.

As you walk through the house, you make sure to keep yourself alert and aware of anything out of place, but the only thing you notice is a dark figure sitting at the kitchen counter. As you get closer, you see that it is only your wife, and in her hands, she is holding a glass of whiskey. 

She still hasn’t noticed you, her attention focused solely on the ice cubes clinking against the sides of the cup. In order to get her attention, you clear your throat. 

Her head whips up, in a moment of panic, but her eyes quickly return to their former solemn state, when she notices that it is just you. 

“Did I wake you up?” she asks you. Her voice comes out hoarse and raspy as if she had been yelling. You shake your head slightly, as you move closer to her. 

Now that you are closer, you can see that her shirt seems dirty and disheveled, the top few buttons undone. On her collar bones, neck, and face, you can make out a few bruises and cuts, and your heart throbs. 

“Everything Alright?” you ask her gently.

“I’m fine,” she says as she brings the strong drink up to her lips. You watch her movements, as she takes a long sip, and finishes off whatever was left of the whiskey. 

Closing the little gap that the two of you had between each other, you take a couple more steps closer and reach your hand out. She looks at you expectantly and turns her body towards you. Lightly, you brush the tips of your fingertips across a particularly nasty black eye that seems to be forming. She winces under your touch, and you pull your hand away. 

“What’s wrong?” you ask, matching the same worried tone you used earlier. Looking back down, she just shakes her head. You’ve learned over the years that this means she’s not going to talk about it. She rarely ever does. 

But what she does do is take your hand in hers, and bring it up to her lips. She softly kisses the backs of your knuckles, before moving your hand up to cup her cheek. With a sigh, her eyes flutter closed, and she leans into your warm touch. 

When she opens her eyes and looks back up at you, you can see the tears that have started to well up in her eyes. The two of you share a silent look of understanding before you take a step closer to her, standing in between her legs, and pull her closer to you. She wraps her arms around your waist and buries her head in your shoulder. 

The two of you stay like that for a while longer, you didn’t bother trying to keep track of the time. Periodically you can hear Emily's sniffles and whimpers, and you’ll pull her closer to you. Not a single word is uttered between the two of you for the rest of the night. You don’t need them, they would just get in the way.


	44. Breakfast in Bed

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In this story, (Y/N) and Emily have a daughter. Instead of naming her myself, I will write (D/N), daughter’s name, so that you can name her whatever you want. Hope you all enjoy! Xoxo
> 
> Also heavily influenced by Season 12 Episode 2

You hear the front door closing, and slowly open your eyes. As you look around you notice that you aren’t in your usual king-size bed. Instead, you are squeezed into a twin, with your daughter tucked up underneath you. 

You start to try and gently move out of the bed, but her eyes blink open, and she looks up at you with her little lip poked out as if she were about to cry. You lay back down next to her and pull her closer to your side, and she quickly calms down. 

Just then, you notice Emily peek her head into the room, a confused look on her face. She is about to start talking, but you hold your finger up to your lips in a shushing motion. Looking back down at your daughter, you notice that she has drifted back off asleep so you try to get up again, this time you are more successful. 

You walk across the room and grab Emily’s arm and lead her out of the bedroom. 

“What are you doing?” she asks you in a hushed manner, “It’s 3 in the morning.”

“What happened to your hand?” you ask as you notice that she has a bandage wrapped around her hand. She glances down at it, her demeanor shaking for a moment, but she looks back up to you with the same expression as before. 

“Why were you in (D/N)’s room?” she asks, ignoring your question.

“She had a fever and couldn’t sleep,” you say with a shrug. 

“She’s sick?” Emily asks, her voice rising in panic. 

“She’s fine Em,” you say. “I gave her some medicine about an hour ago.”

“I should check on her,” Emily says as she starts to open the door, but you reach out and grab her wrist, stopping her. 

“Emily, she just went to sleep, she needs her rest.”

“How long has she been sick?” she asks you, her eyes still glued to the door. 

“The past two days,” you answer. 

“Did you call the doctor?” she asks as she looks up at you, her voice filling with growing anger. 

“Of course I did Em,” you say with a sigh, “I’ve been doing everything that I need to, and she is getting better.” Her gaze softens, and you can see some of the anger drain out of her. 

“You should have called me,” she says, in a much softer tone. 

“Why?” you ask, “I had it under control.”

You and Emily stand there for a moment, both of you looking at each other. You try and figure out what is going on with Emily, but you’ve never seen her act like this before. Eventually, She pulls away from you and starts to walk through the door again. 

“Emily,” you start to say, but she cuts you off. 

“Can you please just let me check on my daughter?” she asks, her voice coming out in a rushed whisper. You look at her and notice that there is a glisten of tears in her eyes. 

“Fine,” you say, giving in. “I’ll be in the kitchen when you’re done.”

With that, Emily walks into (D/N)’s room, and you turn around and head downstairs to the kitchen. Knowing that something was going on with Emily and that you planned to get down to the cause of it, you put on a pot of coffee and prepare for a long night. 

It’s not much longer when you hear Emily’s footsteps coming down the stairs. As she walks into the kitchen, you pull out the chair next to you and motion for her to sit down. Reluctantly she does, and you pass her her mug full of coffee. 

“Emily what is going on?” you ask. 

“Nothing,” she insists, but you know she’s lying.

“Do you want to talk about it?” you ask gently. But the only response you get is her silence, as she ducks her head and looks at the floor. 

“Well we have to talk about it, you know that,” you try to convince her, but she is stubborn. Finally, you give up on trying to get your questions answered, so you try a different approach. 

“How is your hand?” She glances up at you and she instinctively hides her bandaged hand under the table. 

“It’s fine,” she says. 

“What did you do to it?”

“I burned it.” 

“How?” She pauses for a moment as if she were calculating her answer. 

“There was a bomb and a fire,” she says. “Look can we do this in the morning, I am exhausted.” She stands up from the table and starts to walk out of the kitchen. 

“Emily,” you call to her, your voice much more serious than before. She stops in her tracks and turns back to you. “Sit down.”

She stands there for a second before she reluctantly walks back over and sits back down. You move your chair closer and you look her in the eye.

“Please, talk to me Em.” She looks back into your eyes, and her resolve finally breaks.

“I couldn’t,” she says in a quiet, almost timid voice, “I couldn’t save them.” 

“You can’t blame yourself for anything that happened,” you say. 

“Well then who am I supposed to blame?” Emily asks, the pain obvious in her voice. 

“The unsub,” you reply, “you can’t blame anybody other than the unsub for anything that happened.”

“He set off a bomb,” she starts to explain. “There were kids inside. They were trapped and we didn’t have time to wait for backup. We were so close to getting them out, so close to saving them all. But then the ceiling collapsed with 2 kids left in the building. We couldn’t get them.” 

She pauses for a moment, and you gently reach up to her face and wipe away the tears that had fallen from her eyes.

“If Morgan hadn’t pulled me out I could have gotten to them,” she continues. 

“Or you could’ve died. Emily, you did everything that you possibly could have, and that makes you a hero. To me, to (D/N), and to every single life that you have saved.”

She looks at you with a mix of sadness and guilt. Standing up, you pull her into a hug and she buries her head in your shoulder. 

\- - - - - - - - - - - - 

As you wake up the next morning, you hear movement over the baby monitor. Slipping out from under the covers you walk to your daughter’s room and see her sitting up in her bed. 

“Hey, Sweetie,” you say as you walk over and place your hand on her forehead. She is not nearly as hot as she was the night before. “Are you feeling better?” The small four-year-old nods her head and reaches her arms upward. You pick her up, and she lays her head on your shoulder. 

“Is momma home?” she asks sleepily. 

“Yeah,” you say as you rub her back, “but she’s sleeping lovebug, she got in really late last night.”

“From work?” she asks. 

“Yes, from work,” you answer her as the two of you walk out of the room and head downstairs.

“Can we wake her up?” she asks. 

“Why do you want to wake her up?”

“Because Momma is fun,” she says. 

“Am I not fun?” you ask as you tickle her sides and she just giggles. “How about this? We can wake her up, but only if you help me with something first.”

She perks her head up, suddenly not tired anymore, and looks at you with excitement. 

“I can help!” she says, her eyes bright.

“Good,” you say with a giggle, “we can make her breakfast.”

\- - - - - - - - - - - 

“Can you hand me the eggs? Be careful they are... *splat* ...fragile.”

“Sorry, mommy,”

\- - - - - - - - - - - -

“What else should we add?”

“Can we add some chocolate chips?” 

“I think that sounds perfect.”

\- - - - - - - - - - - - 

“What is that?”

“Coffee.”

“Can I have coffee?”

“Absolutely not.”

\- - - - - - - - - - - - 

You expertly carry the tray full of food while (D/N) runs ahead of you. She bounds up the stairs, and excitedly makes her way to your bedroom. As you get to the door, you see her already on the bed, shaking Emily awake. 

“Momma wake up!” she says as she grabs Emily’s face, “I made you breakfast.”

Emily opens her eyes and looks up at her, a soft smile coming onto her face. 

“You made me breakfast?” she asks, and the four-year-old nods her head animatedly. Emily glances over at you and gives you a nervous look. 

“I made breakfast,” you say with a laugh as you walk over and place the tray of food down on the nightstand, “but she was my little helper.” 

“Are you ok momma? You have a boo-boo.” (D/N) says to Emily as she looks down at her bandaged hand. 

“I’m ok,” Emily says as she kisses her on the forehead. 

“Did you get hurt fighting the bad guys?” she asks as she sits in Emily’s lap.

“Yeah,” Emily says with a nod. 

“But you won right?” the four-year-old asks with a smile. Emily pauses and a sad look comes on her face. You move over to sit on the bed next to them and grab Emily’s good hand. 

“Of course she won,” you say, “she got the bad guys.”

“That’s good. I’ll kiss your hand and make it better,” she picks up Emily’s bandaged hand and gives it a gentle kiss. You and Emily both laugh and the sweetness of it. 

“Look at that,” Emily says, “it feels all better now. Now, I need to eat this amazing breakfast before it gets cold.”

“I added the chocolate chips.” (D/N) says as Emily takes her first bite, “Do you like it?

“I love it,” she says as she boops (D/N) and the nose. She turns her head to you and gives you a light kiss on the lips. “Thank you,” she says in a soft whisper.


End file.
